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Old 06-24-2016, 07:05 PM   #1
DapperButch
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Originally Posted by Soon View Post
Your comment indicated nothing EXPLICIT about whether or not you found it acceptable but, no, I don't think you would find such unprofessional behaviour appropriate.

However, I *did* find your response somewhat surprising and a bit troubling in its implicit connotations, as it focused on proposing a harmless, playful, and even perhaps justified, reason for her intrusive behaviour toward Chad. The "two by four" is a common humorous turn of phrase thrown about due to this perception that butches are clueless when it comes to a woman's attraction toward them. It struck me as minimizing what Chad was feeling and experiencing. I put myself in the same situation (which I have been) and how I'd be frustrated if someone said the same thing to me after me opening up that a guy was bothering me in such a manner at work. It would be somewhat invalidating, as it does take the angle of...well, maybeeeee he just likes you and you're too clueless to realize it!

It's like if someone was bothering a student, and I said, "Well, maybe he LIKES you!" which indicates more of an absolution or justification for such unwanted behaviour. It adds a bit of a rationale to their behaviour on the person who is acting inappropriately and suggests that maybe, if you just realized they liked you, you would feel differently and not be quite as irritated by them.

I hope this explains more of my response. No, I do not think you would find it acceptable behaviour but, yes, I did find your response carried an odd angle which prompted me to respond in turn.

I've been waiting for your response to my post, so I'm glad I was able to elaborate a bit more for you and hope you understand a bit more where I'm coming from.
Ok, I get it. Completely.

What was actually going on in my head was the memory of me teasing Chad in the "crush" thread a couple of months ago. He came in at two different points saying, "nope, I don't see my name here" (something along those lines). I teased him about it at the time saying that I had seen my name in there thousands of times, and I believe there was also that "butch 2x4" talk (which I have always found annoying), in the thread close to our posts (so the 2x4 comment was a flashback to that moment, too). So, that is probably why I had tunnel vision on that post. Plus, I really thought that his question was the point of the post.
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Old 06-24-2016, 07:15 PM   #2
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Originally Posted by DapperButch View Post
Ok, I get it. Completely.

What was actually going on in my head was the memory of me teasing Chad in the "crush" thread a couple of months ago. He came in at two different points saying, "nope, I don't see my name here" (something along those lines). I teased him about it at the time "saying that I had seen my name in there thousands of times, and I believe there was also that "butch 2x4 talk in the thread close to those posts (so the 2x4 comment was a flashback to that moment in the thread, too). So, that is probably why I had tunnel vision on that post. Plus, I really thought that his question was the point of the post.
I don't think that I have ever seen my name in so many posts. Dapper buddy I loved your post to me.

The posts from Soon and Gemme have given me food for thought. I usually just ignore bad behavior but this young lady at work does behave unprofessional and something should be done about it.

I appreciate everyone's feed back and will ponder my next steps. I think for me the first step is to tell my coworker that her behavior offends me. If she continues then I will elevate the conversation.

Thank you to everyone that offered advice.
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Old 11-16-2016, 08:30 PM   #3
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That awkward moment when you go out for dinner with your daughter, an hour away from home, look up after sitting down, and realize you are wearing pretty much an identical outfit. (her red Chucks, me red Docks, both in blue jeans, both the exact same v-neck long sleeve black t-shirt- seriously the same exact shirt. Didn't even know we both owned it. Hair done in similar fashion.
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Old 11-17-2016, 06:17 AM   #4
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That awkward moment when you go out for dinner with your daughter, an hour away from home, look up after sitting down, and realize you are wearing pretty much an identical outfit. (her red Chucks, me red Docks, both in blue jeans, both the exact same v-neck long sleeve black t-shirt- seriously the same exact shirt. Didn't even know we both owned it. Hair done in similar fashion.


As I was reading this the Patty Duke song sprang into my head. They look alike sometimes they even dress alike....what a wild duet!
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Old 09-19-2017, 12:56 AM   #5
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you tell at your girl crush hetero that you have sentiments for her ^^ and she tells you politly that no yeah akward as fuck but thanks it happens only once!
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Old 09-20-2017, 07:57 AM   #6
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The moment you realize that the sword that they are creating on Forged in Fire is basically a giant penis.

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Old 06-24-2016, 07:17 PM   #7
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Originally Posted by DapperButch View Post
Ok, I get it. Completely.

What was actually going on in my head was the memory of me teasing Chad in the "crush" thread a couple of months ago. He came in at two different points saying, "nope, I don't see my name here" (something along those lines). I teased him about it at the time saying that I had seen my name in there thousands of times, and I believe there was also that "butch 2x4" talk (which I have always found annoying), in the thread close to our posts (so the 2x4 comment was a flashback to that moment, too). So, that is probably why I had tunnel vision on that post. Plus, I really thought that his question was the point of the post.
Thanks for engaging with me in a respectful manner and hearing where I was coming from!
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