Adult Children Moving Home

jelli · 07-12-2011, 03:43 PM

The end of May our son, G(19yrs old), and his "supposedly" pregnant and recently married(17 yr old) other half moved in with us. They are supposed to stay just long enough to get some money saved and get into a place of their own.

I had her go for a pregnancy confirmation and guess what? Negative. Son is bothered by it, but states he still loves her and wants to be with her.

All I asked was for her to be taking her birth control, her Seroquel, and get some counseling. Our son has become somewhat passive aggressive with her in order to "keep the piece".

Well, I don't want to raise his wife. So periodically we have to have a "come to jesus" meeting.

Yes, drama.

Blade · 07-12-2011, 04:06 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by jelli

The end of May our son, G(19yrs old), and his "supposedly" pregnant and recently married(17 yr old) other half moved in with us. They are supposed to stay just long enough to get some money saved and get into a place of their own.

I had her go for a pregnancy confirmation and guess what? Negative. Son is bothered by it, but states he still loves her and wants to be with her.

All I asked was for her to be taking her birth control, her Seroquel, and get some counseling. Our son has become somewhat passive aggressive with her in order to "keep the piece".

Well, I don't want to raise his wife. So periodically we have to have a "come to jesus" meeting.Yes, drama.

Jelli I think it is hard anytime you have a family member move in with you, not just an adult child. However yes my son came back home for a short period when he was 24. I told him the rules were still the same as always. He stayed about 2 months and got a job and moved out. I've always been a strict parent and they know I mean business and I command their respect.

jelli · 08-05-2011, 08:39 PM

Our son, Garrett(19), married *J* just over 2 months ago, in Michigan, because she claimed she was pregnant. He did/does care about her, but stated he did not want kids nor would he have gotten married. He was trying to do the right thing he claimed.

Once married they relocated here with us. this was for Garrett to get a good job, save, and get a place of their own. Since they've moved here this girl has been nothing but an emotional roller coaster. She supposedly is bipolar or BPD. Totally disruptive, but then can go to miss sweet and innocent butt kisser in the blink of an eye.

Regardless of the amount of assistance and resources you give her she fails to do anything with them unless you call her out. Then she will temporarily appear to be getting her poop in a group, usually long enough for you to be distracted/forget, and then the cycle repeats. we have had so many conversations, family meetings, etc. it goes nowhere, but in a circle.

Lies, blame, snarky, temper tantrums, not saving a dime, trying to get info on Garrett's accounts(his company called him to verify), truly seems like she is 5. Their accounts are separate because he believes she stole a coin that he had and gave to her addict family.

Garrett knows she had lied on more than one occasion about circumstances, but the pregnancy and emotional side put it over the top. He called MI and they stated he would have to discuss with an attorney to even find out if he qualified for an annulment or if he would have to get an attorney for a divorce. Spoke to a local attorney and she mentioned about SC being a no contest state and that they would have to live apart one year before he'd ever see a courtroom.

He wants to send her back to Michigan relatively soon. Soon as in by Sunday.

He plans to do this in a way that there may potential for her to step up and take responsibility for herself and her actions. The ball would be in her court to do the things such as counseling, meds, birth control, school, etc to see if she is actually serious and committed. They can get together periodically to check progress. If not, then they're still been living apart like they would need for a divorce.

I explained you can do whatever you want your relationship/marriage, but you can't do it here because I do not choose to live with her anymore.

I feel bad for him. All he was trying to do was 'the right thing' since she was 'supposedly pregnant'.

Peach · 09-06-2013, 10:27 AM

Since there is no baby on the way (if I read it right) then ask them to move out. Make sure your son is taking responsibility for birth control, she does not seem capable, and might keep trying to get pregnant to tie him to her still. He should have insisted she pee on the stick and prove the pregnancy before marrying her, but....water under the bridge now. Make sure he keeps his eyes open to her!

