Lesbian Visibility--Your needs? Your thoughts?

[Virago]

Originally Posted by homoe

Excellent topic!

Being older, I guess I don't really require much from having a sense of gay community at this age but I too wonder how the younger folks find or maybe they don't even require a sense of community??
I'm in my early 60's and I remember having bars, support groups, and a local publication (Gay People's Union) that all lent to a sense of community! The support groups at the Counseling Center in Milwaukee dealt with all ranges and ages. From those questioning their sexuality (My Space) to those who knew their sexuality (Our Space) to older lesbians (Silver Space).
Those programs/groups no longer exist and I wonder sometimes if that's a good or bad thing!

Even at our ages there could become a need for support. Especially when Homophobia rears its ugly voice.

So, in your early 60's, what do you think your area could do to get you involved in helping to start a community?

[Virago]

And don't worry. I by no means want to make anyone feel like they HAVE to get involved in their communities. I know that just isn't feasible for some.

I just need to collect ideas to help me reach out to different groups of people here in my town.

[Vivacious1]

Ok, I may be way off base, but I will just share what I have experienced and what it is like for me here.
I have lived in different places throughout my adult life. When I lived in Philadelphia, there was a large women's population, along with trans, leather etc. What I experienced was a much larger accommodation for gay men than anyone. That aside, there were some lesbian bars, however, they were not very accepting of trans folks... so, that was a huge turn off for me. I personally felt uncomfortable at some of these clubs, because they always seemed to be off in an alley, Not sure why this is, but seemed almost like out of sight out of mind. What I would have loved is more outreach, I would have liked to feel safe.
Then where I live now is quite a small town, compared to Philly, we have to lesbian bars here, very small....they are coincidently off side roads (almost hidden) as well. Now, this experience is quite special. First, we have the Christian Crusaders, holding signs of how we will burn in hell etc... that is a bit unnerving, added to that, in the deep south, it really is just known to keep it quiet... It can be very lonely as a lesbian, from what I have experienced here is the majority of the "seen" lesbians are quite young. There will be an occasional holding of hands in public here, but I literally cringe when I see it, the fear just makes me run cold. I would love to see more support here, I would love to feel more acceptance, I would like to walk into a club and not feel as if my life were not at stake.
I believe I have rambled enough... I hope that I have come close to what u were looking for!

As far as keeping in touch with happenings, I have the bar owner on my facebook page and she post updates

[Bubala]

Ok I had to dig this thread out!

During my recent travels I found out that the last two lesbian bars in Tel Aviv have closed... Gay bars are everywhere...yet similar that's not the same...

Yesterday I happen to come across "Gaycation" a Viceland TV show. I saw the Paris episode and interestingly enough noticed that almost the exact same things have been described to be happening in Paris.

I know that what I'm about to say might inflame some people, however, please do not take this statement as provocation or defamation, my intentions are far from malicious, I'm just throwing this out there as food for thought and healthy discussion...

Ehm, so here it comes- Today everyone wants to be Queer but no one wants to be a Lesbian anymore.

One thing I've noticed among some younger people (worldwide), is that a word "Lesbian" has suddenly absorbed some sort of negativity, it has become a dirty word, along with the word "Butch". "GenderQueer" is the New Millennium acceptable alternative... In my humble personal opinion those two are interchangeable or mutually compatible terms... as they are two quite different buckets of attributes.

Being a Lesbian in 2016 somehow comes with derogatory undertones...

I wonder why?

French Lesbian scene in 2016 appears to be 100% underground society just like pre 1960es. Mostly kinky society.
Israeli Lesbian scene is non-existant, I've heard someone there say "if you aren't "Queer" enough to hang around the gay boys, tough luck bitch!" lolol I am not going to reveal how I wished I could have responded to that lolol

Anyways, it's not about the Gays, it's not about the Queers, it's not about any other pink, purple and polka dotted, sliced and diced micro identity... It's about visibility... diminishing visibility...

