Cancer Support and Caregivers Who Are Trail Blazers!

[JustJo]

Originally Posted by CatalinaRose

{{{{Jo}}}} I apologize in advance if this is none of my business, but since I am going through a similar situation with my father perhaps we can commiserate.

I finally realized after this last go around with my dad that I can't make him share with my siblings and I that which he himself cannot even come to terms with. I feel like I have been chasing him around the block since my mom died nearly three years ago and to be quite frank, I'm tired of it. Since I was a little girl I have had my dad on a pedestal I'm not all together sure he is deserved of, and I'm just now...at the age of 38...coming to this realization.

So, my decision is/was to not feed into his BS. I can love him to the moon and back and hope for the best but after all is said and done I can't make him better nor can I make him change his behavior or the way he fundamentally is as a human being. And I have finally come to a place of peace in my heart about this. Well, I still get teary at times over it all, but I have done all I can do and I know how bad it feels to bend over backwards for him and then get this passive/aggressive, shoulder-shrug response.

Hang in there! Are you still coming to AZ soon? xoxo

Thank you so much...and you're absolutely right. I'm just going to need to come to grips with the fact that this is how she is...and cancer doesn't change any of that, of course.

And, yes, I'm here now....just arrived late this afternoon, and just sent you a PM (great minds think alike ). I'm only here a few days, leaving early Thursday morning.