The_Lady_Snow · 09-06-2013, 10:29 AM

Speaking of preggo tests..

Today I learned that you can buy +preggo tests on craigslist..........

<-- my why am I not cross posting face...

Breathless · 09-06-2013, 10:36 AM

!

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Speaking of preggo tests..

Today I learned that you can buy +preggo tests on craigslist..........

<-- my why am I not cross posting face...

that is ewwwwww super gross, and wrong on sooo many levels!!

Peach · 09-06-2013, 10:44 AM

I heard this on the news yesterday. i have to say, if I were a guy, who needed proof of pregnancy, knowing this, I would insist on seeing the pee on the stick actually happen. What people won't do these day eh?

Quote:

Originally Posted by The_Lady_Snow

Speaking of preggo tests..

Today I learned that you can buy +preggo tests on craigslist..........

<-- my why am I not cross posting face...

Amber2010 · 09-06-2013, 12:20 PM

I am not sure if this counts but I have three kids two older girls and one son. Well the son is getting ready to turn 25 and is still living at home. Yes he was in college and does pay his own bills but it can't be healthy to live at home.
I do understand the way things are out there and how hard it is to take care of yourself. If it was better I would have been gone long ago. pfft
I just wonder how kids now a day can call themselves adults and still live at home and have the parent or parents take care of the?

07-12-2011, 03:43 PM	#1
jelli Member How Do You Identify?: Femmilicious Preferred Pronoun?: she Relationship Status: And you said I wasn’t your type!!! Join Date: Jul 2011 Location: SC Posts: 836 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 1,758 Thanked 1,079 Times in 377 Posts Rep Power: 16588549	never thought it would happen, but... The end of May our son, G(19yrs old), and his "supposedly" pregnant and recently married(17 yr old) other half moved in with us. They are supposed to stay just long enough to get some money saved and get into a place of their own. I had her go for a pregnancy confirmation and guess what? Negative. Son is bothered by it, but states he still loves her and wants to be with her. All I asked was for her to be taking her birth control, her Seroquel, and get some counseling. Our son has become somewhat passive aggressive with her in order to "keep the piece". Well, I don't want to raise his wife. So periodically we have to have a "come to jesus" meeting. Yes, drama. __________________ “Sometimes we make the right decision; sometimes we make the decision right.” “Every conflict is a lesson in self-discovery for both of us. Sometimes it's only hindsight that makes it worth it. For you, I would do it all again.“

08-05-2011, 08:39 PM	#3
jelli Member How Do You Identify?: Femmilicious Preferred Pronoun?: she Relationship Status: And you said I wasn’t your type!!! Join Date: Jul 2011 Location: SC Posts: 836 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 1,758 Thanked 1,079 Times in 377 Posts Rep Power: 16588549	Enough is enough... Our son, Garrett(19), married J just over 2 months ago, in Michigan, because she claimed she was pregnant. He did/does care about her, but stated he did not want kids nor would he have gotten married. He was trying to do the right thing he claimed. Once married they relocated here with us. this was for Garrett to get a good job, save, and get a place of their own. Since they've moved here this girl has been nothing but an emotional roller coaster. She supposedly is bipolar or BPD. Totally disruptive, but then can go to miss sweet and innocent butt kisser in the blink of an eye. Regardless of the amount of assistance and resources you give her she fails to do anything with them unless you call her out. Then she will temporarily appear to be getting her poop in a group, usually long enough for you to be distracted/forget, and then the cycle repeats. we have had so many conversations, family meetings, etc. it goes nowhere, but in a circle. Lies, blame, snarky, temper tantrums, not saving a dime, trying to get info on Garrett's accounts(his company called him to verify), truly seems like she is 5. Their accounts are separate because he believes she stole a coin that he had and gave to her addict family. Garrett knows she had lied on more than one occasion about circumstances, but the pregnancy and emotional side put it over the top. He called MI and they stated he would have to discuss with an attorney to even find out if he qualified for an annulment or if he would have to get an attorney for a divorce. Spoke to a local attorney and she mentioned about SC being a no contest state and that they would have to live apart one year before he'd ever see a courtroom. He wants to send her back to Michigan relatively soon. Soon as in by Sunday. He plans to do this in a way that there may potential for her to step up and take responsibility for herself and her actions. The ball would be in her court to do the things such as counseling, meds, birth control, school, etc to see if she is actually serious and committed. They can get together periodically to check progress. If not, then they're still been living apart like they would need for a divorce. I explained you can do whatever you want your relationship/marriage, but you can't do it here because I do not choose to live with her anymore. I feel bad for him. All he was trying to do was 'the right thing' since she was 'supposedly pregnant'. __________________ “Sometimes we make the right decision; sometimes we make the decision right.” “Every conflict is a lesson in self-discovery for both of us. Sometimes it's only hindsight that makes it worth it. For you, I would do it all again.“

