Age... an issue?

[Pixie]

Originally Posted by The_Lady_Snow

This is true!!! I know 60 year olds who act like my 10 year old!! I have that rule for me cause my oldest is gonna be' 25 and that would be akward for them and well their comfort is more important for me than a good time. It's even hard with Nico & Cassi being in their age range, they are all literally growing up together!

I can understand that for sure!

[proximitywithoutintimacy]

Hey, thanks for all the replies!

Quite honestly, for me, I've found that people who have more life experience are the ones who are mature beyond their age. I'm 24 years old, and I feel a lot older spiritually, if that makes any sense - one of my closest friends is 26, her friends are 29, and I'm becoming slowly immersed into their circle. Don't get me wrong, I love my best friend to death (she's also 24) but I feel as though I'm outgrowing her. I think age, or rather, maturity levels play a part in both friendships and relationships.

[adorable]

Age matters for me. I don't date anyone my age. They must be significantly older or younger.

It doesn't work for me any other way.

[Rockinonahigh]

Age should be just a number,but as I get older it becomes more of an issue,maturity or lack there of dosent come with age..beleve me its so true.I have dated ppl close to my age thrue a bit older,I wonder if any of them very reached any reasonable maturity at all.Thats not to say ppl my age arent mature cause many are.Also I get the second child hood haveing a great old time now that folks reach an age thats kids are grown,now retired ect.I shure dont act my age but also I really dont have a 454 engine anymore,more like a 2cylendar squrril cage motor energy leval.What I have found has been pouty,spoiled,grumpy folks..Dateing starts out fine then they morph into something I would rather not be around and im not for long.

[AtLast]

For me personally, it is. I'm not comfortable with involvement with anyone younger than my kid (he is 42). On the older than me side of things, I can't see me being involved with anyone more than 5-7 years older. But, this depends a lot on how active they are. I'll be 60 next week, am in good shape but do have some limitations and I wouldn't do well with a couch potato. I know 70 year olds that can put 30 year olds to shame.

I don't have "moral" issues with large age differences per se. I know couples with many years between them that seem to do fine. I just don't want to be with someone a lot younger or older than myself.

[Corkey]

I have issues with age every day.....

Seriously, I never dated out of my generation, too much stuff that is lost in translation. I know 60 year olds who are immature, it has nothing to do with maturity, tho sometimes it does.

[AtLast]

Originally Posted by Corkey

I have issues with age every day.....

Seriously, I never dated out of my generation, too much stuff that is lost in translation. I know 60 year olds who are immature, it has nothing to do with maturity, tho sometimes it does.

Yes, "lost in translation" is a really good way to put it. We do have age cohort dynamics that are significant.

I do have friends that are much younger and older- each is unique in many aspects of their age "group" and relating as friends is great. I enjoy hearing about generational distinctions no matter what the generation. I just don't want my partner of intimacy too far away from my age group.

Yes, lost in translation is a really good way to put this. Not really about maturity at all. As I said before, I know people all over the map as far as maturity level goes. But, developmental phases and "milestones" feel significant to me when I think about all of this.

Also, I'm retired and at tha time of my life that I don't have to be tied to a job/career. and I am no longer professionaly motivated. If I were with a woman that was still very much involved in her work, it wouldn't work for either one of us. Just like being with someone with young children wouldn't work. I don't have to be responsible for my kid any longer- he has his own life.

So much of this has to do with where we are in our lives. I have turned away from dating some really wonderful women because I felt that these kinds of things would make it impossible for me to commit to them. I can't ask someone to change their goals in their work for me. And I am a monogamous person that is pretty traditional in terms of relationships. I like building a home and history with someone. That is not how everyone relates (nor should it be).

Also, I have to say that as I have gotten older, I find that there are many more things I honestly just don't want to deal with that I would when I was younger.

I think where these kinds of discussions get off in negative directions is when we attach any kind of judgement to age difference. To me, its about lifestyle and life stages (and the wants and needs we have) that are the major factors about age disparate relationships. I have my own rule about not dating anyone my son's age or younger, but I am applying that to myself and in way I choose to live at this life's stage.

Why we focus on this issue so much in terms of the numbers instead of looking at what fits with where we are in our lives doesn't make sense to me sometimes.

I'm not sure if I am explaining this clearly.... just wish we could get away from judgement and talk about all the other issues involved with this topic.

Oh, and Corkey- I'm in no way think your post was judgemental- I really like your "translation" idea and I just got off on the rest of my post after letting you know this.... just 'cause that is where my mind went.

[citybutch]

Just wait until you are getting your AARP card... THEN you will feel like you are 24!

Originally Posted by proximitywithoutintimacy

I'm 24 years old, and I feel a lot older spiritually, if that makes any sense

[wolfbittenpoet]

I want my aarp card. It has such beautiful discounts.

[Apocalipstic]

On Bones they said a Cougar could date someone half their age plus seven, I am going with that.

[blondqtpie]

I am with a beautiful boi that is 14 years my senior. Have known her since I was 20.
Age don't matter !
Love is Love no matter what age.

[dixie]

Originally Posted by citybutch

Just wait until you are getting your AARP card... THEN you will feel like you are 24!

Originally Posted by wolfbittenpoet

I want my aarp card. It has such beautiful discounts.

I'm not even 32 yet and am already getting AARP fliers. What's that all about?? lol

[prettylilgrrl]

I have always found myself attracted to older than I am . It seems as though anyone younger than me is too immature and still into games and drama.

[Quintease]

I've become a cougar, but I don't think that's a bad thing. Every time I've dated older than myself there has been endless d r a m a. I don't seem able to fall into bed with someone older than myself without finding one with some kind of mental or emotional issue which she then expects me to put up with. No no no.. I like younger. They own their drama, they're flexible, they're open to change, they're creative in bed, they're fun!

Of course when I say older and younger I may be exaggerating. I've never dated more than 10 years older and 6 years younger. So really I like people roughly my age.

It's true about the older/younger sanity divide however, I don't know what it is but my this-person-is-a-nutter radar appears to switch off whenever someone is (even slightly) my elder.