Cancer Support and Caregivers Who Are Trail Blazers!

[Kätzchen]

Well... I just want to express my heart felt thanks to members here who have supported me all these years with friendship online and liking my posts.

You all have a very special place in my heart of hearts.

I see my physician tomorrow. She referring me out to an oncologist.

My cancer is both affecting my female organs and my bones in female organ areas. I won't know the extent of damage my cancer is causing until I get a bona fide result on another particular test... but up until a phone call reminder today, I have been taking a naturopath type medication which is produced locally at a certain pharmacy. It is a CBD/THC product which is mixed at a 1:1 ratio. I also take a strict CBD medication for the way my body hurts, constantly.

I am also cutting all my hair off, soon. I promise to look as sexy as I can during this extreme struggle for survival.

Yours truly,

~D.

PS/ lightning struck outside right now. It is rather odd to have a thunderstorm with lightning in October.


PS (again): Thanks for all the love and support. I heart you all. XOXO

[GeorgiaMa'am]

As I recently posted in another thread, the boi has lung cancer. We went to the first appointment with his pulmonologist today. The doctor showed us the x-ray; the mass is 10-15 cm in diameter, in hys right lung.

I went for moral support and also to take notes. My sister took notes for me at all my appointments when I went through cancer, and I found it extremely helpful.

We're just getting started with all the rounds of appointments and tests. They don't yet know the type of cancer or the stage. They will determine these after some more tests and then will develop a care plan. The boi is impatient; hy wants answers now, and has no idea how long and complicated a process this is going to be. I tried to give hym an idea, but I don't want to overwhelm hym.

This is all so familiar, and not in a good way. I want to be there to support hym, but it sure is bringing back some bad memories.

[clay]

Originally Posted by GeorgiaMa'am

As I recently posted in another thread, the boi has lung cancer. We went to the first appointment with his pulmonologist today. The doctor showed us the x-ray; the mass is 10-15 cm in diameter, in hys right lung.



This is all so familiar, and not in a good way. I want to be there to support hym, but it sure is bringing back some bad memories.

((((((((((((((((((((((((Georgia))))))))))))))))))

This IS a hard thing to see happening to a loved one, and yes, it DOES evoke one's own memories/experiences/diagnosis.

Just try to take it one step/day at a time. The visits initially are fast & furious, as it tantamount they get the stage then put a plan together. While we want them to "hurry up"...there are so many variables to consider for each person, as their "cancer" is unique to them. So, "specifics" are very important to create that plan. Patience is key, as you & I know. BUT I also know how scared one can be, with a whole spectrum of other emotions, going on. Hearing the C word scares the crap out of folks. I withdrew to myself for a week when I was diagnosed 12/2009 and told NO ONE.I had to ride that rollercoaster of emotions, thoughts, feelings....acceptance/denial/projection/etc etc and over again. IN NO ORDER!

I will stand with you from afar & offer gentle hugs, encouragement, support, a shoulder/ear.....just know you are NOT technically alone in this. We here will be with you. I know I will.

Allow yourself the time to absorb, digest, and come to terms with this as well. IT won't be easy, but you are NOT alone. Gentle hugs for you & the boi!!

[clay]

UPDATE:

Saw my oncologist today...my labs are screwed up. SO, I am getting a battery of imaging/scope tests just to make sure the elevated CEA (tumor marker levels) aren't "high" for any reason.

I have faith all will come back clean.

I am a survivor & I GOT THIS!

[GeorgiaMa'am]

Originally Posted by clay

I withdrew to myself for a week when I was diagnosed 12/2009 and told NO ONE.I had to ride that rollercoaster of emotions, thoughts, feelings....acceptance/denial/projection/etc etc and over again.

Now that you mention it, I did the same thing. I didn't tell anyone for awhile; I couldn't decide at first if I was even going to do anything about it. Then I couldn't decide who needed to know and who didn't. And I couldn't decide what order to tell them in. I had all kinds of thoughts at first, some crazy and some not so crazy.

Thanks so much for your support and sharing your introspection.

[GeorgiaMa'am]

The boi is starting to realize hy is going to need some help to get through this. Hy's on oxygen, and can barely make it to the bathroom or the kitchen without passing out from not being on the oxygen. The oxygen people are supposed to come tomorrow, and I told hym to ask for a longer line so hy can at least get to those two places in the house.

When I called the boi today, I asked hym how hy felt today. Hy said, "Unwanted." It made me so sad.

Hys son, who lives with hym, is not stepping up to the plate to help out. The son has health problems of his own, but he can't even be bothered to make an extra sandwich for his mom when he goes to the kitchen to make himself one. He can't get himself out of the bed at 6 a.m. to let the boi's dog out - he will just lie in bed for hours and listen to the dog bark and bark. (The last time the boi tried to do it, hy got dizzy and hit hys head on the door jamb.)

The boi's son is a known bum, but the boi won't kick him out. This is just how it is, and how it has been since the kid was born. (He's in his 40s now.) He plays video games all day. I would love to kick his a**, but it wouldn't do any good. But it would make me feel better.

Anyway, we're going to have to line up some help for the boi. I can't do everything - I can't even do all this stuff for myself. I might be able to take the dog. Or we might be able to get a dog walker. I told the boi hy's just getting started on this stuff, and it's going to get harder from here on for a while. Hy said we'll just have to take care of stuff as it comes to us, and hy's right.

[GeorgiaMa'am]

Thank you so much everyone for your kind words and for keeping us in your thoughts. It helps me so much and means a lot.

* * *

The boi is back in the hospital. Hys lung function is at 50%; hys right lung is completely blocked now by the tumor and hys left lung is doing all the work of keeping hym oxygenated. We finally got a hospital patient advocate to run interference; the billing people keep wanting to put off procedures until the boi has Medicare, and the doctors are saying they can't wait any longer. They are conducting the second biopsy today, and they are starting radiation. Apparently, the type of cancer that will be determined by the biopsy has no effect on the radiation treatment; it's the same for all types. We will have to wait for the biopsy results to start chemo, though.

All I can do to help hym at this time is to tell hym what radiation is like in detail. The son is taking care of the dog for now (probably). I'm going to file an extension on hys taxes; they are done, except hy needs to get some information that I can't get from the IRS. Hy doesn't owe anything, so there won't be any penalty. I feel pretty useless though. Thank the Goddess hy has the patient advocate on hys side now; she seems like a real tough lady.

[GeorgiaMa'am]

The boi has been through two rounds of radiation now, and they're doing a third biopsy tomorrow.

Most distressing to hym and me, right now, is that they're calling in the palliative care doctor tomorrow. He wants to meet with the whole family so that everybody is on the same page about what the boi's "options" are, and what the boi wants to do.

The boi doesn't see it as a conversation about "options", hy believes that they're going to tell hym hy has no options and hy is going to die. We have no way of finding out until the appointment tomorrow.

Hy still hasn't eaten in over a week. I made hym a squash casserole and I'm taking it tomorrow. I won't get my feelings hurt if hy can't eat it, but it's hys favorite thing that I cook. I figured it was worth a try. And besides, I needed something to take my mind off this palliative care conversation.