Healthy Weight Loss

Nina · 07-19-2011, 11:29 PM

maybe it's not 'over share'...maybe it's a freeing part of the process of integrating ourselves...the divide between who we are and our body can be huge and impacting...

maybe as we learn about the disconnect...as we learn how and when we have spent years numbing our feelings with food and all else, when we can identify it, and see it with compassion, we speak of it to take it out of darkness and shame...we share it because it frees us from the emotions and reactions that keep us tied to fear and hurt...

I don't know...it seems like when we define what we do as 'over sharing' there is, intrinsic in that phrase a judgement which maybe we don't need to put on ourselves...

I am tired right now...I would probably not post this otherwise, but I am going to do so anyway...I admire you all for what you're doing to find a path to more balance, and a way to cherish the vessel which houses the You...I struggle with it, I think many of us do...and I am in awe at how this space is becoming a space of courage, and love and throwing off shame and wrong messages and helps us move into a space of love and of pride...

JustJo · 07-20-2011, 06:55 AM

I'm with Nina....overshare sounds like a bad thing...and I think freeing up and speaking about who we are and how we feel is good, good, good.

So...yes, let's talk about emotional eating.

Mine goes back so far it feels like part of my DNA. Food was always the way to smooth over the gaps and the pain in my life as a kid and especially as a teenager. It was always there, right? That Ding Dong didn't insult or bully or leave me feeling unimportant or left out or, or, or.....it just sat there full of creamy filling and chocolate, all wrapped up (then) in a neat shiny little foil package, whenever I wanted it (or could get my hands on it....another story).

I've always been heavy...some times heavier than others....but I was never the athletic type (even though I rode horses and swam like a fish) or slim. I weighed 130 lbs and wore a size 12 when I was 12 years old...then kept growing. At my heaviest I stopped weighing myself or buying clothes and became of a fan of the mu-mu/caftan/long, loose and swishy stuff that didn't make me beat myself up with the knowledge that I had gone past size 24.

At one point in my late 20s I resolved that I was going to change, and never look like that again. I was dating a man that was into body-building. We lived on broiled fish (no butter or oil) and salad with a squeeze of lemon....not kidding....that was lunch and dinner. We went to the gym every day and worked out for 3 solid hours. I ached. I felt starved and hungry and deprived every waking moment. I was angry at the entire world and everyone in it that could eat a cheeseburger and still look "normal." I got down to a size 14, and weighed 155. People told me I looked fantastic. I loved hearing that (since I never had), but hated every other moment and myself for having to live such an austere and unpleasant (for me) existence in order to look "acceptable."

Needless to say, I fell off the wagon (and broke up with the body-builder too).

I gained weight....up and down a little....hovered around 200 lbs. most of the time, for years but felt like myself. Gradually it crept up, and up....

I weighed about 245 lbs. when I was diagnosed with diabetes...and it scared me to death. My aunt died the most awful death imaginable from diabetic complications. Mine was showing mostly in my eyes....diabetic retinopathy...and a firm message that, if I did not get my blood sugar under control, I would go blind. Turns out, based on the damage to my eyes, that I probably was an undiagnosed diabetic for about 20 years....back to my early 20's....maybe earlier.

I went on the diabetic diet, walked an hour a day....and lost 50 lbs. That helped, but it wasn't enough to control my blood sugar. They added meds....lots of meds....but thankfully not injected insulin. As needle-phobic as I am, that would be a disaster on too many levels to even think about.

I measured fats in teaspoons, weighed my food, counted my food....hated my food. I developed an intense depression....once again hating a world where "everyone else" could eat normally, or whatever they wanted, or *fill in the blank* and be normal and attractive and relatively healthy....and my body sabotaged me. Honestly, the only thing that kept me from being suicidal was my son. Rooster was 6, and I wanted to live long enough to see him grow up....and I wanted to see him, too. I couldn't let this thing make me blind. I also couldn't continue to live the way I was. I needed to find that happy medium...that place that Medusa describes...where I could have cake if there was an occasion for cake, or even just a strong desire for it....where food became just food...and not my enemy...where my body became my friend, and not my saboteur.

