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#1 |
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I don't know. Really don't at this point. Kind and funny. Reasonable. If people aren't smart, they tend not to be attracted to me. So that is usually there.
An observer of boundaries. Playful but not immature. Not walking around oblivious to others. Basically kind and fun. What's the point otherwise? If you still have extraordinary ego needs at our age, OMFG no. Be relatively secure and enjoy time alone with yourself. Don't be constantly shopping for validation. Like pets. Be on the left politically. Do not be controlling or opinionated about little things I do. Couples like that live a nightmare existence IMO. Have a fucking life of your own. Don't be boring. Quiet is fine. Even random riffs on stupid stuff. But have some interesting reactions to life. Read books. Care about people and the planet. In your job or somewhere in your life, show that you are doing something about it. Respect my time. I am not going to run your errands or do your paperwork. I mean, shit. Be considerate with decent manners. Not bone selfish. Be able to support yourself including provisions for care when you age or become disabled. Basically BE a grown up who has the playfulness and wonder of a child somewhere inside.
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"No matter how cynical I get, I just can't keep up" - Lily Tomlin |
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#2 |
Infamous Member
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Be kind, honest, intelligent, good sense of humor, have a positive outlook on life, be a complement to my gender/sexual identity (e.g. femme, submissive, etc). Beyond that we just have to see how well we get along. I don't like having a long list of requirements. I would rather be pleasantly surprised.
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Love consists in this, that two solitudes protect and touch and greet each other. - Rainer Maria Rilke |
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#3 |
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Tomboyish eccentric antique femme Preferred Pronoun?:
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My Ms Wonderful is honest, kind, intelligent, good manners, left-leaning politically. Preferably is OK with cats. Preferably doesn't smoke. Must not be a drug user or alcoholic, other factors may apply if have previously been an addict/drunk.
Nice sense of humour. Very much their own person, but happy to let me help/support them in their life and will help/support me in mine. Wants to spend time with me, but doesn't go nuts if we're apart for a few days. Able to cope with a certain amount of eccentricity. Able to hold a decent conversation. Beyond that, well... it's hard to say. There are many types of look that float my boat. It really is the personality that is most important with me. That said, my libido errs toward lusting after femmes, but some butches have made it sit up and take attention too. If butch, must identify as female, though. |
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#4 |
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She, please. Relationship Status:
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I really don't know if it's possible, but I am always hopeful!
The wonderful special someone in my life will, I'd like to think, like my klutzy-angel side. That if I give them an notebook, they will journal about all the things that they like about me, things that spur their imagination, that causes them to wonder in delight about me (things brought up.in an recent HONY video I saw just today). I just watched a video on f.b., which is an ongoing series about human relationships of the romantic kind. It touched my heart. Romantic relationship ideas from people of all ages! I've talked at length on the forum boards here about all types of things I'm looking for in an romantic relationship, but I think most important to me is that I'd hope the person I become involved with will truly accept me for who I am. That they'll see that my whole life up to now is more than just about all the things that have shaped me into who I am, with regard to any factor in that process, whether it was good, bad or ugly. I think, still, that there's someone out there who truly gets me. Who adores me and is not abashed by views I hold which might not align significantly with their own. I'm an independent thinker, I am independent in my political philosophy, as well. I am okay with my single status, but I won't want an romantic relationship where equity between the two of us is compromised in ways that leaves either person feeling like they have to watch what they say or can't be open or honest about their feelings either. In my mind, the person who is "Wonderful" will embrace me for who I am and be not only enthralled with me, but be real in their relationship expectations and be willing to be delightfully surprised by my entire personality. To me, as I age, it seems impractical to become involved romantically if mutual attraction and an reasonable set of like-mindedness is not present from the get go. Anyway....if you get a chance to view the latest video by Humans of New York (HONY), S1: E4 -- Relationships, then check it out. I enjoyed watching it and could identify with those who participated in the latest subject for people who are either in a relationship and happy or just barely age 7 and trying to have an intelligent conversation about these types of things. ![]()
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#5 |
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Has to be stronger than me... No easy feat
The rest makes me sound selfish so I won't go there. Lol
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Life is a series of natural and spontaneous changes. Don't resist them - that only creates sorrow. Let reality be reality. Let things flow naturally forward in whatever way they like. ~Lao Tzu |
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#6 | |
Practically Lives Here
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I do not have Facebook, is it available somewhere else do you or anyone else know? |
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#7 | |
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She, please. Relationship Status:
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https://m.youtube.com/channel/UCJ8CZrZO_2dwYXR1uzUScOg P. S. Most of the videos they film are live streamed on Facebook, though. I tried finding the S1:E4 video earlier on YouTube but couldn't find it there. So sorry homoe!
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“Leadership is not a title or a position.
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#8 | |
Member
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http://www.humansofnewyork.com/ Very interesting film narratives on an variety of human conditions. HONY just finished their film series with an heart wrenching episode titled: Comnections. I highly recommend the entire film series. ![]()
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“Leadership is not a title or a position.
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#9 | |
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I don't either, but the game for singles is "if you had your *ideal,* what would it be?" I know my ideal career is far more than the career that I love to bits. My ideal cat is different than the one I have and love to bits and would never give up. My ideal apartment is different than the one I'm in or willing to take. So Ideal and what you'd be willing and happy to work with is different, no? |
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#10 | |
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I couldn't have imagined ahead of time any of my past partners or their combination of qualities other than obvious ones like femme, compatible with stone butch, etc. Of course given that I am a Dominant Stone Butch Daddy there is a lot to be compatible with, so I guess mine is complicated from the get go. But I have been very pleasantly surprised every time in the past. So I prefer it that way. And I would hate to be measured against a long list of qualifications - unless of course I miraculously passed most of them, lol. I think real live people are better than any list we can dream up (well they can be a lot worse too, so there is that), but yeah we all think about it differently. After reading Esme's post though I do need to add left-leaning politics as a must!
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#11 |
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hmn. I think I saw this as a game
if you ask me what I'd like in a *real* date I would list something very different and leave most things up to chance. I only have about 5 or 6 absolutes I require in dating folks. That's *much* different than a game of an ideal. I would HATE to think that me talking about an ideal/perfect/dream is *ANYTHING* I would *EVER* expect *ANYONE* to *EVER* live up to. Because it doesn't exist. Ideals don't exist. so, this isn't measuring against a long list of qualifications. Even remotely. To me, this is a parlour game of "doesn't exist" ETA I think if the question had been worded "what do you require in a partner" rather than "singles, describe your perfect partner to while away the hours on a monday night" I would have answered very differently. One sounds like a based in reality list, the other sounds ( to me and my brain) sounds like a game in front of the fire place like "if you could go anywhere in time, where would you go." and "If you could be any person in history, who would you be" kind of thing. Pure fantasy. |
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#12 |
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Yeah I probably misread the intent of thread. Either way I don’t have an ideal in mind. I do write fiction so I make up characters quite often, but in this case for me I would just rather see what the real women are like.
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#13 |
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So, no fantasy date ladies for you! ok
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#14 |
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Agreed. Rather see what real women are like.
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