Loving a Transman Isn't Easy

[*Anya*]

Originally Posted by Miss Scarlett

I remember how I felt when my Beau told me that he is a Transman. It was about halfway into our first date and I was surprised but not unpleasantly. We were having such a wonderful time talking, laughing and getting to know each other that it just didn't matter at the time and it still doesn't matter.

I have many friends who happen to be Transgender but I've never dated a Transman before. He has many friends who happen to be lesbian but had never dated a lesbian, much less a Femme.

We've discussed, and I've been asked by friends, what that "makes" us as far as labels...straight, bi, etc. The answer to that question is that it makes him just him, me just me and us just us.

In other words, to us it just doesn't matter...period.

Let me add this...without divulging whether or not he has, is or is considering surgery, etc. (That's his private business. He is not a member of this site and I do not have his consent to share something so personal.) If he had, was or was considering transition, without hesitation I would support him 100%.

I am truly happy for you that you found your beau.

This thread was quite a while ago but I think the difference is that the OP fell in love with a female-bodied/ identified butch and during their relationship, her lover came out as Trans.

The posts read as this was a surprise, shock and a sense of loss for her.

Your beau had knew this information about his transition and shared it with you during your first date. It was a wonderful thing that he already knew this when he began to date you and that he immediately shared it with you half-way through that first date.

I don't know what I personally would do if a year into my relationship my female-identified butch came out as trans and was going to go on T.

Even though I love her dearly, it would be very, very difficult for me.

Again, I am so happy for you. It is lovely to read of the joy you are feeling in your posts!

Best wishes, always. ❤️