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Old 03-01-2011, 09:12 PM   #11
key
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androgynous, gender-queer, butch
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merrily single hopefully married one day
 

Join Date: Jan 2010
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Default Want to add my own little quandary

I can be so clueless sometimes. And I miss opportunities. This frustrates me.

Today's example:

Coming home from work, tired, a bit disheveled. Just thinking about dinner and a hot bath. As I am getting my two dogs out of the truck, I see a veeeery cuuuute woman unloading a u-haul truck. I am so ...? I honestly don't know (shy, clueless, ?) I barely even look her way. She stops what she is doing and smiles at me. I smile and say hi, then realize I forgot something in the truck, go back and get it. As I head towards home again she is still standing there smiling. I say hi again (dork?) as we walk past her.

It does not dawn on me until I am in the bath that she had stopped what she was doing and was smiling at me. Who knows, maybe she was just tired and taking a break. Maybe she liked my dogs. Maybe her face is stuck in a smile naturally. But maybe, just maybe she was open to me saying something more than hi. Maybe something like welcome to the neighborhood? Maybe I will get another chance if I can even remember what she looked like. UGH!

This is just today's example. I feel like my cluelessness makes me completely oblivious to these types of situations/opportunities in the moment. It is only after the fact that I sometimes get it.

Can anyone relate?
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