09-06-2013, 10:29 AM	#5
The_Lady_Snow MILLION $$$ PUSSY How Do You Identify?: Kinky, Raw, Perverted, Uber Queer Alpha Femme Preferred Pronoun?: Iconic Ms. Relationship Status: Keeper of 3, only one has the map to my freckles Join Date: Nov 2009 Location: La Reina del Sur Posts: 22,488 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 32,231 Thanked 80,077 Times in 15,670 Posts Rep Power: 21474875	Yikes! Speaking of preggo tests.. Today I learned that you can buy +preggo tests on craigslist.......... <-- my why am I not cross posting face... __________________ "If you’re going to play these dirty games of ours, then you might as well indulge completely. It’s all about turning back into an animal and that’s the beauty of it. Place your guilt on the sidewalk and take a blow torch to it (guilt is usually worthless anyway). Be perverted, be filthy, do things that mannered people shouldn’t do. If you’re going to be gross then go for it and don’t wimp out."---Master Aiden

09-06-2013, 10:36 AM	#6
Breathless Brat Extraordinaire How Do You Identify?: Femme Preferred Pronoun?: She, her Relationship Status: Happy Tournaments Won: 23 Join Date: Mar 2011 Location: Alberta Canada Posts: 1,412 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 7,549 Thanked 4,098 Times in 958 Posts Rep Power: 21474852	! -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Speaking of preggo tests.. Today I learned that you can buy +preggo tests on craigslist.......... <-- my why am I not cross posting face... that is ewwwwww super gross, and wrong on sooo many levels!! __________________ *BE the change you wish to see in the world. Gandhi*

09-06-2013, 10:27 AM	#4
Peach Member How Do You Identify?: femme Relationship Status: happily married Join Date: Nov 2009 Location: where my hat is Posts: 173 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 69 Thanked 640 Times in 129 Posts Rep Power: 5775547	Since there is no baby on the way (if I read it right) then ask them to move out. Make sure your son is taking responsibility for birth control, she does not seem capable, and might keep trying to get pregnant to tie him to her still. He should have insisted she pee on the stick and prove the pregnancy before marrying her, but....water under the bridge now. Make sure he keeps his eyes open to her!

09-06-2013, 12:20 PM	#8
Amber2010 Member How Do You Identify?: Happy, Crazy, Bubbly, Funny, Strong, Outgoing, Friendly Preferred Pronoun?: Femme Relationship Status: Complicated Join Date: Jun 2011 Location: Florida Posts: 200 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 920 Thanked 594 Times in 154 Posts Rep Power: 3787185	I am not sure if this counts but I have three kids two older girls and one son. Well the son is getting ready to turn 25 and is still living at home. Yes he was in college and does pay his own bills but it can't be healthy to live at home. I do understand the way things are out there and how hard it is to take care of yourself. If it was better I would have been gone long ago. pfft I just wonder how kids now a day can call themselves adults and still live at home and have the parent or parents take care of the?