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Old 08-15-2011, 06:39 PM   #1
Dean Thoreau
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glad u got bennies momma random and can be out.....at work

I am sort of out at work...well one look at me and u know..but working in a school system, a nice conservative republican one is not conducive to carrying the rainbow flag down the hallway.....
....so my coworkers, principal and the administrators etc all know.I do not hide it,,,,if asked what i did over the weekend I will say Wife and i went to.....or whatever.
.. i do not tell the parents of the kids, or the kids.....that is not what i was hired to teach the kids....sexuality comes under health...
and i am not the health teacher...would not want the union to get cranky....

everyone is pretty cool,,,even when i do run into a student and their parent at home depot when i am wearing my work boots, and cut off tshirt and shorts that is revealing all my tattos and the rainbow ball cap on my head,,,and the rainbow stickers on the truck..they dont seem to mind. (Of course the only difference between that outfit and what i wear at work is the shorts have hems and the shirts have sleeves.....and my sneakers match my clothes Once the students and parents get to know Dr Thoreau,,,and the parents see how much their kids love being in the docs class....there is no problem...those that have given me the stare at Back to School night in the beginning of the year usually by halloween parade are hanging out with me laughing at my crazy jokes.....since usually their kid is giving me a high five a hug or a ...secret password to enter my classroom signal...

.............. yes i have a mohawk now old fat grey haired butch with mohawk


and yes I love this wonderful career and will really miss it..when i retire.....next june (they are really cutting our school budget to shreds)
t
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Old 08-15-2011, 07:06 PM   #2
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I've been out in the workplace since I had a workplace. I can't be with people every day and not have them know me. And if you don't know I'm gay, then you don't know me.
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Old 08-15-2011, 07:17 PM   #3
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I'm out at work. Way out.

I have been out at every job I've had since I was 17.

I work in a large company. We have 1500-2000 people on our particular campus and I am one of maybe 15 out GLBT folks. Many of the GLBT folks who are not out (but known to me from years in clubs or with volunteer orgs) are people who are very "old school" about their privacy or who are in upper management VP positions (perhaps fearful of their promotion opportunities even though our company has a good diversity policy)

I have brought Jackhammer to work with me and she has met my boss and several of my coworkers. I have photos of her on my desk and openly talk about our activities together. I probably would not work for a company where I had to hide myself or relationship.
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Old 08-15-2011, 07:23 PM   #4
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Also, since I seem to fall into dating co-workers....
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Old 08-17-2011, 09:04 AM   #5
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I am out at work, ever since I started this new job, its been great. I've always been out about being gay, however at my new job they are aware of my transition and are fully supportive of it, even if they don't always know how to handle every situation, they don't hesitate to ask me.

I am very fortunate, especially since we are a smaller company of about 30-40 people across all three of our offices. It helps also I am sure that I am not the only queer person here.
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Old 09-22-2016, 08:32 AM   #6
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I'm out at work. Way out.

I have been out at every job I've had since I was 17.

I work in a large company. We have 1500-2000 people on our particular campus and I am one of maybe 15 out LGBT folks. Many of the LGBT folks who are not out (but known to me from years in clubs or with volunteer orgs) are people who are very "old school" about their privacy or who are in upper management VP positions (perhaps fearful of their promotion opportunities even though our company has a good diversity policy)


I posted this back in 2011 and am still with the same company.

My experience here remains pretty much the same with the exception that several of the other folks who were out have left the company, either in retirement or through layoffs.

I am the only senior manager that I know of on this entire campus who is out. I've been lucky enough not to experience much in the way of homophobia or judgment but do hear ignorant comments regularly. This happens in the real world every day so I just view it as a product of living in the world with ignorant people in general.

I've had a good experience over all with this company and still have photos all over my office of me being very gay. I even have a Medusa head (replete with moving snakes!) draped in a huge gay pride necklace and have a sign on the outside of my door that says "FABULOUSNESS is spoken here" (done in rainbow lettering).

I know this is a privilege and I respect that.
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Old 09-22-2016, 09:54 AM   #7
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yes it's too obvious.