Someone said "Being quiet does not mean being invisible" ... but how are you gong to be heard if you're quiet? Are we fine with being invisible? Out of sight out of mind!

Social battle is not over... it is far from over...

Should we be happy to retire to the underground?
In my opinion the "underground exclusive" may ostracize large portion of the community...

Is an occasional public bdsm dungeon all we shall be reduced to? (there's nothing wrong with dungeons don't get me wrong just there's more to a tree then a single leaf !)

I'm the first person not to be hitting up bars, just never felt comfortable in such social surroundings much... what can I say I'm just a nerd who prefers to deal with paperwork, petitions and lobbying for legislative push of all kinds... That said... Once you notice a social trend on national level, it concerns you. Once you notice it on global level, shouldn't it alarm you ever so slightly? Shouldn't we wake up from this deep sleep for just a second?

There you go....Those are my 5 cents....

Now I feel sad, old, Lesbian and oh so unQueer. lol

[cathexis]

There is a big reduction in the amount of lesbian space at least from my vantage point. Yeah, what has happened to womyn's (or dyke) bars of the late 70's, 80's, and even thru to the Millenium. They seem to have closed being replaced by gay bars.
Do enjoy spending time at The Eagle with my leather bros, but lesbian/dyke bars are an integral part of our community that's just plain GONE. Am i just being nostalgic (came out during the late 70's)? Did we not support our sisters who were bar owners OR is it something even more sinister?
Have Lesbian Seps vanished? What has happened to our periodicals like "Lesbian Connections" and "Off Our Backs" (let alone "On Our Backs"...SEG and sigh). Don't even wanna touch the topic of MichFest's demise!
Yes, (Virginia...smile) there are Genderqueer older folks. It's not just a Millenial buzz word for lesbian, but an identifer those of us who fit somewhere else along the contineum! i own that.
<sorry...said submissively...with another smile>

[~ocean]

I noticed Hillary has a cute butch guarding her ~ watch the next time she is lead off a stage . as to this topic ~ great one btw ~V..... living in Massachusetts it's gay land. soo we r not short on visibility. lol

[not2shygrrl]

Well, around here I am the lesbian that is visible!! For many years tho I lived in a city that had visibility. Sometimes it was seen as positive and sometimes it was seen as negative. That was dependent on where you were at the time of holding hands for example, and if not in a social lesbian club or gay safe place there were some additional locations such as parks and known areas. Also for me, being around and with my family with my gf was/is always positive.

I like the term lesbian to identify something about me, I wear that term proudly!! I think as time goes on there are different words used from what I know and knew. Yea, I think id terms were more extreme being one way or the other back then, butch being the most definitive, and yet femme was used generically if you were not butch. That left a lot of room for how people identified about themselves but didn't know how to be even more different with adding more terminology. At some point I grabbed onto the word tweener in the late 90's to describe myself. To describe someones id/look and now with all the variables it can be confusing and feeling lost or not seen happens more frequently. I have to say I remember feeling sometimes from with in and what I saw among my friends and acquaintances was the in-between of that one way or another, hence the tweener word. Where I live is rural and I don't expect to see another lesbian out here .....as much as I hope to.....she is not gonna fall out of the sky and land beside me!

The Lesbian Connection For, By & About Lesbians is alive and well, even has a website!! They do ask for a donation, but it is not necessary as they are " free to lesbians worldwide" . The cover still always promotes women art. They have been around for many years and I am happy they are still thriving!

So maybe the term lesbian is not used as much, maybe outta all the gay possibilities us lesbians are the thinkers and watchers with different variations. It's not to say that we are complacent, but I am OK with no lime light. I know where I came from, and I know where I want to go. I thank the many before me that laid the path I follow, and hopefully I have added some bricks to the path to keep it going for others. Lesbian sisters...I love you !! I see you......I just know we will always exists and are not doomed. Aww hell, hopefully not sounding full of my lesbianism .....even responding here makes me feel a little elitist with that title!