"You should grow your hair out longer" lol

Words · 03-01-2012, 04:31 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Cuddles

I've gotten two compliments on my haircut from random strangers this week. I'm used to a few compliments here and there.... and then there's my coworker this week who's a sweet, korean lady about 25 years older than me. I laughed cause she said, "You should grow your hair out longer, I like longer hair. Grow it out please!".

She's too sweet and too naive for me to get into a discussion about what being butch is all about. She's the kind of woman that hears a curse word from someone and audibly gasps in horror.

Still... she's quirky and fun and I'm cool with it lol. Just sharing randomness lol.

Being butch is all about having short hair?

Oh boy, are you setting yourself up for some ass whooping. LOL...

Words

boobookitty · 03-01-2012, 04:54 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Words

Being butch is all about having short hair?

Oh boy, are you setting yourself up for some ass whooping. LOL...

Words

LOL... I am smiling and laughing-- My natural hair is LONG, like 36 inches long.
I wear wigs for a short hair 'look'... I posted a picture of me with a very short wig on FB and I had 3 emails then a phone call... all to find out if I had really cut my hair. 'NO' LOL... when Betty Boop, Mrs. Brady, June Cleaver (Leave it to Beaver) and the Mom, from Father Knows Best. (the list could go on forever)
All become butch icons, then maybe... MAYBE, ... short hair will make someone butch.

Random · 03-01-2012, 05:12 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Words

Being butch is all about having short hair?

Oh boy, are you setting yourself up for some ass whooping. LOL...

Words

LOL

I was sort of thinking the same thing...

Cause this femme like the #3 guard on her clippers and don't forget the neck... While her butch wears her hair just about to the middle of her back... (when I'm not cutting on it..heheh)

But the sun is shining, I'm not at work, and I understood that the butch in question was talking about what is butch for her/him....

ButchEire · 03-01-2012, 05:18 PM

I have extremely short hair but it has nothing to do with my identity. I simply hate having more than the minimum amount of hair.

funkyfemme · 03-01-2012, 05:42 PM

I prefer short hair on a butch but if they can rock the longer hair then, yeah, go for it. Anything but the Mullet, please. I just cannot handle the Mulls.

WolfyOne · 03-01-2012, 05:53 PM

Wow, this thread certainly caught my attention, especially the OP

I have no words to describe what is playing in my mind right now

Will I lose my butch card for having long hair?

Cuddles · 03-01-2012, 05:55 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by WolfyOne

Wow, this thread certainly caught my attention, especially the OP

I have no words to describe what is playing in my mind right now

Will I lose my butch card for having long hair?

No and you should all not take what I said personal either. It was a comment directed at me about a random encounter with my co-worker.

macele · 03-01-2012, 06:20 PM

thank you, cuddles. for sharing with us. always. i love a sense of humor.

1QuirkyKiwi · 03-02-2012, 10:11 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by funkyfemme

Anything but the Mullet, please. I just cannot handle the Mulls.

Yeah! What Funky Femme said! LOL!

Apart from the awful (sorry Belle) Mullet, I don't mind how a Butch has hys/her hair; the hair doesn't make the Butch! Besides, I like to run my fingers through hys/her hair.

vixenagogo · 03-01-2012, 05:43 PM

do we really *always* have to split hairs?

Jess · 03-01-2012, 05:49 PM

workin on a combover.. back to front... grinz

Cuddles · 03-01-2012, 05:52 PM

I should have said "what being butch is all about TO ME (as in my personal preference for ME)"... my apologies.

apretty · 03-01-2012, 06:36 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Words

Being butch is all about having short hair?

Oh boy, are you setting yourself up for some ass whooping. LOL...

Words

I didn't read the OP as stating that being butch is all about... short hair--I did read her as saying that she didn't want to have a conversation with a co-worker about what *butch* means.

Am I way off?

Cuddles · 03-01-2012, 06:45 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by apretty

I didn't read the OP as stating that being butch is all about... short hair--I did read her as saying that she didn't want to have a conversation with a co-worker about what *butch* means.

Am I way off?

No, thank you.. you're not. My coworker doesn't know what butch is, I'm guessing but I'm betting I'm right. I didn't want to explain it to her.

I am not, nor have I ever, thought of only short hair as butch. I think it's silly to even assume I would think that.

It makes me cringe to post on forums sometimes because it's easy to take other's words out of context or twist them around when all they were doing was talking like they would to a friend standing next to them.

Sorry if I offended anyone, I'll be more careful about my choice of words in the future if needed.

Julie · 03-01-2012, 06:53 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Cuddles

No, thank you.. you're not. My coworker doesn't know what butch is, I'm guessing but I'm betting I'm right. I didn't want to explain it to her.

I am not, nor have I ever, thought of only short hair as butch. I think it's silly to even assume I would think that.

It makes me cringe to post on forums sometimes because it's easy to take other's words out of context or twist them around when all they were doing was talking like they would to a friend standing next to them.