That was about 8 years ago.

I've regained a little of the weight I lost. I'm working on losing it again.

I've also accepted the fact that I am diabetic, and that (unless there's a miracle) won't change. I need to find a way to live with it, and not let it take me out.

I also have to be able to live my life...eat food...have pleasure.

I have to strike a balance.

Zimmeh · 07-20-2011, 08:14 AM

Growing up, I was a very active child. I was still *chunky* as the pictures show from that time. When I was 15, I was hit by a car coming home from school. It nearly broke both of my legs, caused my L5 and L6 vertebrae to become fused and threw my hips off a little; also watched my parents marriage fail and was taking out of my comfort zone to Michigan; a place where the other students made fun of me because of my Southern accent. As a result of the accident, I couldn't walk without a limp for a long time and I still do. I found that food was my only friend and that it wouldn't like Jo Jo said, make fun of me. Before the accident, I weighed in at 110lbs on a 5'0" frame. After the accident, I weighed anywhere from 150lbs to 210lbs<as of January 2007> on my short body. I did the whole yo yo diet and kept falling off of the wagon. My family didn't eat healthy and it was hard to watch them eat, fried chicken, red meat, and other unhealthy foods and not want to have some.

I've also had to come to terms with a lot of emotional stuff that I had stored in my head. Stuff that everyday, when I look at myself in the mirror, and I say outloud, you won't control my life anymore. I have also kicked all of the negative people out of my life and replaced them with positive people...

I have found that since I took control of my life in January 2007 and made the decision, that I wasn't going to pass away at the age of 47, like my dad. I have taking every measure that I can to loose the weight and if I gain back a few pounds, then I say ok, "what can I do to loose this weight?" I have learned that emotionally kicking my own ass isn't a good thing and I am trying to stop this. Once my health insurance kicks in mid August, I am going to see if a Dietician and Nutrionist is covered and I will be going to them. I have been able to keep 45lbs of the original 60lbs off. My friend says, that I have such a strong will power and that I can avoid consuming food that isn't good for me. Yes I still eat my chocolate and ice cream, but I always either end the day or start the day, with a nice long power walk and I always run up the stairs once I am finished.

We can overcome what emotional shit lies underneath our *over eating* and we can and will show the world, that it truly is mind over matter...Maybe one day, we can help other people out; people who don't have access to Weight Watchers or other weight loss groups. I know, I am one of those people and I have found, this thread, to be the best!

Thank you Jo Jo for starting this thread,

Zimmy

ReDo · 07-20-2011, 09:07 AM

Zimmy

Congratulations on keeping the weight off. I know that for me is the hardest part. I can exercise lose the weight and then put it back on. As if I never really learn how to have a healthy lifestyle instead only go through the motions to change my body for the moment. This time I want so much more than that.

I am so determined and a fighter in that it takes a great deal for me to not follow through when my mind is made up.

Hack · 07-20-2011, 04:05 PM

I eat low-fat, no sugar, low carb, no salt. I drink water (trying to increase this) and Diet Coke. Skip dessert (or have just berries).

I did Weight Watchers on and off the last ten years. Found it too easy to fall off the wagon. Twenty five years ago I got sober pretty much on my own. I know I can be wicked disciplined, so I am working hard to bring that to eating and working out.

Here are some tips I use.

Avoid anything white...sugar, pasta, flour, white rice.
Skip bread.
Order extra veggies.
Drink a huge glass of water before you eat.
When you have a craving do two things -- wait 5 minutes and engage your brain in something else (pick up a book, do a simple household chore, work on a crossword).
Eat fruit instead of cookies, cake or pie. Pineapple and any kind of berries are my candy.
Get addicted to something good for you. Steamed edamame is my crack.
Most important - cheat one day a week. I usually pick Saturday because I almost always work out or do a lot of yardwork on that day.

I workout every other day. On the between days, I walk twice a day at least with my dog, at least 20-30 minutes each time.

