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Finding Your People - Special Groups Are you a member of AA? Neurodiverse? a Vegan? Find your people here! |
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#1 |
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I don't identify with being 'old fashioned' at all.
I am old school. Integrity, manners, charm, do the right thing, protect only when asked, loyalty, compassion, etc. I love it when a femme comes to me and asks for a dance. Femmes should be strong, powerful, in control, knows what she wants and will work/ask for it. I love getting flowers. I love giving flowers. I want to see her out in her glory.....tits showing, slit up the side of her leg skirt, shoes that make me wet (I'm a shoe whore, what can I say), looking/acting like sex walking....ok.....mmmm.......I lost my train of thought....oh yeah.....that is an OS femme in my book...one who owns her body and her sexuality and is not afraid to show the world....and fuck em if they don't like it. I am always puzzled by the linking of 'old fashioned' with 'old school'. They are two different things in my mind. They are not linked together for me. IF they were, then I would be kicking a butch's ass who looked at my date, making butches ask me (not her) if they can dance with her...and a whole lot of other old fashioned ways of treating women. I came out in what most folks think of as OFOS times...early 70's.....there is a whole bunch of that old school stuff that I hate and most of it is centered in the old fashioned way in which women were treated. So for me........I am truly old school. But I truly dislike and am not old fashioned.
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#2 |
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With my souls eyes. Preferred Pronoun?:
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I respect my elders
I prefer a woman's soul over looks I like to be a gentleman to a lady that allows me to I love old school music 50's 60's 70's I have to connect with someone on a deep level before I make love to them I got my ass whipped as a kid. lol I try to be considerate, if I'm not I don't realize it I prefer women with old souls I don't like BS from anyone I try to learn my lessons from the Universe so I don't have to keep going through the same shit I see life as life, some things can be changed some cannot either way it goes I enjoy myself and try not to wallow too long I don't let silly shit affect me I get over things pretty quickly I'm sure there is a more but this is a start OB |
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#3 |
Timed Out - TOS Drama
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Resurrecting this thread.
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#4 |
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hello OS'ers! ♥
i love reading through this thread .. i'm most definitely an old soul - i have many old school values.. i love to be treated like a lady, having the door opened for me , chair pulled out for me, etc... it helps make me feel so cared for, adored.. safe, taken care of.. someone who will hold my hand to keep me close, and i am very traditional in ways of dating/romance.. glad to see this thread resurrected.. ♥ have a wonderful day all!
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my Mantra: i am letting go of angers, continuing to find forgiveness, welcoming inner peace & deserving of it all. my facebook weight loss page:
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#5 |
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Bringing back this thread!
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#6 |
Timed Out - TOS Drama
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![]() This is where it rings....fuck everything else
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#7 |
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Its good to see this thread again
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"When you fall off the wagon ... clutch the sides of it until you get a better grip!" ![]() |
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#8 |
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I don't know how I missed this thread before! In fact, is there another one like it with zero responses? I thought I saw that.
Regardless, I wish I weren't reading this on my phone while at work! I want to go through and savor the entire thread! Sigh. I hope it stays active, and I'll try to do my part. Nightshade |
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#9 |
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wish there was more activity in here..i don't care much for labels but some definitely fit ..people who understand (who i am) are smart and it's just hot when i find someone who gets me
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#10 |
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So there's LBGirl who mentions disingenuous punks who need spankings and OS Butch who mentions Old High Maintenance femmes... I've dealt with the former and I am certainly not the latter, but I still can't exactly describe what makes me OF/OS in a B-F context.
