Under 30 - Coming Up and Coming Out

Red-Dragon · 12-20-2011, 12:32 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by AlphaDrug

Naaaah... I'm a big dork. I like my forums and blogs and such. I'll be around for a while. But I feel like we need more threads... not sure what kind of threads though. lol

i read through on these things i just dont post. and yeah gotta agree more threads like these. plus alpha the "babies" as u said are around lol (i just go off and on this site cause of work) <<is not stealthy just knows how to do the hudini trick and disappear

AlexHunter · 01-19-2012, 03:33 PM

For me, the realization of being gay was a part of something bigger: gender dysphoria.

I always felt, well, male. When I was two, I asked my mom when I was going to grow a penis. Throughout my childhood, I had my hair as short as my mother would let me have it, dressed like a boy, played with the boys, and liked girls. It wasn't anything complicated back then; "boy" things felt "right" and "girl" things didn't.

My parents had a collection of old movies. I loved watching them and strongly identified with the leading male characters. I wanted to be a gentleman with a pretty lady on my arm.

I had my first memorable girl crush in first grade. We went trick or treating together. I was a big, scary vampire and she wanted to dress as a princess. I told her Halloween was supposed to be scary, so the princess idea was lame. She compromised and decided to be a zombie princess, instead.

I lost my virginity (to a girl) at thirteen. I had sex with several girls throughout high school, though my first serious girlfriend was not until senior year. I also enjoyed looking up porn with guys in it (had to be man and woman, though, I didn't care for the gay stuff), which briefly made me wonder if I was attracted to them, in addition to girls. I decided to explore something sexual with a guy and quickly realized I was disgusted by it. I just had a bad case of penis envy.

I never had to "come out." Everyone assumed. I was dead set on transitioning until I was 20 (I'm 28 now). I toyed around with several labels before I found out what was comfortable for me. I didn't want to claim butch status at first because I thought it was a term for "lesbians." The butch-identified people I knew were (in hindsight) either woman ID'd or soft butch (nothing wrong with either, but it's not me.) I read about "stone butch" and went by that for awhile. I am not 100% stone anymore but that is another story. For the last few years, I've claimed butch and genderqueer.

1ladyface · 01-27-2012, 01:22 AM

Hi All,

My ex and good friend is blogging for

originalplumbing.com

from jail, via letters to me. His first post went up today. I think of the OP community as really supportive but there have been two nasty comments on his blog post, both of which are based on inaccurate and unfounded assumptions.

He is blogging to share his experiences, connect with other trans folks struggling with substance abuse and create a space to open up a dialogue around that. He's really put it all out there in his first post and I'm just flabbergasted and horrified that anyone would be outright mean in their comments.

Anyway, I think the post is worth reading and if you have a chance, give him some love. What he needs now is encouragement and community not holier than though self righteous judgemental bullshit.

love love love (and no bullshit),

ladyface

01-19-2012, 03:33 PM	#2
AlexHunter Member How Do You Identify?: With a greeting and a handshake, typically Preferred Pronoun?: He Relationship Status: Single Join Date: Dec 2011 Location: Houston, TX Posts: 150 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 469 Thanked 455 Times in 49 Posts Rep Power: 6000594	Well, this will be long. For me, the realization of being gay was a part of something bigger: gender dysphoria. I always felt, well, male. When I was two, I asked my mom when I was going to grow a penis. Throughout my childhood, I had my hair as short as my mother would let me have it, dressed like a boy, played with the boys, and liked girls. It wasn't anything complicated back then; "boy" things felt "right" and "girl" things didn't. My parents had a collection of old movies. I loved watching them and strongly identified with the leading male characters. I wanted to be a gentleman with a pretty lady on my arm. I had my first memorable girl crush in first grade. We went trick or treating together. I was a big, scary vampire and she wanted to dress as a princess. I told her Halloween was supposed to be scary, so the princess idea was lame. She compromised and decided to be a zombie princess, instead. I lost my virginity (to a girl) at thirteen. I had sex with several girls throughout high school, though my first serious girlfriend was not until senior year. I also enjoyed looking up porn with guys in it (had to be man and woman, though, I didn't care for the gay stuff), which briefly made me wonder if I was attracted to them, in addition to girls. I decided to explore something sexual with a guy and quickly realized I was disgusted by it. I just had a bad case of penis envy. I never had to "come out." Everyone assumed. I was dead set on transitioning until I was 20 (I'm 28 now). I toyed around with several labels before I found out what was comfortable for me. I didn't want to claim butch status at first because I thought it was a term for "lesbians." The butch-identified people I knew were (in hindsight) either woman ID'd or soft butch (nothing wrong with either, but it's not me.) I read about "stone butch" and went by that for awhile. I am not 100% stone anymore but that is another story. For the last few years, I've claimed butch and genderqueer. __________________ Speak your mind even if your voice shakes. "We are all in the gutter, but some of us are looking at the stars." -Oscar Wilde

01-27-2012, 01:22 AM	#3
1ladyface Junior Member How Do You Identify?: femme Preferred Pronoun?: she Relationship Status: loved and loving Join Date: Dec 2011 Location: SF Posts: 86 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 65 Thanked 279 Times in 66 Posts Rep Power: 3368880	Hi All, My ex and good friend is blogging for originalplumbing.com from jail, via letters to me. His first post went up today. I think of the OP community as really supportive but there have been two nasty comments on his blog post, both of which are based on inaccurate and unfounded assumptions. He is blogging to share his experiences, connect with other trans folks struggling with substance abuse and create a space to open up a dialogue around that. He's really put it all out there in his first post and I'm just flabbergasted and horrified that anyone would be outright mean in their comments. Anyway, I think the post is worth reading and if you have a chance, give him some love. What he needs now is encouragement and community not holier than though self righteous judgemental bullshit. love love love (and no bullshit), ladyface __________________ xoxo -ladyface http://www.1ladyface.blogspot.com