I'd Like to Claim I was Drunk: Pick Up Lines Destined to Fail

uglyboi · 05-19-2011, 08:21 PM

Can I buy you a drink or do you just want the money?

Selenay · 01-25-2012, 11:39 AM

Hey baby, I left my scarf at home; can I wrap your legs around me instead?

kannon · 01-25-2012, 11:45 AM

Motion for her to come over with the finger "come here" sign. If she does, tell her, "I just wanted to see if I could I could make you come with my finger. Looks like I can. My fingers work even better in the bed."

WARNING: This drunken line is sure to evoke a strong emotional reaction of some sort.

WomenMoveMe · 01-25-2012, 12:17 PM

I took my forefinger...put it to my lips...and softly licked it. Then put the wet finger to her shirt. Looked right into her eyes and said "we really should get you out of these wet things".

or...

"You need me".

starryeyes · 01-25-2012, 01:12 PM

If I even attempted to say a pick-up line, which probably would never happen... I would probably get a red face, start giggling and just walk away like an idiot. Sexy huh?

:-D

tapu · 01-25-2012, 02:50 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by starryeyes

If I even attempted to say a pick-up line, which probably would never happen... I would probably get a red face, start giggling and just walk away like an idiot. Sexy huh?

:-D

That would work on me.

tapu · 01-25-2012, 01:12 PM

"You are so in my mating pool."

tapu · 01-25-2012, 01:14 PM

This one usually works really, really well (go figure); but oh boy, when it goes bad...

"Ya wanna' date me? I'll let ya."

Ciaran · 01-25-2012, 02:28 PM

This one can work (if the recipient understands irony which is a big if)

"You're not great looking, but there's not much to choose from here."

Also, potential to work with someone who hasn't had a humour bypass:

"If I offer you the chance to come home with me tonight, is it okay if you made up the bed again in the morning?"

tapu · 01-25-2012, 02:49 PM

Where I'm from, it's customary to exchange watches with someone you've just met....

(It was Southern California--everyone had a Rolex except me. Actually, did I even have a watch?)

-- tapu, Accomplished PUA

RNguy · 01-19-2015, 01:26 AM

In WV and KY you will hear this said:
" baby, you look like someone whooped up on you with the pretty stick "

I did say it to Laney_Doll once to see what she would say and I think it was...
"Good Lord baby"

Gemme · 01-19-2015, 07:45 PM

Hopefully no one gets the ugly stick and the pretty stick confused.

Bard · 01-19-2015, 07:50 PM

Excuse me did you eat breakfast? Was it lucky charms, because you look magically delicious?

RNguy · 01-20-2015, 04:03 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Gemme

Hopefully no one gets the ugly stick and the pretty stick confused.

Well it is Appalachia !!!!

05-19-2011, 08:21 PM	#1
uglyboi Member How Do You Identify?: As the 'The Bourne Identity' Preferred Pronoun?: Cheerful pessimist Relationship Status: Married Join Date: May 2011 Location: In a house we bought Posts: 411 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 294 Thanked 1,208 Times in 327 Posts Rep Power: 18936851	Works everytime Can I buy you a drink or do you just want the money?

01-25-2012, 11:39 AM	#2
Selenay Member How Do You Identify?: A soul for a compass and a heart for a pair of wings. Preferred Pronoun?: All I ask of living is to have no chains on me. Relationship Status: All I own are the strides I spend to the finish line. Join Date: Nov 2009 Location: Somewhere in between here and gone. Posts: 662 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 110 Thanked 1,447 Times in 369 Posts Rep Power: 6344715	Hey baby, I left my scarf at home; can I wrap your legs around me instead? __________________ Two or three things I know for sure, And one is that I would rather go naked Than wear the coat the world has made for me.

01-25-2012, 11:45 AM	#3
kannon Member How Do You Identify?: bloke Preferred Pronoun?: He Relationship Status: Happy is the heart that believes in angels Join Date: Oct 2010 Location: Land of Milk and Honey Posts: 884 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 1,920 Thanked 2,066 Times in 584 Posts Rep Power: 21474851	Motion for her to come over with the finger "come here" sign. If she does, tell her, "I just wanted to see if I could I could make you come with my finger. Looks like I can. My fingers work even better in the bed." WARNING: This drunken line is sure to evoke a strong emotional reaction of some sort. __________________ Sticking feathers up your butt does not make you a chicken.

01-25-2012, 12:17 PM	#4
WomenMoveMe Member How Do You Identify?: I just wander about and be! Relationship Status: Caution: Dead End Join Date: Oct 2011 Location: Kentucky Posts: 561 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 1,473 Thanked 2,099 Times in 417 Posts Rep Power: 21474850	Pick-ups I took my forefinger...put it to my lips...and softly licked it. Then put the wet finger to her shirt. Looked right into her eyes and said "we really should get you out of these wet things". or... "You need me".

