Bed Side Preference and Dominance

[The_Lady_Snow]

Originally Posted by MasterfulButch

In my experience to date, I've noticed a correlation between dominance and bed side preference. That is, where there is a dominant character in a pairing (not necessarily dominant as a sexual identity) that they prefer to sleep on the right hand side of the bed.

Has anyone else noticed anything similar? Does the theory fit you?

Do you know a lot of Dom/Dommes/Tops/Dominants/Masters who prefer a the right side of the bed? I display myself via flagging when out and about sometimes to let people know the dynamic, and left is Dominant, how did the right side get picked as the dominant side? How was it assigned? I am asking because I have never deconstructed my bed before as far as how I identify or am.. So I have been thinking and thinking about it and had the questions above, I may have more because things like this make me think...

Happy New Year!

[Corkey]

Left side, closest to the door, closest to the bathroom, closest to the 2nd set of windows, closest to the heater, closest to the fan, closest to the scratching board for the cat and last but not least closest the the back door, in case of emergency. I don't think personally given all of the above it is a dominant thing as much as my wife lets me thing.... and I'm the Dom.

[EnchantedNightDweller]

My guy can have whichever side of the bed he wants.

[Bard]

I usually sleep nearest to the door. But tend to roll to my left side now that my shoulder allows it. But really if she wanted that side I can be persuaded. I have always preferred to be near the door. . Just in case ya know the only time I wasn't was in our old apartment strange.. ahh well

[Kätzchen]

My preference for a social life in bed centers primarily upon getting some rest (sleep). If it also includes a delicious variety of entanglements , then I would feel delightfully content.

[Femmadian]

Dominant and a right side sleeper here.

I would say that the right side-dominant and left side-submissive thing has borne out for about 70% of my experiences if I look back. Then again, maybe I'm just a stubborn ass when it comes to the bed side. Who knows?

So, I sleep on the right side of the bed (along the edge), on my right side, and usually with my right arm up and under the pillow in a sort of modified Superman pose. I'm also right handed. I wonder if hand dominance factors in as well...?

For me, sleeping on the right side of my body is most important overall, especially when sharing the bed with someone. If I'm spooning someone while falling asleep, I prefer to be on my right. If I'm being spooned, I still prefer to be on my right. If I'm cuddling up to their chest while they're on their back or we're intertwined while facing each other, still the right side preference remains. Anything else just feels awkward and uncomfortable.

I don't care if I'm by the door or not. If you want to sleep on the side closest to the door because you feel protective about it or something, that's fine... as long as it's on the left side.

I also can't sleep by the wall if the bed is pushed up against it. I will, without fail, end up kicking it throughout the night, usually followed by a somewhat delayed "ow" muttered under my breath as my sleepy brain takes a moment to register the shooting pain in my foot. I usually like to dangle one foot slightly over the edge which is impossible to do when it's pushed up against the wall (though it doesn't stop me from trying, apparently!).

I really do have a hard time sleeping on the left and especially when in a new environment with a partner. It's to the point that I'm often not even able to fall asleep if I'm "left on the left." Resting on my right side when on the left side of the mattress feels like I'm getting a face full of bed when I sleep... slightly suffocating and I feel trapped. I wish that wasn't the case (because it's really annoying!) but my body just won't relax enough in those scenarios to fall asleep.

Now, once I'm asleep, that's a different story. I've always been a notoriously deep sleeper. Growing up, it was a daily ordeal for my family to wake me up for school in the morning. They either had to resort to jumping up and down on the bed and over my comatose body (which would usually take a minute or two to take effect) or they would employ a "release the hounds!" approach and let the dog(s) in to get them excited and have them jumping all over me instead. Seemed to do the trick. I am totally that person who has to set at least five alarms on her phone because I will usually sleep/snooze through the first four (at least!). So, once I'm out, I'm out. I once joked to a partner who also liked to sleep on the right (who was slightly dominant, or at least tried to be... ) that I needed to be on the right side to fall asleep but that once I was there you could probably move me in my sleep and I wouldn't notice. Well, that morning I woke up and I was mysteriously laying on the left side of the bed and they were sleeping soundly on the right! They had moved me in the night and I didn't even notice.

So, I guess if my partner has a really strong preference for the right as well, they could always just stay awake and try something like that...? That said, I'm also the owliest of night owls so I will probably just end up outlasting you anyway.

[QueenofSmirks]

Originally Posted by Femmadian

...
So, I sleep on the right side of the bed (along the edge), on my right side, and usually with my right arm up and under the pillow in a sort of modified Superman pose. I'm also right handed. ...

Me too, exactly as you described... about 90% of the time. About 10% of the time I find myself in some other random position, but not often.

However, if I'm in someone else's bed, I defer to them on whichever side they want to sleep on. I'm well aware that many people have sleep issues, and I want everyone to be comfortable in their own bed. I sleep better when I'm alone, in my own bed. When I travel, I rarely sleep well; when I'm in someone else's bed, I wake up every couple of hours.