Lesbian Couple "Looks into Transgender" as a Loophole to Get Married

[aishah]

i can see all sides of this - i think the arguments for why this may be deeper than it initially appears are pretty compelling.

that said, i know of transfolks who've faced charges of fraud in certain areas of the country for legitimately having gender identity disorder, transitioning, and then marrying someone under the law, without any discussion of doing it for the "loophole," just straight up fraud even though their gender was changed on their identity documents.

as much drama has been caused for people who definitely identify as trans and who medically transition and then choose to get married, it makes me wonder if this couple aren't opening themselves up even moreso to potential charges of fraud? the state has no problem getting into folks' marriages where this is concerned. people get charged with marriage fraud for this, for marrying for immigration reasons, etc. i'm afraid i find the legal implications of this more disturbing than the relational ones.

i also agree with words and dykeumentary who've pointed out that regardless of whether one agrees with the actions, what's really at fault here is a state and a social system that defines marriage in such a fucked up, narrow way as to even make this situation possible.

(also thanks dykeumentary for putting words to the ableism of casual comments about people's mental health states. it upset me too.)

[Kobi]

aishah raises an important point. The issues are deeper and more complex.

But it behooves us to look at the larger picture as well.

I checked various news sources on this story. The majority did not affix a label to this couple. They were simply referred to as a couple....not a lesbian couple, not a same sex couple, just a couple.

This is huge.

We have been trained to understand the word "loophole" as meaning something bad, something nefarious, something exploitative.

Using something that exists in a way different from what was originally intended is not a bad thing.

Remember, it was a "loophole" in the laws of the Commonwealth of Massachusetts that spurred gay marriage to a reality in this country.

Some might even say it was a "loophole" for people with the breast cancer gene to have their top surgery covered by insurance under the guise of preventative health.

Looking at something with a fresh set of eyes has led to many positive changes.

It also is imperative for us to remember that even tho we use an umbrella to describe ourselves, the rain doesnt effect us all equally.

Like it or not, the reality is, in a predominately hetero appearing society, regardless of how we get there, male-female couplings lead to instantaneous rights and privileges.

Same sex couples have made inroads but we do not have the same rights and privileges across the board. We still face an uphill battle for equity on local, state, and federal levels.

Equity will come when marriage is just marriage. As long as a distinction is made for same sex or gay marriage, there will be inequality. On the most basic of levels, do bakeries refuse to make wedding cakes for couples they perceive to be hetero?

Because of our differences we might have the need to pull this apart, and to analyze it based on our own political leanings and interests. Perfectly understandable cuz it does mean something different to different groups overall.

Yet, I havent seen anything in these stories about this couple that says they were disingenuous to their authentic selves. That says a lot to me.