Is the customer really always right? What they said/what you wish could say...

[Peach]

customer--this soup is bad
me----whats wrong with it?
customer--its bad
me----is it cold?
customer--no, its bad, I dont like it. I have never liked mushroom soup
me----you dont LIKE mushroom soup, why did you order it?
customer--I wanted to see if I still didnt like it. I dont, I want my money back, and a different kind of soup
me----I'm sorry, if the only reason is you dont LIKE the soup, and never liked it, I cannot refund your money. there is nothing wrong with the soup. I am happy to give you a different kind, but I will have to charge you for it.
customer--thats stupid, you are stupid, your soup is stupid.
me----I'm sorry you feel that way.
me--(in my head) you stupid sonofabitch, if you never liked mushroom soup, dont order it, I'm not giving you free soup, buecause YOU are stupid!

on a daily basis, this happens in one way or another. Tim Hortons, gotta love it.

[weatherboi]

I had to learn how to navigate my way around clients that think their warranty covers self inflicted damage. I think it is ok to tell a customer they are in the wrOng. I think it is important to find a way to do it so not to receive complaints about how it is handled. The goal is to make everybody think they won something.

[homoe]

He should of went with the donuts! lol

[Hollylane]

Starting a new service application today:

Me: Is English okay for your Rights and Responsibilities Letter?
Customer: Oh yeah, because I'm white.
Me: :silent because I am trying not to vomit in my mouth:

[twist of lime]

Sometimes, there is no getting around it, no matter what you say, no matter what you do, no matter how you cradle them in your arms and flip their lips back an forth with your finger, sometimes they're just an asshole.

[skeeter_01]

i work in a huge level 1 trauma center/ER (university of michigan)....the customers we work with are the pt who is sick and scared and not always very nice...unfortunately..the nurses (have i mentioned that we have the BEST nurses in the country????)...are the ones who catch most of the shit...uhhh...sometimes literally!!..we've had our nurses and techs get physically assulted by pts and visitors alike...

the other customers we deal with are the family memebers...talk about people being scared! imagine your loved one lying on a trauma bay cart...SO many things that can happen or go wrong to the human body...OMG!! you have NO idea!!...

alot of the family members are polite and very nice...but there are some who. become very nasty and abusive...usually due to fear and grief or frustration because the medical staff isn't moving fast enough to suit them...

it's a tough job but i LOVE it!! i love the staff...the nurses, the docs and us clerks...we're one big family and we do our job well!!

[Hollylane]

Unbelievable

Hollylane: I would be happy to help you with a payment arrangement Debbie. When are you able to make an initial payment?

Debbie: I don't need a fucking arrangement. I am going to pay $100 once a month, like I have been doing for the past 3 months.

Hollylane: I wish I could say that $100 would be enough to stop the pending disconnection, but unfortunately, your usage has increased to $180 per month on average. Portions of your past due balance are now more than 90 days old, and $100 is not enough to reduce your balance, because your usage is higher than $100 per month. At this time, I'd be happy to help you with an arrangement to stop the pending disconnection, but we're going to need to catch the balance up by the next notice due date, because you're already on an 11 month payment plan.

Debbie: I'm paying $100, I don't give a fuck about how past due I am.

Hollylane: Debbie, I'd really like to help you with a payment arrangement today that will keep your service active. I can use the first payment of $100 to extend the due date with an additional payment of $500 by 08/14/12.

Debbie (yelling to husband in the background): Rich! Hurry up! The line for Space Mountain is moving!! Hurry! Hurry!

Hollylane: Debbie?

Debbie: I'm only paying $100 every month, and you better make those fucking automated machines stop calling my Iphone, you're wearing down my battery and I'm not answering them or listening to the messages you people are leaving. I'm on vacation!

Hollylane: Debbie, I'm unable to stop the calls, but you can stop them yourself by answering and interacting with the automated menu. I just want to make sure you are aware, that I can't guarantee that your electric service will remain on beyond the 16th without a payment larger than $100, unless we have arrangements for a second payment. Can I help you with arrangements for a second payment?

Debbie: Let me talk to your fucking manager, bitch. I already told you I'm not paying more than $100 a month.

Hollylane: I'd be happy to let you speak with my supervisor or lead Debbie. I'm sure they will be glad to help you with an arrangement for a second payment. Can I have you hold for just a moment while I locate one for you?

Debbie: Sure, put me on hold, I'm not paying more than $100. (calling out to Rich) "Fuck, I told you we had to hurry. Do you want to keep waiting in line or go get burgers?"

Hollylane: Debbie, thank you for holding. I have my supervisor Ben on the line, he'll assist you from here.

Ben: Thank you Hollylane. How can I help you today Debbie?