Jake

PS .... remember that everyone is beautiful (or handsome). No matter what.

ReDo · 07-20-2011, 05:11 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Hack

PS .... remember that everyone is beautiful (or handsome). No matter what.

thank you sometimes we all need that reminder.

Medusa · 07-20-2011, 09:59 PM

Good workout tonight - Did some mild stretching and then made friends with the treadmill for 1.25 miles. YES, as in one and a quarter. 5 times around the track. WEE!

My legs are jumping but I feel pretty good. My goal this week is to walk at least a mile in every workout. I think I can do that. I have 2 workouts left this week and am on track for that so far. I will have the same goal next week in between switching up my routine for the bike.

Stuff I listen to on my iPod during workouts:

Raise Up - Petey Pablo
Bad Boys - Mace
Kerosene - Miranda Lambert
That's Not my Name - The Ting Tings
Just Fine - Mary J Blige
Tonight's Gonna be a Good Night - BEP
Big Wheel - Tori Amos
Black Betty - Wam Jam
Me So Horny - 2 Live Crew
Tipsy - J Kwon
Points of Authority/99 problemz - Jay Z
In da Wind - Trick Daddy
Zagat Naima - Jalilah
Big Pimpin - Jay Z
Freek-a-Leek - Petey Pablo
Crazy Bitch - Buck Cherry
Feedback - Janet Jackson
Strict Machine - Goldfrapp
Im in Miami Bitch - LMFAO
Closer to Fine - Indigo Girls
American Boy - Estelle
No One Knows - Queens of the New Stone Age
Big Girl - MIKA

I on an "old skool" kick right now with music as you can see but it's stuff that I know and love to sing along with so it's a super positive motivator right now.

Rockinonahigh · 07-20-2011, 11:27 PM

I weighed again today and ive droped 2 more pounds,I wanted to work on the epilitical today but an haveing probs with my left thigh spazzing up,I know its my dam sciatica geting in the way..so insted I rode the exersise bike for 41/2 miles to get into fat brning mode ad stayed there for nearly a half an hour.Then I went to the weight room for 20 solid minits of rapid works on various things...really gets the old ticker going.I really wanted to finish the last 10 minits of my normal work out but just didnt have the energy for more..somedays gonna be that way I gess.Friday when I have the time im getting something to use at the gym to groove to,head phones and all.

Sachita · 07-21-2011, 08:59 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Hack

I eat low-fat, no sugar, low carb, no salt. I drink water (trying to increase this) and Diet Coke. Skip dessert (or have just berries).

I did Weight Watchers on and off the last ten years. Found it too easy to fall off the wagon. Twenty five years ago I got sober pretty much on my own. I know I can be wicked disciplined, so I am working hard to bring that to eating and working out.

Here are some tips I use.

Avoid anything white...sugar, pasta, flour, white rice.
Skip bread.
Order extra veggies.
Drink a huge glass of water before you eat.
When you have a craving do two things -- wait 5 minutes and engage your brain in something else (pick up a book, do a simple household chore, work on a crossword).
Eat fruit instead of cookies, cake or pie. Pineapple and any kind of berries are my candy.
Get addicted to something good for you. Steamed edamame is my crack.
Most important - cheat one day a week. I usually pick Saturday because I almost always work out or do a lot of yardwork on that day.

I workout every other day. On the between days, I walk twice a day at least with my dog, at least 20-30 minutes each time.

Jake

PS .... remember that everyone is beautiful (or handsome). No matter what.

this is excellent advice and it really is that simple.

