PTSD and Trauma recovery

candy_coated_bitch · 09-20-2019, 05:24 PM

Yeah, it's whatever works for you personally. If you're having problems with your therapist please don't hesitate to either bring it up with them or shop around. I've fired a number of therapists in my past. I now have one I love.

EMDR also works really well for me. It brings certain memories from being super intrusive and distressing to kind of digestable.

I had a very distressing week with my cPTSD. I woke up to hearing something at the front door. I immediately jumped out of bed in a panic. One of the running tapes in my mind is someone breaking into my apartment and assaulting me and/or killing me. I think about it almost every night. It's crazy. Anyway, in that moment my worst fears felt like they were coming true. I have no idea what I heard, but it doesn't matter it totally set me off. I've been barely sleeping, having to take extra Valium due to uncontrollable anxiety, and having nightmares and flashbacks. I hate how something like a sound at the front door can set me back so far.

I had therapy yesterday, which did help. I wasn't prepared to do EMDR around the traumas that brought me to that reaction, but I will get there. It was a supportive and constructive conversation though. I'm so glad I have a great therapist.

Anyway, I feel like I'm rambling. I appreciate the support of this thread so much. And I offer everyone my love and support and hope for better times.

dark_crystal · 09-21-2019, 06:22 AM

Family reunion today. I'm already triggered and on half a Xanax. Even if nobody gets around to hate speech or microaggression today, it's just excruciating being in a room containing the entire leadership of the Montgomery county Tea Party and a bunch of people who refused to attend my wedding.

One cousin, the youngest, represented my mom's family at my wedding (aside from my mom). Way back in 1997 he asked to do something inappropriate to me, though, so i am not exactly hoping he'll be there.

My therapist would say i should not go. But my mom is kind of trapped in her house unless me or my sister can help her with dad.

Dad is probably winding up a microaggression for the car ride, though, as he is unhappy about me taking Mr. Jenny's name recently. He found out about it last week and i know he has been stewing, unless his dementia ate the information, which is not something to hope for, but still.

Mr. Jenny is out of town, so i will have to drive with my dad riding shotgun. Hopefully he will nap and not talk.

09-20-2019, 05:24 PM	#1
candy_coated_bitch Pixie Stick How Do You Identify?: The arteest formerly known as musicfemme. Preferred Pronoun?: She. Relationship Status: Happily taken. Join Date: Aug 2012 Location: Northampton, MA Posts: 11,293 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 31,723 Thanked 31,841 Times in 6,111 Posts Rep Power: 21474857	Yeah, it's whatever works for you personally. If you're having problems with your therapist please don't hesitate to either bring it up with them or shop around. I've fired a number of therapists in my past. I now have one I love. EMDR also works really well for me. It brings certain memories from being super intrusive and distressing to kind of digestable. I had a very distressing week with my cPTSD. I woke up to hearing something at the front door. I immediately jumped out of bed in a panic. One of the running tapes in my mind is someone breaking into my apartment and assaulting me and/or killing me. I think about it almost every night. It's crazy. Anyway, in that moment my worst fears felt like they were coming true. I have no idea what I heard, but it doesn't matter it totally set me off. I've been barely sleeping, having to take extra Valium due to uncontrollable anxiety, and having nightmares and flashbacks. I hate how something like a sound at the front door can set me back so far. I had therapy yesterday, which did help. I wasn't prepared to do EMDR around the traumas that brought me to that reaction, but I will get there. It was a supportive and constructive conversation though. I'm so glad I have a great therapist. Anyway, I feel like I'm rambling. I appreciate the support of this thread so much. And I offer everyone my love and support and hope for better times. __________________ My Etsy Shop My Patreon My Website

09-21-2019, 06:22 AM	#2
dark_crystal Infamous Member How Do You Identify?: jenny Preferred Pronoun?: babygirl Relationship Status: First Lady of the United SMH Join Date: Jan 2010 Location: Houston, Texas Posts: 5,445 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 1,532 Thanked 26,550 Times in 4,688 Posts Rep Power: 21474856	Family reunion today. I'm already triggered and on half a Xanax. Even if nobody gets around to hate speech or microaggression today, it's just excruciating being in a room containing the entire leadership of the Montgomery county Tea Party and a bunch of people who refused to attend my wedding. One cousin, the youngest, represented my mom's family at my wedding (aside from my mom). Way back in 1997 he asked to do something inappropriate to me, though, so i am not exactly hoping he'll be there. My therapist would say i should not go. But my mom is kind of trapped in her house unless me or my sister can help her with dad. Dad is probably winding up a microaggression for the car ride, though, as he is unhappy about me taking Mr. Jenny's name recently. He found out about it last week and i know he has been stewing, unless his dementia ate the information, which is not something to hope for, but still. Mr. Jenny is out of town, so i will have to drive with my dad riding shotgun. Hopefully he will nap and not talk. __________________