My experience has been fine. I'm treated like the other guys. (Flirty women and the infamous guy nods and the "what up's")

I've not had any problems anywhere I've worked. I consider myself lucky since I know many have.
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Old 09-22-2016, 02:17 PM   #8
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I'm out to God and everybody. I think for myself to do anything else would be to lie by omission. I understand people's reasons for choosing to remain closeted but I'm just simply not going to let any of that stuff rule me. I'd rather live only one day entirely free to be my true authentic self, than live a long life, in perfect health, surrounded by opulence and splendor in exchange for my silence - willingness to spend those years living closeted. Even if while closeted I could have the most attractive and sexually compatible woman on the planet to be my loyal, devoted, faithful friend and lover along with bags and bags and vaults full of money the answer is still no. Esse quam videri, this because to my way of thinking - It ain't worth a thing if it ain't got that zing.
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Old 09-22-2016, 03:07 PM   #9
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I'm out to God and everybody. I think for myself to do anything else would be to lie by omission. I understand people's reasons for choosing to remain closeted but I'm just simply not going to let any of that stuff rule me. I'd rather live only one day entirely free to be my true authentic self, than live a long life, in perfect health, surrounded by opulence and splendor in exchange for my silence - willingness to spend those years living closeted. Even if while closeted I could have the most attractive and sexually compatible woman on the planet to be my loyal, devoted, faithful friend and lover along with bags and bags and vaults full of money the answer is still no. Esse quam videri, this because to my way of thinking - It ain't worth a thing if it ain't got that zing.
I just need to point this out:

Sometimes, for some people, it is not to live in "opulence and splendor" to remain closeted; it is simply to survive.

You and I are very fortunate to be able to make that choice.

Not everyone gets to do that.
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Old 09-22-2016, 03:21 PM   #10
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yes it's too obvious.

My experience has been fine. I'm treated like the other guys. (Flirty women and the infamous guy nods and the "what up's")

I've not had any problems anywhere I've worked. I consider myself lucky since I know many have.
I'm lucky too, T1. And, things weren't like this 20 years ago where I work. No one was out, though there were whispers and probably campaigns to prevent lesbians and gay people from advancing.

The first person who came out where I'm employed was a manager in the technology department. He came out during a black-tie event. Employees were allowed to bring guests and he brought his partner. They did a slow dance that was very nice. Thank goodness no one applauded.

Yeah, I'm lucky too.
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Old 09-22-2016, 03:40 PM   #11
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Once I came out and divorced my daughter's father, I never went back into the closet.

Anya has a point....

My last place of employment (before I became disabled), was a 10 year run at a company where it was not completely safe to be out and loud about it. It was an engineering firm/manufacturing plant where a large portion of the workforce were very macho men, of many races and nationalities.

My employer and all of the office people knew, but my employer actually told me that it would probably not be safe for myself or my car to have rainbow stickers and such. When I began in 2003 it was good advice, and by 2013 when I left it was still something I kept in mind. I had let a few people know when they saw a picture on my desk, and I was made aware that I was an oddity to be gossiped about.

In any case, I probably should have shoved it in their faces...but being queer is only a part of me, not who I am. It was my place of employment, NOT my home.
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Old 09-22-2016, 05:24 PM   #12
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I'm lucky too, T1. And, things weren't like this 20 years ago where I work. No one was out, though there were whispers and probably campaigns to prevent lesbians and gay people from advancing.

The first person who came out where I'm employed was a manager in the technology department. He came out during a black-tie event. Employees were allowed to bring guests and he brought his partner. They did a slow dance that was very nice. Thank goodness no one applauded.

Yeah, I'm lucky too.
That took guts for him to do that. There are many brave and strong souls in our community and it's because of those people things are how they are today.

many places of employment are accepting now. And I'm thankful to be in the now and not as you said..... 20 years ago. (And beyond)


Yes we are very lucky indeed.
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Old 09-22-2016, 07:05 PM   #13
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I recently added in some work hours at an inner city after school teen drop in center. There are rainbows and gender neutral/trans acceptance stickers and posters everywhere. So I have a rainbow GBLTQ safe zone poster on my office door and a rainbow flag on my desk but so does everyone else there so it doesn't out me. I love it. Not that it doesn't out me, but all of the staff are waving the flag for any of the kids who need it.But it's funny that my "signal" isn't a signal there!
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Old 09-25-2016, 08:11 AM   #14
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As many of you know, I'm a public high school teacher in a small town in Western Mass. Pete worked for a locally owned lumber yard for about five years, though she's back in school now. She's knows almost every contractor and handy fixit homeowner around.

I guess I'm outish. We attend school events together, and she occasionally goes grocery shopping with me, which is very exciting to my students, when they catch us fighting over canned tomatoes or frozen vegetables.

I mostly look like a chubby middle aged math teacher, though I have a tattoo climbing up my left leg and purple highlights in my hair. I wear a traditional wedding band and an engagement ring. I suspect many are stymied.
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Old 08-15-2011, 07:23 PM   #15
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I am out in all areas of my life. It takes too much work to censor myself.
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