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Old 10-23-2012, 10:26 AM   #9
princessbelle
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OMG i was so screwed up with my BF preference and absolutely no clue how that could become a literal life or what it all meant.

I was not attracted to girls and i was not attracted to boys at a young age.

The first boy that put his arm around me, in kindergarten, i punched him. Not because i felt boys were icky exactly, it's because i remember thinking "i wish you were a girl". I was more confused than you can imagine. I would go along with the girls who would squeal over this boy or that. But, always knew something wasn't exactly "normal" with me.

As time went on, i started noticing, by middle school, that all of my best friends were tomboys. I even took up sports to be around them. I finally figured out i could be a cheerleader, because i could still be an athlete without having to run across a soccer field and be the worst player.

The first inkling that i remember that i may be gay was in the 7th grade. One of my closest friends was Sherry (who did come out as a lesbian later in life and has been with her partner over 20 years, last i heard). Real tomboy, rough and tough, carried a switchblade. LOL so damn cute i swear. I did not come from a really rough school, but she thought it was cool. Guess what...So did i.

One day she said to me in the bus room..."When you look at me like that, you make my stomach wiggle and i feel like a boy". That was a pivotal moment for me, and most likely for her too.

We had definite separation of kids in my high school. We had the nerds, the athletes, the hoods (toughies), the scholars, ect. I was, by default, in the athletic group due to cheerleading. But, most of my best friends, tomboys, were hoods. Many of these friends did come out as being gay later. I was sorta their mascot in a way. They would come to football games and after the game was over i would leave with them and we would go smoke ciggerettes (ahem). This would piss my other "goodie goodie" friends off. So i was sorta an outcast with them at times.

Anyway, baby BFers are cute as all get out. I love these stories and thinking back and the light bulb moments...

Great thread.
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