OMG! I Am SOOOOOOO EMBARRASSED!

StoneFinn · 05-10-2010, 09:15 AM

So, I was taking her out for dinner for the first time. I was still young and wearing a wallet chain. Not just a "wallet chain" but the Old School Industrial-Punk Wallet Chain. Nice, solid heavy links... what hung in a nice drape... down to my knee.

I held her chair out for her, tucking her in as she sat. I took my seat across from her, and we ordered. I was terribly nervous. I decided that I *needed* to go wash my hands-- anything to settle my nerves down a bit. I excuse myself, and get up from my chair.

The washroom is across the dining room, but I have to go around the table and go by her chair to head toward the door. So, I get up, and with much more "intent" or "focus" than I thought that I was putting in to it, I move to head towards the washroom.......

except...

my Screw-The-Establishment-Walletchain has hooked on to a rather solid part of her chair unbeknownst to me, and with the speed and finesse of a magician pulling the tablecloth out from underneath the crystal-- I yank her chair right out from underneath her, and take it with me for about 2 to 3 steps before I realise just what has happened.

I apparently turned so red that I was purple, and that I believe that so much blood was going into me blushing that I have no memory of what happened next.

(apparently, though, she forgave me... and considered me "endearing" as that wasn't our only date! lol )

(oh, and no-- no more walletchains.)

lyric · 05-10-2010, 12:03 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by ToXiC

-looks around to see if lyric is watching-

Holy hell... yes, I'm watching. God, that sounds bad!

I got a kick out of teasing you... which I thought was pretty funny because the no eye contact thing was either cute... or very, very weird. However, it wasn't nearly as funny after we figured out the microphone was on... because I knew just how bad I sounded, and she had no context clues with which to figure out what was going on! LOL

I think your telling this story just might be one of the most embarrassing things that's happened to me in a long time!

lyric · 05-10-2010, 02:38 PM

AND now that work is over and I have more time... I wanted to add... the whole no eye contact thing was freaking me the hell out. I thought I played it off in a teasing way, with the nudges and the whole "why won't you look at me" and "is something wrong" and whatever else I said that probably didn't sound as teasing as I meant it to but probably completely betrayed how much I was freaking out on the inside... LOL
There was a past occasion where I'd met someone from online who actually said to me, "You're not really what I was expecting. I usually don't go for girls who are overweight like you are." so when Toxic continued to stare straight ahead... at her phone... at the sky... at a telephone pole... I was like, WTF?! Is it my ass? LOL When Toxic pointed out that I'd performed this little display in front of a microphone, I gracefully excused myself so that I could go outside and have a heart attack all by my lonesome.

On other occasions, I've mis-sent posts and emails to people, such as the time I emailed a friend about a guy we knew, an email in which I detailed all of the many ways and reasons why this guy was a first class asshole. I was so up in arms that I actually sent it to said guy by mistake, instead of my friend. Another time, I was the emcee for an online graphic design auction for about 80 people. Someone sent me a whisper in the chat that said something like "waving my tinklebug in your face" and I replied in all caps, shouting "YOUR TINKLEBUG!! GET THAT TINKLEBUG OUT OF MY FACE AND PUT IT BACK IN YOUR PANTS WHERE IT BELONGS!"... but I said it to the entire audience at the auction instead of in private to my friend.

Self-degradation comes really easily to me, Medusa, so don't worry. You're not alone!

femmedyke · 05-12-2010, 10:41 AM

On a recent trip to Trader Joe's I encountered this pesky little sales guy who was short like me and around every corner I turned asking if he could help me with something. After the sixth time bumping into him I finally needed some assistance and asked if he could help me find the turkey jerky. We searched together and were unable to find it. At that point he told me I should try the buffalo jerky, because it was "really, really good." I very haughtily said "I don't eat beef" and turned and walked away.

It was really only recounting the story to my lover when I realized (or she realized) that "buffalo isn't beef sweetie." Gah! I am in fact sure it was much worse to be embarrassed in front of my partner, than some creepy sales guy!

