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Old 09-22-2010, 01:25 PM   #8
Isadora
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Although, unlike Diva, I do not forget or forgive easily, I try hard not to feel guilty about it because in some ways it has fueled my activism in anti-violence, domestic violence and sexual assault survivor work.

Irish said:
"Also, I have this little hang up about forgiveness..you have to apologize and actually mean it. To me, that means not repeating the same behavior. And please, do not try to coddle me with an " I"m sorry you were hurt by ..." or.." I"m sorry you took it that way". That's not an apology. That is putting it on my doorstep."

I have sought and sincerely apologized for the behavior I was truly sorry for committing. I will not seek it for what I am not sorry for...like everyone said it would not be sincere and that is also hard to forgive. I remember one apology I got was a cell phone message that basically said "My Mistress said I should apologize to you." *laughs* Not even an apology.

I also would add to it "You really should not take it personally." Huh? Um, how ever should I take it? It is personal, everything is personal. I was hurt! I was lied to and about! I was beat! I was made to look crazy! It was very personal.

Again, this is one of my most vulnerable spots. One I constantly work on... *le sigh*
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