Can a poly/mono work?

JDeere · 04-20-2017, 08:28 PM

I'm single now but talking about experiences is a good thing.

girl_dee · 04-21-2017, 02:15 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by JDeere

I'm single now but talking about experiences is a good thing.

Yes its the only thing we have to go by isn't it?

my life in poly let me know i love it, it also showed me how badly things can turn out if everyone is not on the same page, and if someone is going along with things to avoid causing a breakdown of the unit.

girl_dee · 04-21-2017, 02:35 AM

Some people think having a poly heart is one that never experiences insecurities. That is not true.

People in mono relationships have told me i am cold and i don't care . i guess this is because i don't get all freaked out if i think they are noticing someone. i have an "ohhh yes i could see why you are attracted to her" attitude...or hey "invite her over"..... i usually don't feel threatened unless there is something else going on. If someone is going to leave, being jealous won't make them stay. For me, it will push me out the door. i want my person to be loved up on in every way from whoever they invite in, as long as our relationship is rock SOLID, the communication and connection is there, i know i am good and enjoy knowing they are happy.

Thats what a true poly heart is IMO. Having a rock solid relationship that allows you to feel joy for that person even when they are with someone else. While i can have many lovers, and am a terrible flirt, that one relationship is at the core always. Its where the strength comes from for me.

THEN there are the times where emotions come up and slap you in the face. Emotions you don't recognize or know what to do with. It feels ugly. You feel ashamed. For me when this happens i have to dig deep and find out why. This is the hard stuff that i like to overcome.

This lifestyle is certainly not for everyone, but having a chosen family is the greatest, most greatest gift.

04-21-2017, 02:35 AM	#3
girl_dee Practically Lives Here How Do You Identify?: Femme Preferred Pronoun?: dee Relationship Status: Hitched up Join Date: Nov 2009 Location: Livin’ the Dream Posts: 24,079 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 30,560 Thanked 54,829 Times in 13,908 Posts Rep Power: 21474873	thoughts! Some people think having a poly heart is one that never experiences insecurities. That is not true. People in mono relationships have told me i am cold and i don't care . i guess this is because i don't get all freaked out if i think they are noticing someone. i have an "ohhh yes i could see why you are attracted to her" attitude...or hey "invite her over"..... i usually don't feel threatened unless there is something else going on. If someone is going to leave, being jealous won't make them stay. For me, it will push me out the door. i want my person to be loved up on in every way from whoever they invite in, as long as our relationship is rock SOLID, the communication and connection is there, i know i am good and enjoy knowing they are happy. Thats what a true poly heart is IMO. Having a rock solid relationship that allows you to feel joy for that person even when they are with someone else. While i can have many lovers, and am a terrible flirt, that one relationship is at the core always. Its where the strength comes from for me. THEN there are the times where emotions come up and slap you in the face. Emotions you don't recognize or know what to do with. It feels ugly. You feel ashamed. For me when this happens i have to dig deep and find out why. This is the hard stuff that i like to overcome. This lifestyle is certainly not for everyone, but having a chosen family is the greatest, most greatest gift.

04-20-2017, 08:28 PM	#1
JDeere Practically Lives Here How Do You Identify?: Transgender Preferred Pronoun?: He/him/his Relationship Status: Single Join Date: Jul 2014 Location: Oklahoma Posts: 17,752 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 31,018 Thanked 28,833 Times in 9,708 Posts Rep Power: 21474865	I'm single now but talking about experiences is a good thing.