07-20-2011, 06:55 AM	#2
JustJo Infamous Member How Do You Identify?: pushy broad Preferred Pronoun?: she Relationship Status: Follow your heart; it knows things your mind cannot explain. Join Date: Jan 2010 Location: Southeast corner Posts: 5,633 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 24,417 Thanked 25,406 Times in 4,660 Posts Rep Power: 21474857	I'm with Nina....overshare sounds like a bad thing...and I think freeing up and speaking about who we are and how we feel is good, good, good. So...yes, let's talk about emotional eating. Mine goes back so far it feels like part of my DNA. Food was always the way to smooth over the gaps and the pain in my life as a kid and especially as a teenager. It was always there, right? That Ding Dong didn't insult or bully or leave me feeling unimportant or left out or, or, or.....it just sat there full of creamy filling and chocolate, all wrapped up (then) in a neat shiny little foil package, whenever I wanted it (or could get my hands on it....another story). I've always been heavy...some times heavier than others....but I was never the athletic type (even though I rode horses and swam like a fish) or slim. I weighed 130 lbs and wore a size 12 when I was 12 years old...then kept growing. At my heaviest I stopped weighing myself or buying clothes and became of a fan of the mu-mu/caftan/long, loose and swishy stuff that didn't make me beat myself up with the knowledge that I had gone past size 24. At one point in my late 20s I resolved that I was going to change, and never look like that again. I was dating a man that was into body-building. We lived on broiled fish (no butter or oil) and salad with a squeeze of lemon....not kidding....that was lunch and dinner. We went to the gym every day and worked out for 3 solid hours. I ached. I felt starved and hungry and deprived every waking moment. I was angry at the entire world and everyone in it that could eat a cheeseburger and still look "normal." I got down to a size 14, and weighed 155. People told me I looked fantastic. I loved hearing that (since I never had), but hated every other moment and myself for having to live such an austere and unpleasant (for me) existence in order to look "acceptable." Needless to say, I fell off the wagon (and broke up with the body-builder too). I gained weight....up and down a little....hovered around 200 lbs. most of the time, for years but felt like myself. Gradually it crept up, and up.... I weighed about 245 lbs. when I was diagnosed with diabetes...and it scared me to death. My aunt died the most awful death imaginable from diabetic complications. Mine was showing mostly in my eyes....diabetic retinopathy...and a firm message that, if I did not get my blood sugar under control, I would go blind. Turns out, based on the damage to my eyes, that I probably was an undiagnosed diabetic for about 20 years....back to my early 20's....maybe earlier. I went on the diabetic diet, walked an hour a day....and lost 50 lbs. That helped, but it wasn't enough to control my blood sugar. They added meds....lots of meds....but thankfully not injected insulin. As needle-phobic as I am, that would be a disaster on too many levels to even think about. I measured fats in teaspoons, weighed my food, counted my food....hated my food. I developed an intense depression....once again hating a world where "everyone else" could eat normally, or whatever they wanted, or fill in the blank and be normal and attractive and relatively healthy....and my body sabotaged me. Honestly, the only thing that kept me from being suicidal was my son. Rooster was 6, and I wanted to live long enough to see him grow up....and I wanted to see him, too. I couldn't let this thing make me blind. I also couldn't continue to live the way I was. I needed to find that happy medium...that place that Medusa describes...where I could have cake if there was an occasion for cake, or even just a strong desire for it....where food became just food...and not my enemy...where my body became my friend, and not my saboteur. That was about 8 years ago. I've regained a little of the weight I lost. I'm working on losing it again. I've also accepted the fact that I am diabetic, and that (unless there's a miracle) won't change. I need to find a way to live with it, and not let it take me out. I also have to be able to live my life...eat food...have pleasure. I have to strike a balance. __________________ I'm not tall enough to ride emotional roller coasters