Sorry if I offended anyone, I'll be more careful about my choice of words in the future if needed.

No offense... I can will tell you this -- As a femme, I have heard over and over again from Butches, that I would look oh so much more Feminine if only I would grow out my hair. That Femme's should not have short hair. Or GASP... It's just not right that your hair is shorter than mine.

Sorry, if you felt your words were being twisted not my intent. AND... I work for a Japanese organization and will say this, based on my experience in Japan and working with people in this culture. Hair is very important. Long hair on females is a sign of femininity. It is cultural.. As it is cultural in many of the Asian (continent) cultures.

Julie

Cuddles · 03-01-2012, 07:01 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Julie

AND... I work for a Japanese organization and will say this, based on my experience in Japan and working with people in this culture. Hair is very important. Long hair on females is a sign of femininity. It is cultural.. As it is cultural in many of the Asian (continent) cultures.

Julie

That was sort of the moral of my sharing this... it was amusing to me how much my short hair bothered her because she didn't get it. She tsk'ed me when I told her I would not grow it out lol. I wish I could capture the sweet, quirkyness of this woman in words but alas, I cannot.

Thank you for understanding.

BullDog · 03-01-2012, 07:07 PM

I do think what Cuddles and Julie are sharing are actually very similar even though one is butch and one is femme- both are being told they should grow their hair out because that is considered more feminine (what a woman should be).

Corkey · 03-01-2012, 07:12 PM

Being that it is a cultural thing for some I'm not surprised at all. I took the post as a random thought. Psst there's a thread for that too LOL.

princessbelle · 03-01-2012, 07:21 PM

Not to get off topic, but it is off topic.

I was wondering when the whole "short hair for masculine, long hair for feminine" sort of ideals come from to begin with.

I found this...

For much of human history, both men and women had long hair, and men usually had long beards as well. In the 4th century BC Alexander the Great of Macedonia had his soldiers wear short hair and shave off their beards, so that their ememies couldn't grab their hair or beards in battle. The Romans were the first culture where all the men generally wore their hair short and shaved their beards, again for military reasons. After Rome conquered most of Europe and the Mediterranean, short hair came to be associated with what Rome stood for: civilization, "law and order", loyalty to the state, conservatism, military discipline, etc. Long hair was associated with barbarians, women, "effeminate" greek philosophers and wimpy romantics. The Roman senate took a dim view of emperors like Hadrian who "went Greek" by wearing a beard and longer hair.

At answer bag.com

For what it's worth.

I was just curious...didn't mean to derail really.

Personal note: Also, i can speak from my *me* space and say...i have long hair, always have and it has nothing to do with me being feminine. I just have a long neck and with short hair i look like a giraffe. And, well, i'd rather not.

SugarFemme · 03-01-2012, 07:12 PM

So much of what "we" do as a society is sadly based on stereotypes. And the stereotype exists that butches have short hair and femmes have long hair. It's been perpetuated for so long that people forget that hair is not what defines a person. I have worn my hair short my entire life until I decided to grow it long two years ago. I consider myself very femme, even when my hair is short. Although I present on the OUTSIDE to be femme....it is what's inside my heart and soul that truly makes me feminine. How I think. How I go about my life. How I see things. All this is how I define ME and no one else.

03-01-2012, 05:53 PM	#6
WolfyOne Magically Delicious How Do You Identify?: Gentle Butch Relationship Status: Single and content Join Date: Nov 2009 Location: Minnesota Posts: 6,558 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 22,052 Thanked 15,392 Times in 4,138 Posts Rep Power: 21474858	Wow, this thread certainly caught my attention, especially the OP I have no words to describe what is playing in my mind right now Will I lose my butch card for having long hair? __________________ Being deeply loved by someone gives you strength; loving someone deeply gives you courage --- Lao Tzo

03-01-2012, 05:43 PM	#10
vixenagogo Member How Do You Identify?: unabashedly femme! Preferred Pronoun?: i prefer being proadverb. Relationship Status: single. Join Date: Nov 2009 Location: detroitrockcity. Posts: 1,137 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 1,139 Thanked 1,257 Times in 380 Posts Rep Power: 21474853	lather.rinse.repeat. do we really always have to split hairs?

