Poly Relationships

Lady_Wu · 05-09-2010, 12:12 PM

I am in a polyandrous (two masculine people) marriage. This took us a long time to work out. Both "men" -one a FtM, the other a Karma male, hard to explain but not male in body-are intensely possessive. We were involved in a long term relationship for 4 years. Then X disappeared, leaving J and me bewildered and grieving. When he reappeared, we talked about what we wanted in life. They decided together that what each wanted was MY happiness. Since I loved and had loved both of them for a long time, they got together, drew up a Taoist/Confucian marriage contract and presented it to me. When I read it, I was thrilled. It was what I had wanted for all of my life. I in essence belong to each of them. The only thing I can do the would invalidate the marriage (witnessed and contracted by a Zen Priest) will be to go outside the marriage to another person. I am extremely happy. I am Empress of the household. They are supportive of each other and good friends. We live together in a small house. I would say that communication, respect for each other, clear boundaries, kindness, and love (in this case love for me) are paramount in keeping this marriage working. We are all happy with our decision and expect to be together for the rest of our lives. X is the eldest of us but in the best health; J is in his mid-fifties, and I am in my late 40s. They are the reason I remain in WV. I love both so dearly that I think that I would, and almost have, grieve to death without each of them. We have been together for almost 6 years now. This is rather unusual in that it is a polyandrous (2"men") rather than a polygamous (2 or more women) marriage. I feel extremely lucky in having the love of two such extraordinary "men". I am loved, cherished, and protected. Each would gladly die for me, and I for them. This is our life.
Lady_Wu, Kikkion to the Yellow Emperor and to the Lin.

JustAGirl · 07-14-2010, 10:23 PM

Wow, LadyWu! As a lover of man in general, my first though in mind (as I ingest and contemplate this thread) is how "the norm" view poly relationships i.e. it's almost every man's dream to have 2 girls sexually accessible...

I just wonder (if in poly relationships) if things turn territorial in other poly relationships. For instance, I can't sleep/fuck there if I know my lover has been in the bed with another. :/ Too close to "home" baby.

The older I get the more I can separate love and sex...

casey35 · 08-22-2010, 12:02 PM

In 6 days i will be welcoming my new lover in to our house( my partner and I). This will be a totally new experience for us, figuring out the boundries of each and making sure no feelings are hurt. I have talk to several people on this situation and how they dealt with things . So hoping with all my heart we have a very loving home.

PearlsNLace · 08-22-2010, 12:21 PM

Paphigleo and I went into our relationship together knowing it will not allways be a monogomous one. We both are hoping to find a butch who is into both butches and femmes, well, who would be into both of US, at some point. But maybe it wont work that way, in a neat little triad. Perhaps there will come a time where Paphigleo will have a boi, and that individual will NOT be "into" me, or I them. I think what we are creating now, together, is solid. And it needs to be. For that kind of open honesty takes some serious work internally. It takes trust in ourselves as well as each other. I love what we have now, I think it is what makes us strong enough to add all that comes with having another intimate person in our lives.

05-09-2010, 12:12 PM	#1
Lady_Wu Member How Do You Identify?: OFOS Queer Stone femme Preferred Pronoun?: M'Lady Relationship Status: given up looking sigh Join Date: Apr 2010 Location: somewhere buried under a pile of books Posts: 197 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 285 Thanked 300 Times in 105 Posts Rep Power: 155956	I'll jump in.... I am in a polyandrous (two masculine people) marriage. This took us a long time to work out. Both "men" -one a FtM, the other a Karma male, hard to explain but not male in body-are intensely possessive. We were involved in a long term relationship for 4 years. Then X disappeared, leaving J and me bewildered and grieving. When he reappeared, we talked about what we wanted in life. They decided together that what each wanted was MY happiness. Since I loved and had loved both of them for a long time, they got together, drew up a Taoist/Confucian marriage contract and presented it to me. When I read it, I was thrilled. It was what I had wanted for all of my life. I in essence belong to each of them. The only thing I can do the would invalidate the marriage (witnessed and contracted by a Zen Priest) will be to go outside the marriage to another person. I am extremely happy. I am Empress of the household. They are supportive of each other and good friends. We live together in a small house. I would say that communication, respect for each other, clear boundaries, kindness, and love (in this case love for me) are paramount in keeping this marriage working. We are all happy with our decision and expect to be together for the rest of our lives. X is the eldest of us but in the best health; J is in his mid-fifties, and I am in my late 40s. They are the reason I remain in WV. I love both so dearly that I think that I would, and almost have, grieve to death without each of them. We have been together for almost 6 years now. This is rather unusual in that it is a polyandrous (2"men") rather than a polygamous (2 or more women) marriage. I feel extremely lucky in having the love of two such extraordinary "men". I am loved, cherished, and protected. Each would gladly die for me, and I for them. This is our life. Lady_Wu, Kikkion to the Yellow Emperor and to the Lin. __________________ I'm the Yin in the Yang and the Yang in the Yin.

07-14-2010, 10:23 PM	#2
JustAGirl Junior Member How Do You Identify?: gay Preferred Pronoun?: she Relationship Status: he makes me say wow Join Date: Jul 2010 Location: . Posts: 9 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 4 Thanked 5 Times in 4 Posts Rep Power: 0	wow Wow, LadyWu! As a lover of man in general, my first though in mind (as I ingest and contemplate this thread) is how "the norm" view poly relationships i.e. it's almost every man's dream to have 2 girls sexually accessible... I just wonder (if in poly relationships) if things turn territorial in other poly relationships. For instance, I can't sleep/fuck there if I know my lover has been in the bed with another. :/ Too close to "home" baby. The older I get the more I can separate love and sex...

08-22-2010, 12:02 PM	#3
casey35 Junior Member How Do You Identify?: femme Preferred Pronoun?: a she Relationship Status: finding my way , Join Date: Jan 2010 Location: arkansas Posts: 74 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 2 Thanked 108 Times in 32 Posts Rep Power: 859274	a new start In 6 days i will be welcoming my new lover in to our house( my partner and I). This will be a totally new experience for us, figuring out the boundries of each and making sure no feelings are hurt. I have talk to several people on this situation and how they dealt with things . So hoping with all my heart we have a very loving home. __________________

08-22-2010, 12:21 PM	#4
PearlsNLace Member How Do You Identify?: queer Preferred Pronoun?: They/Them & her/she Relationship Status: Lucky, very lucky Join Date: Nov 2009 Location: Portlandia, Oregon Posts: 427 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 875 Thanked 1,286 Times in 315 Posts Rep Power: 6505517	Paphigleo and I went into our relationship together knowing it will not allways be a monogomous one. We both are hoping to find a butch who is into both butches and femmes, well, who would be into both of US, at some point. But maybe it wont work that way, in a neat little triad. Perhaps there will come a time where Paphigleo will have a boi, and that individual will NOT be "into" me, or I them. I think what we are creating now, together, is solid. And it needs to be. For that kind of open honesty takes some serious work internally. It takes trust in ourselves as well as each other. I love what we have now, I think it is what makes us strong enough to add all that comes with having another intimate person in our lives.