07-20-2011, 08:14 AM	#3
Zimmeh Infamous Member How Do You Identify?: Femme Preferred Pronoun?: Me Relationship Status: I am a human and not a possession Join Date: Nov 2009 Location: Southern Volusia County, FL Posts: 6,746 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 23,549 Thanked 13,441 Times in 4,316 Posts Rep Power: 21474858	Growing up, I was a very active child. I was still chunky as the pictures show from that time. When I was 15, I was hit by a car coming home from school. It nearly broke both of my legs, caused my L5 and L6 vertebrae to become fused and threw my hips off a little; also watched my parents marriage fail and was taking out of my comfort zone to Michigan; a place where the other students made fun of me because of my Southern accent. As a result of the accident, I couldn't walk without a limp for a long time and I still do. I found that food was my only friend and that it wouldn't like Jo Jo said, make fun of me. Before the accident, I weighed in at 110lbs on a 5'0" frame. After the accident, I weighed anywhere from 150lbs to 210lbs<as of January 2007> on my short body. I did the whole yo yo diet and kept falling off of the wagon. My family didn't eat healthy and it was hard to watch them eat, fried chicken, red meat, and other unhealthy foods and not want to have some. I've also had to come to terms with a lot of emotional stuff that I had stored in my head. Stuff that everyday, when I look at myself in the mirror, and I say outloud, you won't control my life anymore. I have also kicked all of the negative people out of my life and replaced them with positive people... I have found that since I took control of my life in January 2007 and made the decision, that I wasn't going to pass away at the age of 47, like my dad. I have taking every measure that I can to loose the weight and if I gain back a few pounds, then I say ok, "what can I do to loose this weight?" I have learned that emotionally kicking my own ass isn't a good thing and I am trying to stop this. Once my health insurance kicks in mid August, I am going to see if a Dietician and Nutrionist is covered and I will be going to them. I have been able to keep 45lbs of the original 60lbs off. My friend says, that I have such a strong will power and that I can avoid consuming food that isn't good for me. Yes I still eat my chocolate and ice cream, but I always either end the day or start the day, with a nice long power walk and I always run up the stairs once I am finished. We can overcome what emotional shit lies underneath our over eating and we can and will show the world, that it truly is mind over matter...Maybe one day, we can help other people out; people who don't have access to Weight Watchers or other weight loss groups. I know, I am one of those people and I have found, this thread, to be the best! Thank you Jo Jo for starting this thread, Zimmy __________________ "A loving heart is the truest wisdom" -Chinua Achebe

07-20-2011, 09:07 AM	#4
ReDo Member How Do You Identify?: femme Preferred Pronoun?: her Relationship Status: I am the treat to your trick Join Date: Jul 2011 Location: Florida Posts: 129 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 265 Thanked 883 Times in 93 Posts Rep Power: 9521536	Zimmy Congratulations on keeping the weight off. I know that for me is the hardest part. I can exercise lose the weight and then put it back on. As if I never really learn how to have a healthy lifestyle instead only go through the motions to change my body for the moment. This time I want so much more than that. I am so determined and a fighter in that it takes a great deal for me to not follow through when my mind is made up. __________________ Always remember, tomorrow is another chance for a great day.

07-20-2011, 09:59 PM	#7
Medusa Mentally Delicious How Do You Identify?: Queer High Femme, thank you very much Preferred Pronoun?: Mme. Relationship Status: Married to JD. Join Date: Oct 2009 Location: Atlanta Posts: 10,446 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 5,995 Thanked 42,690 Times in 7,831 Posts Rep Power: 21474861	Good workout tonight - Did some mild stretching and then made friends with the treadmill for 1.25 miles. YES, as in one and a quarter. 5 times around the track. WEE! My legs are jumping but I feel pretty good. My goal this week is to walk at least a mile in every workout. I think I can do that. I have 2 workouts left this week and am on track for that so far. I will have the same goal next week in between switching up my routine for the bike. Stuff I listen to on my iPod during workouts: Raise Up - Petey Pablo Bad Boys - Mace Kerosene - Miranda Lambert That's Not my Name - The Ting Tings Just Fine - Mary J Blige Tonight's Gonna be a Good Night - BEP Big Wheel - Tori Amos Black Betty - Wam Jam Me So Horny - 2 Live Crew Tipsy - J Kwon Points of Authority/99 problemz - Jay Z In da Wind - Trick Daddy Zagat Naima - Jalilah Big Pimpin - Jay Z Freek-a-Leek - Petey Pablo Crazy Bitch - Buck Cherry Feedback - Janet Jackson Strict Machine - Goldfrapp Im in Miami Bitch - LMFAO Closer to Fine - Indigo Girls American Boy - Estelle No One Knows - Queens of the New Stone Age Big Girl - MIKA I on an "old skool" kick right now with music as you can see but it's stuff that I know and love to sing along with so it's a super positive motivator right now. __________________ . . . Buy ButchFemmePlanet Merch Here: https://teespring.com/stores/butchfemmeplanetcom-merch

