Body Image Issues

[Darth Denkay]

Many of you spoke of body image issues spanning years. That isn't quite my experience. Except for a time a couple years ago when I did lose a decent amount of weight, ever since I've been an adult I've been heavy. Not extremely overweight, fluctuating between 30 and 70 pounds heavier than where I should be. For most of that time I would have preferred to not be as heavy, but I don't think it was really a body image thing - more like I'd be happy to lose the weight but it wasn't a focus of my life. I don't know why but over the last year or so that has shifted. I'm self-conscious about my weight now, I hate to see a reflection of myself, I wonder what others think. I've tried to talking to my partner but because she also has self image concerns it makes her wonder how I can be attracted to her if I'm not happy with my weight. I get that. It's true though that she is beautiful - for me her weight is not an issue, but I am unhappy about mine. I doubt this is terribly unusual. Other than with her though, I don't think I've really shared this with anyone. Like I said, sort of new territory for me.