Debbie: I told that bitch more than once I am only paying $100 this month! That is what I pay every month.

Ben: Debbie, as of today, you're account is $400 past due, and portions of that are over 90 days in arrears. We're going to need the full $400 to avoid an interruption of service, no later than 07/16/12, with arrangements for the remaining $200 to be paid no later than 08/14/12.

Debbie: Can I talk to that girl again? She said I could pay $100 now to cancel you turning off my lights, and $500 on 08/14/12.

Ben: I'm her supervisor Debbie, you requested to speak with me. Based on your account status and payment history, we will need $400 to cancel the pending interruption, and an arrangement to pay the balance of $200 on 08/14/12.

Debbie: Fuck. You people are such bastards. (yelling) Rich! Give me the credit card. (mumbling) I guess we're not going to Universal Studios...

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~


I seriously am left speechless sometimes...Disneyland before your electric bill? She wasn't even hiding it...

[Hollylane]

I'm not sure who got the "customer of the day" award yesterday...

This guy:

Hollylane: Thank you for verifying your information Bob. How can I help you?

Bob: You can help me by removing my name from this account with my bitch whore of a soon to be ex-wife!

Hollylane: (after long pause, while holding breath, and in an overly cheerful and high pitched voice. Also, I may have bounced on the balls of my feet with my extra enthusiasm) I can help you with that Bob!

or this gal:

Hollylane: Thank you for calling ___, may I please have the address or the account number that I can help you with?

Becky: OMG! I can't believe you people are charging me this much money for my light bill! OMG!!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

What I would have like to have said to Becky....

OMG! I can't believe you use chat lingo when you are actually talking to a person about your "light bill"!! OMG!!

and...

OMG!! If this were actually a bill for just your "lights", we wouldn't be having this conversation. Unless, it is time to reconsider whether the growing lights you are using are energy efficient? If we have to call it something other than the "electric bill", can we be a bit more realistic, and call it your "large appliance bill"? I'm just sayin'.....

[Hollylane]

Getting my gripe on, and blowing off a little steam...

Okay, I just want to put these things out here in the light of day...I have conversations like these on a daily basis, and I am flummoxed about how, or why they could actually take place multiple times in a day...

Hollylane: Thank you for calling ___, may I please have the address or the account number that I can help you with?

Customer: I don't know my address...It is at the _____Apartment complex on ____ street. I just need to give the manager an account number, can't you look it up by the cross street?

Or....

Hollylane: Thank you for calling ___, may I please have the address or the account number that I can help you with?

Customer: My name is Britteny, and I'm really pissed off at you people for charging me so much every month. I am never home. I never use any electricity. Never. My bill last month was $39, there is no way I used that much electricity. I live by myself. Can you see my payment of $26 from last month? How much did I average in 2010, I kicked my ex out back then, and my bill should be lower. I'm really pissed off. I can't pay you that much money every month. I need a payment arrangement.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Apparently, I am expected to have a directory in my head with every address in the Portland and Salem areas emblazoned upon my brain. WTF?

And I ask you, if you are calling customer service for assistance with your account, or to start electric service, or to report an outage, why wouldn't you be prepared with at least your address? It is not rocket science.

The Britteny customer, oh my days...Diving down the rabbit hole, drilling me with questions, complaining about a miniscule dollar amount, and I'm supposed to help you how? How can I help you when all I have is your name?

Let's go back to the beginning and start with that address or account number. Sheesh.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Power off for non-payment scenarios..

Hollylane: Thank you for calling ___, may I please have the address or the account number that I can help you with?

Customer: It's too dark in here for me to see my account number, you need to turn my fucking lights back on right now! I made a payment 2 months ago, I can't believe you people turned the lights off! I have babies, I have an elderly mother on oxygen, I have a fish tank, a reptile cage (etc, etc)...

and....

Hollylane: Thank you for calling ___, may I please have the address or the account number that I can help you with?

Customer: I paid you your fucking money, your reconnection fees, and your deposit 15 minutes ago. Why are my lights not back on? I want them on right now. How long am I going to have to wait?

Hollylane: I'm sorry that happened today, we'll restore your power as quickly and safely as possible, but unfortunately, I'm unable to provide a time frame for your reconnection. We do work all of our orders before we leave for the day, so it will be sometime today.

Customer: You just turned them off 45 minutes ago, so just turn them back on NOW. I paid my bill. Turn them on NOW.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Comments on reconnection for non-payment scenarios...

Is it really necessary to have your lights on to provide me with your address? Why can't people hear me when I say "or"??

