Random's Ramblings...

Random · 06-19-2010, 11:50 PM

I tried to replace you, don't cha know?

She was a poet...
she looked like you,
she sounded like you,
Her arms almost felt like you..
she even almost smelled like you..

But she wasn't you..
a kinder, paler version of you..
She had no belives
She had no wild dreams
She didn't have a drop of your passion..

So, I walked away and didn't look back..
I hurt that gentle soul
Because she wasn't you..

I tried to be you, don't cha know..

I found someone
who wanted hard hands and teeth at her neck..
who wanted someone to keep her safe...
to tell her right from wrong...

But I wasn't you...

I didn't have your control,
I didn't have your strenght
I didn't have your convictions...

So, I told her no more..
and I left her shut down and closed off..
Just like me..

I'm done trying to replace you,
because it can't be done

I'm done trying to be you..
because that's not who I am..

I'm done crying because I lost you...
Because it does no good..

Instead

I will simply smile and remember
and know you own my heart..

Until you don't...

Random · 06-20-2010, 12:06 AM

Just about every night
I lay down at a time when my mind is throwing a temper tantrum..
*NO NO NO NO* it says..
I don't wanna go to bed..
Full blown 3 yr old rage..
Arching back, kicking heels..

I tell it to behave,
That we are going to be 40 this year and we must be responsible, do the right thing..

My mind says "NO"
loud and beligerent..
It wants to go dancing..
It wants to get into the car and go driving..
It wants to stay up and read..
It wants to talk on the phone..
It wants..
It wants..

It wants to have a later bed time that a 3 yr old..

Just about every night I have to coax my mind to sleep..

Reminding it that we are to old be to telling lies to ourself..
That we will NOT get up if we stay up just a lil longer..
That just a few more mins WILL hurt..

That having something you want comes with a price..

Wanting always has a price...

06-19-2010, 11:50 PM	#1
Random Senior Member How Do You Identify?: femme Relationship Status: Married Join Date: Nov 2009 Location: back in the land of trees and snow Posts: 2,072 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 8,017 Thanked 5,327 Times in 1,378 Posts Rep Power: 21474854	I tried to replace you, don't cha know? She was a poet... she looked like you, she sounded like you, Her arms almost felt like you.. she even almost smelled like you.. But she wasn't you.. a kinder, paler version of you.. She had no belives She had no wild dreams She didn't have a drop of your passion.. So, I walked away and didn't look back.. I hurt that gentle soul Because she wasn't you.. I tried to be you, don't cha know.. I found someone who wanted hard hands and teeth at her neck.. who wanted someone to keep her safe... to tell her right from wrong... But I wasn't you... I didn't have your control, I didn't have your strenght I didn't have your convictions... So, I told her no more.. and I left her shut down and closed off.. Just like me.. I'm done trying to replace you, because it can't be done I'm done trying to be you.. because that's not who I am.. I'm done crying because I lost you... Because it does no good.. Instead I will simply smile and remember and know you own my heart.. Until you don't... __________________ ~Volunteer~ "It gets in your blood"

06-20-2010, 12:06 AM	#2
Random Senior Member How Do You Identify?: femme Relationship Status: Married Join Date: Nov 2009 Location: back in the land of trees and snow Posts: 2,072 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 8,017 Thanked 5,327 Times in 1,378 Posts Rep Power: 21474854	2am Rising... Just about every night I lay down at a time when my mind is throwing a temper tantrum.. NO NO NO NO it says.. I don't wanna go to bed.. Full blown 3 yr old rage.. Arching back, kicking heels.. I tell it to behave, That we are going to be 40 this year and we must be responsible, do the right thing.. My mind says "NO" loud and beligerent.. It wants to go dancing.. It wants to get into the car and go driving.. It wants to stay up and read.. It wants to talk on the phone.. It wants.. It wants.. It wants to have a later bed time that a 3 yr old.. Just about every night I have to coax my mind to sleep.. Reminding it that we are to old be to telling lies to ourself.. That we will NOT get up if we stay up just a lil longer.. That just a few more mins WILL hurt.. That having something you want comes with a price.. Wanting always has a price... __________________ ~Volunteer~ "It gets in your blood"