Open Letter: Dear Femme

The_Lady_Snow · 12-09-2009, 05:01 PM

*I* Snow a Femme person type, would love to have femme's speak for themselves and NOT take a step back and let or allow the butch talk on their behalf.. For me and this is just me- I don't think and I could be wrong that any butch can honestly speak for me, about me, and about what I experience...

I could be wrong though

blush · 12-09-2009, 05:21 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by The_Lady_Snow

*I* Snow a Femme person type, would love to have femme's speak for themselves and NOT take a step back and let or allow the butch talk on their behalf.. For me and this is just me- I don't think and I could be wrong that any butch can honestly speak for me, about me, and about what I experience...

I could be wrong though

Totally agree.

I certainly don't mind hearing from the "others," but this needs to be a femme-based space. As I said before, I'm mildly curious if these conversations the femmes are having are changing behaviors or attitudes with the "others," but I'm much more curious about our experiences and lives.

Bit, no worries! I re-read my post, and I wasn't clear.

KayCee · 12-10-2009, 09:04 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by The_Lady_Snow

*I* Snow a Femme person type, would love to have femme's speak for themselves and NOT take a step back and let or allow the butch talk on their behalf.. For me and this is just me- I don't think and I could be wrong that any butch can honestly speak for me, about me, and about what I experience...

I could be wrong though

The problem is IMO that we start asking in the first place...femme asks a question..butch answers..

..if we allow it..is another point!

The_Lady_Snow · 12-10-2009, 12:52 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by kat6071

The problem is IMO that we start asking in the first place...femme asks a question..butch answers..

..if we allow it..is another point!

I was wondering if you could clarify I am having a hard time getting this..

Are you saying that femme's should not ask questions?

Sorry it's one of those morning where my brain is just not functioning..

Isadora · 12-10-2009, 01:25 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by kat6071

The problem is IMO that we start asking in the first place...femme asks a question..butch answers..

..if we allow it..is another point!

Quote:

Originally Posted by The_Lady_Snow

I was wondering if you could clarify I am having a hard time getting this..

Are you saying that femme's should not ask questions?

Sorry it's one of those morning where my brain is just not functioning..

I don't get it either. Are you saying that only butches should answer femme questions? Or what Snow said? Or am I just...
dazed and confused, too.

Bit · 12-10-2009, 02:45 PM

Snow, Isa, if I understand right, Kat is saying that we shouldn't be asking the Butches to answer questions about us in this thread.

SuperFemme · 12-10-2009, 03:36 PM

Right. So do we need to clarify that in a clearly Femme id'd space? It seems tiresome to me to have to have a disclaimer of "only femmes answer me please".

SuperFemme · 12-10-2009, 03:42 PM

Has anybody here had the experience of being taken more seriously by both other Femme's and the rest of the community once you are in a long term relationship?

I am coming up on five years with Plato, and finally others have stopped acting like I am out to steal their honey. I personally never think twice about who Plato is around. If hy chose to cheat, that would be on hym. If it was a friend of mine? Same thing. It feels to *me* like there is a tendency to treat others as predators or some such thing.

When I was single I was labeled a slut. I kept hearing about people I'd had sex with. Sigh. Wish I"D BEEN THERE.

Bit · 12-10-2009, 03:43 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Adele

Right. So do we need to clarify that in a clearly Femme id'd space? It seems tiresome to me to have to have a disclaimer of "only femmes answer me please".

I think it's already been clarified, Adele. Multiple people have said in multiple ways, "please, no one speak for us; let us speak for ourselves," and I think probably everyone gets that now.

KayCee · 12-10-2009, 05:49 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Bit

Snow, Isa, if I understand right, Kat is saying that we shouldn't be asking the Butches to answer questions about us in this thread.

Thanks Bit!

Snow, Isa, I was actually quoting you, Snow and I totally agree with you. We need to speak up for ourselves and not let anyone answer for us..no matter who it is. It's not about femme's asking questions, .. it's about letting butches answer for or about us.. We don't need to question ourselves at all....that's what I meant.

sorry for confusion...

Isadora · 12-10-2009, 05:59 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by kat6071

Thanks Bit!

Snow, Isa, I was actually quoting you Snow and I totally agree with you. We need to speak up for ourselves and not let anyone answer for us..no matter who it is. It's not about femme's not asking questions, it's about letting butches answer for or about us..that's what I meant.

sorry for confusion...

No problem. Thank you for clarifying.

The_Lady_Snow · 12-10-2009, 06:15 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by kat6071

Thanks Bit!

Snow, Isa, I was actually quoting you, Snow and I totally agree with you. We need to speak up for ourselves and not let anyone answer for us..no matter who it is. It's not about femme's asking questions, .. it's about letting butches answer for or about us.. We don't need to question ourselves at all....that's what I meant.

sorry for confusion...

Thank you so much for answering Kat!! My brain is in low gear today along with my body

12-09-2009, 05:01 PM	#1
The_Lady_Snow MILLION $$$ PUSSY How Do You Identify?: Kinky, Raw, Perverted, Uber Queer Alpha Femme Preferred Pronoun?: Iconic Ms. Relationship Status: Keeper of 3, only one has the map to my freckles Join Date: Nov 2009 Location: La Reina del Sur Posts: 22,488 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 32,231 Thanked 80,081 Times in 15,669 Posts Rep Power: 21474874	I Snow a Femme person type, would love to have femme's speak for themselves and NOT take a step back and let or allow the butch talk on their behalf.. For me and this is just me- I don't think and I could be wrong that any butch can honestly speak for me, about me, and about what I experience... I could be wrong though

12-10-2009, 02:45 PM	#6
Bit Senior Member How Do You Identify?: Stonefemme Relationship Status: married to Gryph Join Date: Nov 2009 Location: Wichita, KS Posts: 2,177 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 1,126 Thanked 3,770 Times in 1,264 Posts Rep Power: 10778870	Snow, Isa, if I understand right, Kat is saying that we shouldn't be asking the Butches to answer questions about us in this thread.

12-10-2009, 03:36 PM	#7
SuperFemme Timed Out How Do You Identify?: Permanently Banned 10/24/2010 Preferred Pronoun?: She. Relationship Status: Married (one of 18,000) Join Date: Nov 2009 Location: Atascadero, CA Posts: 4,933 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 2,309 Thanked 7,108 Times in 2,327 Posts Rep Power: 0	Right. So do we need to clarify that in a clearly Femme id'd space? It seems tiresome to me to have to have a disclaimer of "only femmes answer me please".

12-10-2009, 03:42 PM	#8
SuperFemme Timed Out How Do You Identify?: Permanently Banned 10/24/2010 Preferred Pronoun?: She. Relationship Status: Married (one of 18,000) Join Date: Nov 2009 Location: Atascadero, CA Posts: 4,933 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 2,309 Thanked 7,108 Times in 2,327 Posts Rep Power: 0	Has anybody here had the experience of being taken more seriously by both other Femme's and the rest of the community once you are in a long term relationship? I am coming up on five years with Plato, and finally others have stopped acting like I am out to steal their honey. I personally never think twice about who Plato is around. If hy chose to cheat, that would be on hym. If it was a friend of mine? Same thing. It feels to me like there is a tendency to treat others as predators or some such thing. When I was single I was labeled a slut. I kept hearing about people I'd had sex with. Sigh. Wish I"D BEEN THERE.