Making Peace with Exes

Soft*Silver · 02-05-2011, 11:28 AM

I have discovered that time is the magic wand. I can pray. I can do therapy. I can sit in AA meetings, confessionals, do 4th, 5th, 6th, ,,8, 9 steps, take revenge, do more steps, move on, fail at more relationships, hunker down, sit celibate, pout, turn green, then blue, go straight, turn right, then left, go back, stop. Find myself. stop running. just sit there. Be. Wait. Let it happen. oh there it is. Forgiveness. Of me.

everything else follows suit...

Kobi · 02-05-2011, 12:55 PM

I'm kind of with Dapper on this one. Except for
prolonged and protracted disengagements, my
contact with exes is limited.

I can be cordial in a social situation we might both be part of,
or acknowledge life events but I don't seek interaction or involvement
beyond that which might happen by accident.

Making peace, to me, is a part of healing. But the healing is not
between us but within each of us. A part of them will always be
a part of me, and their presence in my life will have helped me
become who I am.

But, to me, moving on means letting go of the past and looking
toward the future.

DapperButch · 02-05-2011, 01:12 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Kobi

I'm kind of with Dapper on this one. Except for
prolonged and protracted disengagements, my
contact with exes is limited.

I can be cordial in a social situation we might both be part of,
or acknowledge life events but I don't seek interaction or involvement
beyond that which might happen by accident.

Making peace, to me, is a part of healing. But the healing is not
between us but within each of us.

That last sentence is an excellent way to put it.

A part of them will always be a part of me, and their presence in my life will have helped me
become who I am.

Absolutely.

But, to me, moving on means letting go of the past and looking
toward the future.

Yes, that is how I see it too (however, I wouldn't say as a general rule that being a friend with an ex means you are not "moving on", but yes, I get what you are saying and that is the end that I am on)

----------------------

Soft*Silver · 02-05-2011, 04:58 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by DapperButch

----------------------

what does this mean?

Soft*Silver · 02-05-2011, 07:37 PM

I would so like to say I did too many drugs when i was younger but really, it was just a stupid moment for me...lol...thank you!

Quote:

Originally Posted by June

Softness -- Dapper responded in red inside Kobi's post, then had to do ---------------------- so it would post. Otherwise, there is a message that you have too few characters

bigbutchmistie · 02-05-2011, 08:00 PM

Im so glad I was able to part friends with most of my ex's...

I really enjoy their friendships more than I did the relationship...

Gráinne · 02-06-2011, 12:56 AM

I'm very amicable with my childrens' father. I respect him deeply and he's a great guy. It's just that obviously, I wasn't able to love him in all ways that a woman loves a man.

Another "ex"-I say "ex", because we talked about a relationship and were intimate, but in the end decided that neither of us were in a good place to be in one. She and I are great friends to this day. There was no animosity, just lousy timing.

02-05-2011, 11:28 AM	#1
SoftSilver Infamous Member How Do You Identify?: femme Preferred Pronoun?: she Relationship Status: Married Join Date: Nov 2009 Location: rose cottage Posts: 5,592 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 8,948 Thanked 15,894 Times in 4,062 Posts Rep Power*: 21474857	I have discovered that time is the magic wand. I can pray. I can do therapy. I can sit in AA meetings, confessionals, do 4th, 5th, 6th, ,,8, 9 steps, take revenge, do more steps, move on, fail at more relationships, hunker down, sit celibate, pout, turn green, then blue, go straight, turn right, then left, go back, stop. Find myself. stop running. just sit there. Be. Wait. Let it happen. oh there it is. Forgiveness. Of me. everything else follows suit... __________________ Pole bachit, a lis chuye. The field sees, the forest hears

02-05-2011, 12:55 PM	#2
Kobi Infamous Member How Do You Identify?: Biological female. Lesbian. Relationship Status: Happy Join Date: Feb 2010 Location: Hanging out in the Atlantic. Posts: 9,234 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 9,840 Thanked 34,617 Times in 7,640 Posts Rep Power: 21474860	I'm kind of with Dapper on this one. Except for prolonged and protracted disengagements, my contact with exes is limited. I can be cordial in a social situation we might both be part of, or acknowledge life events but I don't seek interaction or involvement beyond that which might happen by accident. Making peace, to me, is a part of healing. But the healing is not between us but within each of us. A part of them will always be a part of me, and their presence in my life will have helped me become who I am. But, to me, moving on means letting go of the past and looking toward the future. __________________

02-06-2011, 12:56 AM	#7
Gráinne Senior Member How Do You Identify?: Neither, nada, out of the box Preferred Pronoun?: My name always works Relationship Status: Happy whatever happens Join Date: Dec 2010 Location: Little Rock Posts: 1,864 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 2,117 Thanked 7,386 Times in 1,457 Posts Rep Power: 21474852	I'm very amicable with my childrens' father. I respect him deeply and he's a great guy. It's just that obviously, I wasn't able to love him in all ways that a woman loves a man. Another "ex"-I say "ex", because we talked about a relationship and were intimate, but in the end decided that neither of us were in a good place to be in one. She and I are great friends to this day. There was no animosity, just lousy timing. __________________ The odds of going to the store for a loaf of bread and coming out with only a loaf of bread are three billion to one. ~Erma Bombeck

02-05-2011, 08:00 PM	#6
bigbutchmistie Senior Member How Do You Identify?: Since You Need A Label. Butch Relationship Status: Still Dreaming Of My Happily Ever After Join Date: Nov 2009 Location: Arlington Texas Posts: 4,009 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 4,950 Thanked 5,364 Times in 1,941 Posts Rep Power: 21474856	Im so glad I was able to part friends with most of my ex's... I really enjoy their friendships more than I did the relationship...