**not my biggest embarrassing moment... but I'm working up to it!

05-10-2010, 09:15 AM	#1
StoneFinn Member How Do You Identify?: Transgressive Male Preferred Pronoun?: masculine Relationship Status: hog-tied with love Join Date: Feb 2010 Location: beyond the never-never Posts: 157 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 234 Thanked 312 Times in 91 Posts Rep Power: 1671350	So, I was taking her out for dinner for the first time. I was still young and wearing a wallet chain. Not just a "wallet chain" but the Old School Industrial-Punk Wallet Chain. Nice, solid heavy links... what hung in a nice drape... down to my knee. I held her chair out for her, tucking her in as she sat. I took my seat across from her, and we ordered. I was terribly nervous. I decided that I needed to go wash my hands-- anything to settle my nerves down a bit. I excuse myself, and get up from my chair. The washroom is across the dining room, but I have to go around the table and go by her chair to head toward the door. So, I get up, and with much more "intent" or "focus" than I thought that I was putting in to it, I move to head towards the washroom....... except... my Screw-The-Establishment-Walletchain has hooked on to a rather solid part of her chair unbeknownst to me, and with the speed and finesse of a magician pulling the tablecloth out from underneath the crystal-- I yank her chair right out from underneath her, and take it with me for about 2 to 3 steps before I realise just what has happened. I apparently turned so red that I was purple, and that I believe that so much blood was going into me blushing that I have no memory of what happened next. (apparently, though, she forgave me... and considered me "endearing" as that wasn't our only date! lol ) (oh, and no-- no more walletchains.) __________________ "Iron rusts from disuse, stagnant water loses its purity, and in cold weather becomes frozen; even so does inaction sap the vigors of the mind." ~~ Da Vinci "If I were to think of and dwell on disastrous possibilities, I could do nothing. I throw myself headlong into my work, and come up again with my studies; if the storm within gets too loud, I take a glass too much to stun myself." ~~ Van Gogh

05-12-2010, 10:41 AM	#4
femmedyke Member How Do You Identify?: femme Preferred Pronoun?: she, her Join Date: Jan 2010 Location: mostly in my head Posts: 396 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 638 Thanked 957 Times in 198 Posts Rep Power: 8571021	On a recent trip to Trader Joe's I encountered this pesky little sales guy who was short like me and around every corner I turned asking if he could help me with something. After the sixth time bumping into him I finally needed some assistance and asked if he could help me find the turkey jerky. We searched together and were unable to find it. At that point he told me I should try the buffalo jerky, because it was "really, really good." I very haughtily said "I don't eat beef" and turned and walked away. It was really only recounting the story to my lover when I realized (or she realized) that "buffalo isn't beef sweetie." Gah! I am in fact sure it was much worse to be embarrassed in front of my partner, than some creepy sales guy! **not my biggest embarrassing moment... but I'm working up to it! __________________ “purple does something strange to me” -charles bukowski

05-10-2010, 02:38 PM	#3
lyric Junior Member How Do You Identify?: Queer Femme Preferred Pronoun?: she Relationship Status: quiet and content Join Date: Feb 2010 Location: Springfield, VA Posts: 88 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 161 Thanked 303 Times in 56 Posts Rep Power: 3971634	AND now that work is over and I have more time... I wanted to add... the whole no eye contact thing was freaking me the hell out. I thought I played it off in a teasing way, with the nudges and the whole "why won't you look at me" and "is something wrong" and whatever else I said that probably didn't sound as teasing as I meant it to but probably completely betrayed how much I was freaking out on the inside... LOL There was a past occasion where I'd met someone from online who actually said to me, "You're not really what I was expecting. I usually don't go for girls who are overweight like you are." so when Toxic continued to stare straight ahead... at her phone... at the sky... at a telephone pole... I was like, WTF?! Is it my ass? LOL When Toxic pointed out that I'd performed this little display in front of a microphone, I gracefully excused myself so that I could go outside and have a heart attack all by my lonesome. On other occasions, I've mis-sent posts and emails to people, such as the time I emailed a friend about a guy we knew, an email in which I detailed all of the many ways and reasons why this guy was a first class asshole. I was so up in arms that I actually sent it to said guy by mistake, instead of my friend. Another time, I was the emcee for an online graphic design auction for about 80 people. Someone sent me a whisper in the chat that said something like "waving my tinklebug in your face" and I replied in all caps, shouting "YOUR TINKLEBUG!! GET THAT TINKLEBUG OUT OF MY FACE AND PUT IT BACK IN YOUR PANTS WHERE IT BELONGS!"... but I said it to the entire audience at the auction instead of in private to my friend. Self-degradation comes really easily to me, Medusa, so don't worry. You're not alone!