How come everyone suddenly has $300(average reconnection amount with 1/2 of a balance + 30 r/c and 1/3 of a deposit) within an hour if their power is interrupted? We inundate our customers with mailed notices and phone calls, work with them extensively to help them keep their electricity on (it is expensive for both our company and the customer to turn them off and back on), and all we ask for is a phone call to make a payment arrangement, and for them to make a payment at least every other month. The customers above do not call until their power is off.

Perhaps we should let them wait to have the power back on for as long as we had to wait for a payment, or even a bloody phone call...

There are legitimate customers who are truly struggling in today's economy, and they call us every month, talk with us about where they are at, how much they can pay, and are polite even while they are stressed about where the next loaf of bread is coming from. They rarely experience an interruption of service, because they call, and they follow through with their commitments.

As far as assigning guilt to your electric service customer service representative, about your mother, your brother, your fish, and your babies...

If this is such a concern for you, why did you wait to call me until the power was off? If it were my mother, and I was struggling, I would have been calling every day, I would do everything in my power to not have anything happen that could threaten the health or well being of anyone I love. I don't feel sorry for the person calling, I feel empathy for the people/animals that have to rely on someone so irresponsible, and with so little concern for their welfare.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Power off due to weather or equipment failure scenarios...

Hollylane: Thank you for calling ___, may I please have the address that you are reporting a power outage for?

Customer A: My mother is on oxygen, you need to turn my power back on right now. If she dies, I'm suing you people!

Customer B: The 80 mile hour wind knocked the power out, and I heard a big boom. The power has been out for 2 hours now, are you people going to credit my account?

Customer C: It is snowing hard, and my power has been out for 12 hours, and I just saw your guys sitting in their trucks eating and talking around noon, why the fuck aren't they working to get my power back on?

Customer D: It is 40 degrees outside, I'm going to freeze to death, and my babies are going to die if you don't get the power back on right now!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Comments on power off due to weather or equipment failure scenarios...

Customer A...I'm 99.99999% certain that if your mother is actually on an oxygen machine (or even in the same state for that matter), that the medical supply company has provided you with back up gigantic and travel size oxygen tanks...

Customer B...If your meter is not running, you don't have power, and we charge by kilowatt hour used, what exactly am I crediting your account for?

Customer C...My guys and gals have been working on restoring your power in freezing weather, through the night, sometimes not even able to spend holidays with their families, risking life and limb to repair electric lines and poles...I'm pretty fucking sure I don't feel bad about them stopping to have a sandwich in their trucks with the heat on. You should be ashamed of yourself, and appreciate that you have shelter.

Customer D...When your power has been restored, a quick search of the internet may lead you to this . Prior to that, humans lived for millions of years without electricity. It was a little uncomfortable, yes, but they lived, and they didn't have a Walmart to go buy a blanket at. In more recent human history, they even survived in the deserts of Arizona at temperatures over 117 degrees, and survived in temperatures well below zero...all without electricity...40 degrees? Put on an extra sweater and an extra pair of socks, you'll live...I'm just sayin'....

And one last thing....

No one at the electric company can turn your power back on first because of your particular situation. If the power is off for one home in your area, it is off for all. You are not special, you have to wait while our guys and gals work their asses off, regardless of current weather situations, to restore your power, just like everyone else. You are not more important, and you are not the only person in the world.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

End transmission. :CLICK:

[ruffryder]

At work last night..

One guy concerned with paying $20 for valet parking and mentioned that he shouldn't have to because he is spending $4,000 at the restaurant tomorrow night.

Me and co-worker after he left gruntled and finally forked over a $20. . "Sheesh, $20 for valet shouldn't be nothing compared to the dinner."

Another lady.. OMG $20 for valet?! Are you serious?! I have a room here and I have to pay for valet? To which I replied, "yes, ma'am. I can bill it to your room if you like. It's only complimentary if you are in a club level room." Her: "OMG. I don't want it billed to my room." Me: "Ok, then it's $20." Her: "I don't want to pay." LOL Finally she pays. Then she changes her mind and says, "Just bill it to the room." All the while she is trying to talk on the phone to someone while trying to figure out her bill. I finally have had it and in a nice stern voice say, "Ma'am, I can do whatever you like just let me know." *laughing*

[ruffryder]

at work overnight.. after I found a woman drunk stumbling.

Me: "Ma'am, can I be of assistance. Help you find where you are going."

Her: "You aren't gonna arrest me, are you?"

Me. "No ma'am. I'm going to assist you and help you get to where you are going. Do you have an ID on you?"

Her: "Where's my pants?"

Me:

Her later walking as I escort her: "I can't believe I'm walking without my pants. I so hate you."

Me:

After she gets to where she needs to be she says, "Can I get a hug?" As I walk away fast, I wave and say, "Bye ma'am. Have a good night. