Much Maligned Christmas Accoutrements

[Cin]

Another thing about Christmas is Christmas music. Which I love. And I can't wait to start listening to it. So I have to take some of the blame for what happens. I start hearing it in malls right after Thanksgiving and then as soon as December rolls around I find myself listening to stuff online. By the time it's a week before Christmas I've had it with Christmas music.

[ButchEire]

*Looks at watch*
Hmm, that looks to be just about...

NOW!

*runs*

Originally Posted by Miss Tick

By the time it's a week before Christmas I've had it with Christmas music.

[Dean Thoreau]

claxton fruitcake dark is the best.
sugar plum wine is great to wash down the fruitcake with
gingerbread houses dont get delcious till the week before easter....u need at least an inch of dust on them
my gran daughter just handed me two cookies she made..with so much frosting and red and green sprinkles that the sugar high should last till july.
real peppermint candy canes are the only kind to have.....and they have no expiration date....so u can eat them and the leftovers use year after year....
I love xmast crap food......and the best fruitcake i ever had was when some of my old parishoners gave me some they had soaked in brandy.......for a year or so i think....I dont remember much from that xmas eve till about umm good friday
Ok I need to go now,,,sugar plum wine...heritage winery new jersey......only way to eat sugarplums

[Cin]

Tinsel is somewhat problematic. It’s not so much that I don’t like it. It’s more that not everyone can be trusted to use it properly. I think you need to be tad OCD in order to decorate a tree with tinsel. Often people just clump the shit on. That’s not acceptable. My mother always put the tinsel on one strand at a time. I don’t have the perseverance to do it exactly like that, at least not a whole package, but I do it as singularly as I can. To me that’s the only way it looks good. I’ve never been with anyone who had the patience to do this. People seem to think if you put a clump on the end of a branch it’s adequate. Clumping tinsel is an incompetent way to decorate a tree. It just doesn’t look good. No matter that it’s a pain in the ass you have to take it a couple of strands at a time. Either one should use tinsel correctly or one should just eliminate it from the repertoire.

And if you have pets you might want to just forget tinsel altogether. It’s bad enough that one ends up finding this stuff clinging to furniture and out of the way places way past July, but if your pet eats it you will pulling it out of their ass for months. Nothing more delightful than a strand of tinsel sticking out your Fluffy’s A-hole.

[1QuirkyKiwi]

Originally Posted by Miss Tick

And if you have pets you might want to just forget tinsel altogether. It’s bad enough that one ends up finding this stuff clinging to furniture and out of the way places way past July, but if your pet eats it you will pulling it out of their ass for months. Nothing more delightful than a strand of tinsel sticking out your Fluffy’s A-hole.

I laughed so hard I've just spewed my tea down my nose and across the room, AGAIN! ....With 5 furbabies, tinsel is up high on the walls and the tree is demolished within minutes of it going up! LOL!

[ButchEire]

I always begin with the appropriate tinseling intensions, placing one or two carefully chosen and gently pulled strands for each branch. After ten or fifteen of these however I want to cut out my eyeballs with an ornament hook. At that point, I become reckless and grab fistfuls of the no longer shiny, but agonizingly gleaming strands, casting them in the general direction of said tree. Many make it to the tree, in random clumps that I invite guests to identify as their favorite manger animal. The strands that don't make it to the tree are deemed not worthy of a holiday and are relegated to the vacuum bag in shame.

Originally Posted by Miss Tick

Tinsel is somewhat problematic. It’s not so much that I don’t like it. It’s more that not everyone can be trusted to use it properly. I think you need to be tad OCD in order to decorate a tree with tinsel. Often people just clump the shit on. That’s not acceptable. My mother always put the tinsel on one strand at a time. I don’t have the perseverance to do it exactly like that, at least not a whole package, but I do it as singularly as I can. To me that’s the only way it looks good. I’ve never been with anyone who had the patience to do this. People seem to think if you put a clump on the end of a branch it’s adequate. Clumping tinsel is an incompetent way to decorate a tree. It just doesn’t look good. No matter that it’s a pain in the ass you have to take it a couple of strands at a time. Either one should use tinsel correctly or one should just eliminate it from the repertoire.

And if you have pets you might want to just forget tinsel altogether. It’s bad enough that one ends up finding this stuff clinging to furniture and out of the way places way past July, but if your pet eats it you will pulling it out of their ass for months. Nothing more delightful than a strand of tinsel sticking out your Fluffy’s A-hole.

[Cin]

Originally Posted by ButchEire

I always begin with the appropriate tinseling intensions, placing one or two carefully chosen and gently pulled strands for each branch. After ten or fifteen of these however I want to cut out my eyeballs with an ornament hook. At that point, I become reckless and grab fistfuls of the no longer shiny, but agonizingly gleaming strands, casting them in the general direction of said tree. Many make it to the tree, in random clumps that I invite guests to identify as their favorite manger animal. The strands that don't make it to the tree are deemed not worthy of a holiday and are relegated to the vacuum bag in shame.

You are a riot!