Are butches really a dying breed?

[Sun]

Originally Posted by Angeltoes

Based on what I've read, 12% of the population is gay..maybe that's wrong, but based on that say half of that is lesbian and we're talking about 6% of population. How much of that percentage even ascribes to the butch/femme dynamic...? Even if you say half, that's 3%, half femme and half butch, so 1.5% of the population is butch...in America? How many of those butches live in Boise, Idaho?

*crickets* Not very many.

Maybe the lesbian population is larger than that, but it seems to me that most women are looking for someone to join them and their man in a threeway. On this site we have lots of dreamy people, but in Boise I don't see butches looking for femmes for romance and commitment.

You are right, the Butch Femme world can appear to be very small. Even in some urban area's the number of people who "get" the dynamic can be few and far between.

I want to speak to your comment on people looking for romance and a commitment. My experience is that the "right" person can be anywhere. You will hear me tell friends to stay open to meeting someone who they have a spark with and not to let location stand in the way. Sure, some people think that is just crazy but if someone is serious, and really wants to get to know you, they will move heaven and earth to do so.

There are many people that have done just that. Some folks are not tied to location and can relocate to pursue a relationship if it seems like the right thing to do. Life is short and we do not always get the chance to meet someone wonderful in our backyard. Sometimes it requires moving 3,000 miles away and starting over. That is what risk is all about and in matters of romance and commitment, risk is a given.

So please do not lose hope that someone is out there for you. The wonderful thing about this community is, as you say, there are dreamy people here who have already taken a risk just by being here and letting us see a little bit of who they are.

The numbers are just numbers. You have a lot more than numbers all around you.