What TO DO in a relationship.....

Tawse · 09-07-2011, 06:27 PM

accept the fact that you're going to argue

make an agreement that if the argument gets too passionate - you'll drop it so that both of you can calm down.

make an agreement that the disagreement will be readdressed when both are in a better head space.

understand that you both need to have your own life, you don't have to share every facet of your lives with each other.

understand that there will be times where it will be much easier to walk away from each other than to stay and work it out - make an agreement that barring "deal breakers" you'll both strive as hard as possible to work it out.

Remember that people tend to make serious changes in their lives every 7 years or so - as a couple you have to learn to grow together. Don't think that the person you're with today will be the same person 10 years from now - or vice versa. We all change.

When it comes to arguing - ask yourself "Is this the beach I want to die on" Chances are - it's not.

When you argue - never call each other names. It will destroy your relationship. Plain and simple. There's not a single successful healthy long term relationship that contains name calling when arguing.

Understand that your sex life will at times not be a significant part of your life - for various reasons.

Also understand that even if your partner doesn't have a high sex drive it doesn't mean that you can't masturbate - or that they wouldn't enjoy watching you do such.. who knows what it may spark

teasing is one thing - picking on a sensitive subject is another thing. Find out the difference for your partner.

you're going to at some point (probably multiple times during the course of the relationship) take each other for granted - it's a natural human condition. Talk to your partner if you feel that is happening.

Learn how to take constructive criticism.

Buy your partner small knickknack gifts randomly just for the hell of it. It lets them know you're thinking about them.

You and your partner should have this room in your relationship that no one else can go to. This is a figurative room - a room where you and he/she share each others secrets - a room where you talk to each other more than and about more subjects than you talk to anyone else. If you find yourself building a room with someone else - and starting to tell that person more than you tell your partner - you're asking for trouble. Serious trouble.

09-07-2011, 06:27 PM	#9
Tawse Member How Do You Identify?: TG Gender Queer Preferred Pronoun?: He Relationship Status: Married Join Date: Jun 2010 Location: Atlanta Posts: 730 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 2,973 Thanked 2,733 Times in 642 Posts Rep Power: 21474851	accept the fact that you're going to argue make an agreement that if the argument gets too passionate - you'll drop it so that both of you can calm down. make an agreement that the disagreement will be readdressed when both are in a better head space. understand that you both need to have your own life, you don't have to share every facet of your lives with each other. understand that there will be times where it will be much easier to walk away from each other than to stay and work it out - make an agreement that barring "deal breakers" you'll both strive as hard as possible to work it out. Remember that people tend to make serious changes in their lives every 7 years or so - as a couple you have to learn to grow together. Don't think that the person you're with today will be the same person 10 years from now - or vice versa. We all change. When it comes to arguing - ask yourself "Is this the beach I want to die on" Chances are - it's not. When you argue - never call each other names. It will destroy your relationship. Plain and simple. There's not a single successful healthy long term relationship that contains name calling when arguing. Understand that your sex life will at times not be a significant part of your life - for various reasons. Also understand that even if your partner doesn't have a high sex drive it doesn't mean that you can't masturbate - or that they wouldn't enjoy watching you do such.. who knows what it may spark teasing is one thing - picking on a sensitive subject is another thing. Find out the difference for your partner. you're going to at some point (probably multiple times during the course of the relationship) take each other for granted - it's a natural human condition. Talk to your partner if you feel that is happening. Learn how to take constructive criticism. Buy your partner small knickknack gifts randomly just for the hell of it. It lets them know you're thinking about them. You and your partner should have this room in your relationship that no one else can go to. This is a figurative room - a room where you and he/she share each others secrets - a room where you talk to each other more than and about more subjects than you talk to anyone else. If you find yourself building a room with someone else - and starting to tell that person more than you tell your partner - you're asking for trouble. Serious trouble.