OFOS Butches & Femmes

kittygrrl · 11-01-2017, 01:25 PM

I don't think I've ever had to figure out who does what for whom (on a date) because by the time we get to the dating phase we know each other well enough to understand what we can expect from each other. It's stressful not have a clear understanding of your date's expectations. I don't imagine most dates go well under ambiguous circumstances.

Femmewench · 11-01-2017, 01:55 PM

The one thing I haven't seen included in the list of OFOS behavior is standing when you're meeting/greeting someone. I have been surprised at how infrequently I've been the recipient of that courtesy even from self identified OFOS butches. The exception is work related. Both men and women I've been meeting/greeting usually do stand to shake my hand.

I don't expect a date to stand each time I leave a table in a restaurant, but I would be impressed. That seems to have fallen out of favor.

And when did helping a woman with her chair stop being a thing? I can remember my dad helping my grandmother (a widow) and then my mom when we ate out. It's the most helpful thing you can do if we're in a skirt or dress.

11-01-2017, 01:25 PM	#1
kittygrrl Infamous Member How Do You Identify?: witchy Preferred Pronoun?: gf Relationship Status: Til you believe Join Date: Nov 2009 Location: wrapped in a shawl Posts: 9,760 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 21,730 Thanked 22,161 Times in 7,228 Posts Rep Power: 21474862	I don't think I've ever had to figure out who does what for whom (on a date) because by the time we get to the dating phase we know each other well enough to understand what we can expect from each other. It's stressful not have a clear understanding of your date's expectations. I don't imagine most dates go well under ambiguous circumstances. __________________ "We're nine meals from anarchy"" Lewis

11-01-2017, 01:55 PM	#2
Femmewench Member How Do You Identify?: Casual Femme Saphiosexual Preferred Pronoun?: she, her Relationship Status: Divorced Join Date: Aug 2017 Location: Albuquerque, NM Posts: 376 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 1,676 Thanked 1,269 Times in 330 Posts Rep Power: 10346603	The one thing I haven't seen included in the list of OFOS behavior is standing when you're meeting/greeting someone. I have been surprised at how infrequently I've been the recipient of that courtesy even from self identified OFOS butches. The exception is work related. Both men and women I've been meeting/greeting usually do stand to shake my hand. I don't expect a date to stand each time I leave a table in a restaurant, but I would be impressed. That seems to have fallen out of favor. And when did helping a woman with her chair stop being a thing? I can remember my dad helping my grandmother (a widow) and then my mom when we ate out. It's the most helpful thing you can do if we're in a skirt or dress. __________________ "And the day came when the risk to remain tight in a bud was more painful than the risk it took to blossom" Anais Nin