Stone Butches

*Anya* · 07-08-2011, 06:41 AM

In the beginning, I knew I was lesbian but had no knowledge of all the sub-cultures within the culture.

My first GF's were femme because they were my friends. My best friend & I had a sexual relationship for a few years. I always felt like something was missing-something was: profound, visceral, sexual attraction.

Then I met my ex. She rocked my world. Besides the fact that I was able to respond to her as no others before her, I learned a great deal about lesbian culture of the time.

She never felt like a girl & frankly never really looked like one either. Her mother tried desperately to make her into one. Pictures of her as a little girl really look like a little boy in a dress. When she came out, in the bar culture, her friends strongly identified as stone.

They even had an old-school word for butches that allowed sexual touch: Kiki. In her world, you were either butch or femme, you did not "swing both ways", so to speak. She did not want to be Kiki!

I knew nothing of this sub-culture when we first got together and I did not understand this but accepted it.<<disallowed word>>

Having had relationships with selfish bio men before I came out, men who always seemed to suffer from premature ejaculation; honestly I thought I had died & gone to heaven! Someone happy to pleasure me for hours on end (hey we were young!) what's to think about?!! I fell in love with her & when you love someone, you accept them for who & what they are, right?

No actual thought process about her being stone for a long time. I
missed reciprocating but accepted it- I was too busy enjoying myself & she was too.<<disallowed word>>

Stone or not, lesbian sex is lesbian sex! I am pretty much open to whatever comes my way, I try not to use labels. Regardless if was with a stone butch, butch or TG; I would still be a queer femme, the sexual identity of my partner does not change who I am.

No thought process involved at all with that.

PS: what is the "disallowed word" thing all about? I don't understand. The word fuck is not disallowed but innocuous words are?

07-08-2011, 06:41 AM	#11
Anya Infamous Member How Do You Identify?: Lesbian non-stone femme Preferred Pronoun?: She, her Relationship Status: Committed to being good to myself Join Date: Jun 2011 Location: West Coast Posts: 8,258 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 39,306 Thanked 40,460 Times in 7,283 Posts Rep Power: 21474858	Thought process? In the beginning, I knew I was lesbian but had no knowledge of all the sub-cultures within the culture. My first GF's were femme because they were my friends. My best friend & I had a sexual relationship for a few years. I always felt like something was missing-something was: profound, visceral, sexual attraction. Then I met my ex. She rocked my world. Besides the fact that I was able to respond to her as no others before her, I learned a great deal about lesbian culture of the time. She never felt like a girl & frankly never really looked like one either. Her mother tried desperately to make her into one. Pictures of her as a little girl really look like a little boy in a dress. When she came out, in the bar culture, her friends strongly identified as stone. They even had an old-school word for butches that allowed sexual touch: Kiki. In her world, you were either butch or femme, you did not "swing both ways", so to speak. She did not want to be Kiki! I knew nothing of this sub-culture when we first got together and I did not understand this but accepted it.<<disallowed word>> Having had relationships with selfish bio men before I came out, men who always seemed to suffer from premature ejaculation; honestly I thought I had died & gone to heaven! Someone happy to pleasure me for hours on end (hey we were young!) what's to think about?!! I fell in love with her & when you love someone, you accept them for who & what they are, right? No actual thought process about her being stone for a long time. I missed reciprocating but accepted it- I was too busy enjoying myself & she was too.<<disallowed word>> Stone or not, lesbian sex is lesbian sex! I am pretty much open to whatever comes my way, I try not to use labels. Regardless if was with a stone butch, butch or TG; I would still be a queer femme, the sexual identity of my partner does not change who I am. No thought process involved at all with that. PS: what is the "disallowed word" thing all about? I don't understand. The word fuck is not disallowed but innocuous words are? __________________ ~Anya~ Democracy Dies in Darkness ~Washington Post "...I'm deeply concerned by recently adopted policies which punish children for their parents’ actions ... The thought that any State would seek to deter parents by inflicting such abuse on children is unconscionable." UN Human Rights commissioner