03-01-2012, 07:07 PM	#17
BullDog Infamous Member How Do You Identify?: Dominant Stone Butch Daddy Preferred Pronoun?: She Join Date: Nov 2009 Location: In A Healing Place Posts: 5,371 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 18,160 Thanked 22,655 Times in 4,463 Posts Rep Power: 21474856	I do think what Cuddles and Julie are sharing are actually very similar even though one is butch and one is femme- both are being told they should grow their hair out because that is considered more feminine (what a woman should be). __________________ Love consists in this, that two solitudes protect and touch and greet each other. - Rainer Maria Rilke

03-01-2012, 07:12 PM	#18
Corkey Infamous Member How Do You Identify?: Human Preferred Pronoun?: He Relationship Status: Very Married Join Date: Dec 2009 Location: Where I want to be Posts: 8,155 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 47,491 Thanked 29,268 Times in 6,637 Posts Rep Power: 21474859	Being that it is a cultural thing for some I'm not surprised at all. I took the post as a random thought. Psst there's a thread for that too LOL. __________________ "Many proposals have been made to us to adopt your laws, your religion, your manners and your customs. We would be better pleased with beholding the good effects of these doctrines in your own practices, than with hearing you talk about them". ~Old Tassel, Chief of the Tsalagi (Cherokee)

03-01-2012, 07:21 PM	#19
princessbelle Infamous Member How Do You Identify?: femme Preferred Pronoun?: femme ones Join Date: Nov 2009 Location: Tennessee Posts: 6,100 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 29,380 Thanked 30,496 Times in 5,198 Posts Rep Power: 21474858	Not to get off topic, but it is off topic. I was wondering when the whole "short hair for masculine, long hair for feminine" sort of ideals come from to begin with. I found this... For much of human history, both men and women had long hair, and men usually had long beards as well. In the 4th century BC Alexander the Great of Macedonia had his soldiers wear short hair and shave off their beards, so that their ememies couldn't grab their hair or beards in battle. The Romans were the first culture where all the men generally wore their hair short and shaved their beards, again for military reasons. After Rome conquered most of Europe and the Mediterranean, short hair came to be associated with what Rome stood for: civilization, "law and order", loyalty to the state, conservatism, military discipline, etc. Long hair was associated with barbarians, women, "effeminate" greek philosophers and wimpy romantics. The Roman senate took a dim view of emperors like Hadrian who "went Greek" by wearing a beard and longer hair. At answer bag.com For what it's worth. I was just curious...didn't mean to derail really. Personal note: Also, i can speak from my me space and say...i have long hair, always have and it has nothing to do with me being feminine. I just have a long neck and with short hair i look like a giraffe. And, well, i'd rather not. __________________ ~ I've learned that people will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel. ~ Maya Angelou

03-01-2012, 05:18 PM	#4
ButchEire Timed Out How Do You Identify?: Permanent ban 3/17/2013 - TROLL Relationship Status: Partner to my best friend Join Date: Jun 2010 Location: For now, Buffalo Posts: 701 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 1,618 Thanked 1,872 Times in 485 Posts Rep Power: 0	I have extremely short hair but it has nothing to do with my identity. I simply hate having more than the minimum amount of hair.

03-01-2012, 05:42 PM	#5
funkyfemme Timed Out How Do You Identify?: Gamey as Fuck Relationship Status: I move from person to person real quick. Join Date: Jan 2011 Location: A sad little town Posts: 800 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 5,059 Thanked 2,824 Times in 662 Posts Rep Power: 0	I prefer short hair on a butch but if they can rock the longer hair then, yeah, go for it. Anything but the Mullet, please. I just cannot handle the Mulls.

03-01-2012, 06:20 PM	#8
macele Member How Do You Identify?: a bold-assed maximus Preferred Pronoun?: she Join Date: Sep 2011 Location: mississippi Posts: 1,066 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 3,178 Thanked 3,230 Times in 847 Posts Rep Power: 21474850	thank you, cuddles. for sharing with us. always. i love a sense of humor.

03-01-2012, 05:49 PM	#11
Jess Timed Out - Permanent How Do You Identify?: decidedly indifferent Preferred Pronoun?: other Join Date: Nov 2009 Location: Patrick Springs, VA Posts: 2,812 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 9,247 Thanked 5,700 Times in 1,682 Posts Rep Power: 0	workin on a combover.. back to front... grinz

03-01-2012, 05:52 PM	#12
Cuddles Junior Member How Do You Identify?: A romantic butch who loves to cuddle... and steal your french fry when you're not looking! Preferred Pronoun?: No preference. Relationship Status: Single, always looking to mingle and maybe be tamed one day Join Date: Feb 2012 Location: Northern Florida Posts: 61 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 117 Thanked 191 Times in 36 Posts Rep Power: 1805812	I should have said "what being butch is all about TO ME (as in my personal preference for ME)"... my apologies.

03-01-2012, 07:12 PM	#20
SugarFemme Member How Do You Identify?: Fierce Femme Preferred Pronoun?: She Relationship Status: Singular Join Date: Oct 2011 Location: Southwest Posts: 1,029 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 650 Thanked 4,460 Times in 854 Posts Rep Power*: 21474851	So much of what "we" do as a society is sadly based on stereotypes. And the stereotype exists that butches have short hair and femmes have long hair. It's been perpetuated for so long that people forget that hair is not what defines a person. I have worn my hair short my entire life until I decided to grow it long two years ago. I consider myself very femme, even when my hair is short. Although I present on the OUTSIDE to be femme....it is what's inside my heart and soul that truly makes me feminine. How I think. How I go about my life. How I see things. All this is how I define ME and no one else.

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