I also remember that just because it's never popularly discussed, there have been troubles, discords and abuses along the B-F continuum which people conveniently forget. Just like some of my fellow neo-traditionals*, I hope we don't forget that nothing is ever perfect because individual things and people are not perfect, either. But if we strive for an ideal because it gives us peace and comfort, we should continue to do it and welcome! I am old-fashioned. I like my computer but I prefer my gramophone to a stereo. I prefer skirts to trousers. I'll take The Andrews Sisters over The Pussycat Dolls. I prefer cooking at home to doing takeout... but most of all I prefer mutual respect, honesty and loyalty to any sort of action or label. These things seem to be lacking. I recently chased off one of those aforementioned punks (without a spanking... mustn't dirty my gloves) after a month or so of dating simply because hy was old enough to know better but too selfish to care. Hy claimed to be OS, and perhaps I didn't know hym well enough to understand how hy reckoned so, but perhaps hys definition of OS and my definition of OF are simply not compatible. *Neo-traditional: A way of life which takes forgotten lessons of the past (modest dress, make-do-and-mend, stiff upper lip, courtesy and community, etc.) and employs them with lessons from the present (anti-homophobia, anti-racism, anti-sexism, etc.) |
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#11 | |
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Not having lived through it though, it's complete speculation on my part. I can only imagine though that that embodiment of OF as 'prudishness' had to have been more prevalent in heterosexual lives than in the Butch/femme community where waiting for marriage and having sex to procreate simply wasn't a part of the equation. And while us femmes have always gotten positive (if unwanted) feedback about our desirability, I cling strongly to the ideal that my foremothers carried within their very core the knowledge that it was up to them to show the butches of the world that they too were sexual forces to be reckoned with. That they were wanted. Needed. Craved. Utterly desired beyond all reason. It was in intricate part of the dance. I refuse to believe that respect and/or sexual hunger was lacking for either party 'back in the day.' |
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#12 |
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Many relate OFOS as being about the 1950’s B-F communities, who were faced with hostility from a very conservative mainstream society, lending itself to a time of much violence – while others draw on the periods prior to that when Butch identity concerned itself with courtesy, chivalry and strength without violence. One context is about oppression, while the other is about codes of behaviour.
We can take almost anything out of context, assigning a meaning that helps to legitimise our argument, but what I think matters is intent. Do I stay cold so that she doesn’t when I offer her my coat, open and hold the door for her, stand when she does, light her cigarette, curtail my language and expect others to do the same when they are around her, compliment, carry what’s heavy… because I think she isn’t capable, believe that she is so fragile that her sensibilities would never recover from a personal affront, because I believe I am superior? Or do I do it to acknowledge her importance, to place myself second in her presence- Is my intention to try to make her way a little more comfortable in the world or is it to oppress? For good or for bad, in mainstream society a Butch is rarely inconspicuous, and a Femme is noticed but rarely seen. As a Butch I will honour her, and do what I can to remove the cloak of invisibility, to allow her to be seen as the woman who is deserving of respect and admiration, to be seen as a Femme. My observations of the world are that the B-F community is becoming one of the last bastions where chivalry still remains. For me, I am happy to be considered old fashioned if the alternative is, as I see around me, a solo dance with everyone on the floor vying for the spotlight.
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I don't act this way to change the world. I act this way so that the goddamn world won't change me!
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#13 |
Junior Member
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she's a femme, dawg! Relationship Status:
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Old school femme here, dropping in to say hello. It's late - I'll be back soon to chat with you fabulous OS folks.
Sweet Thoughts, Ana |
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#14 | |
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As with all of your posts, Converse, your point of view is refreshing and spot on. I believe you articulate what many others wish they could. Well written. sj-fsu
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#15 |
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i was at my Dominants' house recently, and They were getting read to go out. It was a dress up occasion. When it was time to leave, Sir held the door for Ma'am. As She stepped through, She said, "How do i look?" Sir replied, "Lovely." It was just a moment, one like a dozen others that week, i am sure, but it caught my eye. It was beautiful.
i like our dynamic best when it is unstudied, when it is less performative, though that can be fun. But that moment when we recognize and appreciate one another -- it's so good. |
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#16 |
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Wonderful post Converse. Thank you.
Being treated like a lady really brings out the woman in me. His gentleman draws her out and she’s very sensitive to him, unconsciously/automatically responding…things just flow naturally. This is a little hard to verbalize – but it also makes me feel different. Very feminine and not in a fru fru sense; I can feel just as feminine in jeans or sweats as in the frilliest of dresses. It’s a yin/yang thing and very beautiful. |
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#17 |
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Good evening. Thought I'd stop by and see what is going on.
OSB |
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#18 |
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Hello everyone....stopping in to listen and learn
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#19 |
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Evening MadiT.
I have been thinking about Old school and how it seems out of style for some. I wonder why. What is so Old Fashion / Old School about chivalry, honor and commitment? Isn't that the way people should treat people? |
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