07-19-2011, 11:29 PM	#1
Nina Timed Out How Do You Identify?: unmistakably Preferred Pronoun?: dearheart Relationship Status: In love, loved and Happy, thanks for askin' Join Date: Jan 2010 Location: SF CA Posts: 1,720 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 1,113 Thanked 3,383 Times in 931 Posts Rep Power: 0	maybe it's not 'over share'...maybe it's a freeing part of the process of integrating ourselves...the divide between who we are and our body can be huge and impacting... maybe as we learn about the disconnect...as we learn how and when we have spent years numbing our feelings with food and all else, when we can identify it, and see it with compassion, we speak of it to take it out of darkness and shame...we share it because it frees us from the emotions and reactions that keep us tied to fear and hurt... I don't know...it seems like when we define what we do as 'over sharing' there is, intrinsic in that phrase a judgement which maybe we don't need to put on ourselves... I am tired right now...I would probably not post this otherwise, but I am going to do so anyway...I admire you all for what you're doing to find a path to more balance, and a way to cherish the vessel which houses the You...I struggle with it, I think many of us do...and I am in awe at how this space is becoming a space of courage, and love and throwing off shame and wrong messages and helps us move into a space of love and of pride...

07-20-2011, 04:05 PM	#5
Hack Just a guy. How Do You Identify?: Just a guy Preferred Pronoun?: male Relationship Status: Sparkle's consort Join Date: Nov 2009 Location: MA Posts: 1,458 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 807 Thanked 3,775 Times in 958 Posts Rep Power: 21474853	I eat low-fat, no sugar, low carb, no salt. I drink water (trying to increase this) and Diet Coke. Skip dessert (or have just berries). I did Weight Watchers on and off the last ten years. Found it too easy to fall off the wagon. Twenty five years ago I got sober pretty much on my own. I know I can be wicked disciplined, so I am working hard to bring that to eating and working out. Here are some tips I use. Avoid anything white...sugar, pasta, flour, white rice. Skip bread. Order extra veggies. Drink a huge glass of water before you eat. When you have a craving do two things -- wait 5 minutes and engage your brain in something else (pick up a book, do a simple household chore, work on a crossword). Eat fruit instead of cookies, cake or pie. Pineapple and any kind of berries are my candy. Get addicted to something good for you. Steamed edamame is my crack. Most important - cheat one day a week. I usually pick Saturday because I almost always work out or do a lot of yardwork on that day. I workout every other day. On the between days, I walk twice a day at least with my dog, at least 20-30 minutes each time. Jake PS .... remember that everyone is beautiful (or handsome). No matter what.

07-20-2011, 11:27 PM	#8
Rockinonahigh Senior Member How Do You Identify?: stone butch Preferred Pronoun?: makes no diffrence,I know who I am. Relationship Status: single,maybe looking if the right person comes along. Join Date: Dec 2009 Location: shreveport,Louisiana Posts: 4,907 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 4,682 Thanked 14,933 Times in 3,938 Posts Rep Power: 21474856	I weighed again today and ive droped 2 more pounds,I wanted to work on the epilitical today but an haveing probs with my left thigh spazzing up,I know its my dam sciatica geting in the way..so insted I rode the exersise bike for 41/2 miles to get into fat brning mode ad stayed there for nearly a half an hour.Then I went to the weight room for 20 solid minits of rapid works on various things...really gets the old ticker going.I really wanted to finish the last 10 minits of my normal work out but just didnt have the energy for more..somedays gonna be that way I gess.Friday when I have the time im getting something to use at the gym to groove to,head phones and all.