Reclaiming Lesbian Pride

[Heart]

On the other hand -- the transwomen that I know personally grew up living in fear. They were not socialized as girls, they had access to boy/male privilege, but because of their internal wiring, they knew early that they were "counterfit" and therefore at risk. And they also internalized self-blame, not in the same way as girls, but as "others," as queers, as being different. It's not easy to belong to the privileged class (boys/men), and know that you don't "measure up," especially when you know that the consequences for that can be harsh, (for a large group of transwomen, that translates as rape). This feels important to me, in part because of the work I have done with transwomen survivors.

But. It doesn't mean that one should not be held accountable for their actions. One of the problems with individualizing these issues (i.e. some people are just jerks, there are assholes in every group, etc) is that when someone is called out on their inappropriate behavior, they evoke their status as part of an oppressed group, and then become untouchable. They shift the focus away from their behavior and onto others' behavior as "oppressors." Classic. And dangerous. I see too much of that. And I tend to agree with Cheryl, that women and lesbians stand to lose the most in that game.

What it brings me back to is something I've talked about before -- the importance of coalescing around shared values and goals, rather than just shared identities.

Heart