01-25-2012, 01:12 PM	#5
starryeyes Senior Member How Do You Identify?: a round peg in a square hole Preferred Pronoun?: Guess... Relationship Status: Seat taken Join Date: May 2011 Location: Rocky Mountain High Posts: 2,491 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 2,199 Thanked 10,050 Times in 2,076 Posts Rep Power: 21474853	If I even attempted to say a pick-up line, which probably would never happen... I would probably get a red face, start giggling and just walk away like an idiot. Sexy huh? :-D __________________ "It's ok to make mistakes. It's ok to fall down. Get up! Look sickening....and make them eat it!" - Latrice Royale Starry

01-25-2012, 01:12 PM	#7
tapu Senior Member How Do You Identify?: Understated butch. Preferred Pronoun?: I Relationship Status: Party of One Join Date: Jun 2011 Location: Maine Posts: 1,654 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 1,324 Thanked 3,115 Times in 1,103 Posts Rep Power: 21474852	"You are so in my mating pool." __________________ Really? That's not funny to you? Last edited by tapu; 01-25-2012 at 01:15 PM.

01-25-2012, 01:14 PM	#8
tapu Senior Member How Do You Identify?: Understated butch. Preferred Pronoun?: I Relationship Status: Party of One Join Date: Jun 2011 Location: Maine Posts: 1,654 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 1,324 Thanked 3,115 Times in 1,103 Posts Rep Power: 21474852	This one usually works really, really well (go figure); but oh boy, when it goes bad... "Ya wanna' date me? I'll let ya." __________________ Really? That's not funny to you?

01-25-2012, 02:28 PM	#9
Ciaran Member How Do You Identify?: Altocalciphilic Preferred Pronoun?: Papa Smurf Relationship Status: Curmudgeonous spinster Join Date: Nov 2009 Location: London (but from Belfast) Posts: 678 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 471 Thanked 3,654 Times in 602 Posts Rep Power: 21474852	This one can work (if the recipient understands irony which is a big if) "You're not great looking, but there's not much to choose from here." Also, potential to work with someone who hasn't had a humour bypass: "If I offer you the chance to come home with me tonight, is it okay if you made up the bed again in the morning?"

01-25-2012, 02:49 PM	#10
tapu Senior Member How Do You Identify?: Understated butch. Preferred Pronoun?: I Relationship Status: Party of One Join Date: Jun 2011 Location: Maine Posts: 1,654 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 1,324 Thanked 3,115 Times in 1,103 Posts Rep Power: 21474852	Where I'm from, it's customary to exchange watches with someone you've just met.... (It was Southern California--everyone had a Rolex except me. Actually, did I even have a watch?) -- tapu, Accomplished PUA __________________ Really? That's not funny to you?

01-19-2015, 01:26 AM	#11
RNguy Member How Do You Identify?: trans Preferred Pronoun?: He preferredably :) Relationship Status: the pitbull <€ Join Date: Dec 2009 Location: Birmingham, Alabama Posts: 1,058 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 3,473 Thanked 2,266 Times in 510 Posts Rep Power: 21474853	In WV and KY you will hear this said: " baby, you look like someone whooped up on you with the pretty stick " I did say it to Laney_Doll once to see what she would say and I think it was... "Good Lord baby" __________________

01-19-2015, 07:45 PM	#12
Gemme Practically Lives Here How Do You Identify?: Queer Stone Femme Girl of the Unicorn Variety Preferred Pronoun?: She, as in 'She's a GEM' Join Date: Nov 2009 Location: The roads are narrow here Posts: 36,631 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 182,498 Thanked 107,926 Times in 25,667 Posts Rep Power: 21474887	Hopefully no one gets the ugly stick and the pretty stick confused. __________________ Gemme's Journal I'm misunderestimated.

01-19-2015, 07:50 PM	#13
Bard Family Man How Do You Identify?: TG Male Preferred Pronoun?: Masculine ones Relationship Status: She just gets me Join Date: Nov 2009 Location: ..... Posts: 2,828 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 2,997 Thanked 12,786 Times in 2,431 Posts Rep Power: 21474854	Excuse me did you eat breakfast? Was it lucky charms, because you look magically delicious? __________________ This is ten percent luck, twenty percent skill Fifteen percent concentrated power of will Five percent pleasure, fifty percent pain And a hundred percent reason to remember the name! Give yourself over to absolute pleasure. Swim the warm waters of sins of the flesh - erotic nightmares beyond any measure, and sensual daydreams to treasure forever. Can't you just see it? Don't dream it, be it.