being disabled....

[Soft*Silver]

I hate the way pot makes me feel in my head but I love the way it helps my body. On very rare occassions when the pain was too much for me to endure and the damn PCP wouldnt give me pain meds, I resorted to pot. I havent had to do that for a few months since the gastric surgery because i had a long script for vicodine but thats almost out. So now I have to use pot or find a new PCP...which I wanted to do anyway.

I hate the feeling of being high. I am also in recovery and have an ethical delimma about using pot, even if it is to alleviate pain. Because I loathe it so much, i dont consider it a break in my sobriety. Its also no different than the vicodine. Its for the pain. There have been times it kept me from chewing my fingers down to the knuckles.