The Never-Ending Bathroom Debate

[Thinker]

Originally Posted by Linus

Most recently I had contacted a 24-hour gym to see which facilities I'd be asked to use. They said it would be whatever is on my official ID (which is still F). I somehow doubt that me -- full beard and all -- would be really welcomed in the women's change room.

I was at least pleased that they were honestly enough to reply to my email about this upfront but seriously, it's annoying to wonder at times. I like working out at gyms sometimes (especially spinning classes) but don't want to wait until I have surgery (part of the need to lose weight is in prep for surgery and general health).

Hey Linus...

Is there a reason you needed to ask the gym about this? Do they require you to show your ID?

Curious...

[AtLast]

Bathrooms and changing rooms.... ARGH!! Make me nuts! LOL... love having a small RV van with my own damn head!

Linus- If you have a gym photo ID, I just can't see why they can't use it and you be able to go into the mens.

Do you have to show a driver's license? It has been so long since I have been a member in a gym, I can't remember what the ID is. Probably all different, anyway.

Good Luck!

[Linus]

Originally Posted by AtLastHome

Bathrooms and changing rooms.... ARGH!! Make me nuts! LOL... love having a small RV van with my own damn head!

Linus- If you have a gym photo ID, I just can't see why they can't use it and you be able to go into the mens.

Do you have to show a driver's license? It has been so long since I have been a member in a gym, I can't remember what the ID is. Probably all different, anyway.

Good Luck!

It's the ID to register with the gym that they use. Since I only have passport and it has my original gender on it.

[Logicaly]

I avoid public restrooms if at all possible unless I know its a place where I wont have any issues. Its very akward for me, because there has been times where I have been stopped by other men from going into the womens restroom, or where women second guess themselves, or stare at me, for using the womens room.

I don't like akward. I just want to get in, do my business and get out. And at work, its even more akward, because I have to use the womens room, cause the owner would probably freak if I used the mens room. The women go in there and chit chat and stuff, and I just want to go in there and take care of business, not talk about my day....

So I always try to wait until I get home if at all possible. In public, I make my girlfriend go in with me, I have found that if I do it that way, for the womens room, that I get a lot less uncomfortable looks that way.

[Nat]

I ran across this interview today. I remember when Khadijah Farmer hit the news because she got kicked out of a women's room by a bouncer during pride in 2007 in the middle of Greenwich Village. She did win a settlement in 2008. AND she was asked to pay the bill even though she'd never been given the food she'd ordered.







She won $35k plus

Among the workplace practices that Caliente Cab agreed to adopt in the settlement was to add gender identity and expression to its corporate nondiscrimination policy; to adopt a gender-neutral dress code for its employees; and to amend its employee handbook to state “persons patronizing or employed at Caliente have the right to use the bathroom facilities consistent with their gender identity and expression.”

[Linus]

Originally Posted by Nat

Among the workplace practices that Caliente Cab agreed to adopt in the settlement was to add gender identity and expression to its corporate nondiscrimination policy; to adopt a gender-neutral dress code for its employees; and to amend its employee handbook to state “persons patronizing or employed at Caliente have the right to use the bathroom facilities consistent with their gender identity and expression.”

That's actually a law in NYC, I believe. I actually have a card from the Gender Identity Project meetings which I carry around (not as much an issue today but when I was first transitioning I held on to it for dear life). The Caliente case was particularly annoying since they get their business from the LGBTQ community (as in, it was one of our own). I think that's what caused the biggest ruckus about all this.

[Nat]

Originally Posted by Linus

That's actually a law in NYC, I believe. I actually have a card from the Gender Identity Project meetings which I carry around (not as much an issue today but when I was first transitioning I held on to it for dear life). The Caliente case was particularly annoying since they get their business from the LGBTQ community (as in, it was one of our own). I think that's what caused the biggest ruckus about all this.

It sucks that a card would have been necessary, but that doesn't sound like a bad way to carry around at least a little back-up if things really escalated in that sort of situation.

I remember a few years back, Rainbow Cattle Company (gay bar) in Austin put these signs on the doors of their bathrooms insisting that only men use the men's room and only women use the women's room, and it did seem especially awful that it was "family" who decided to implement this policy and that they seemed to have no understanding of gender variance. That bar is closed now, and I don't know if others in Austin have similar policies.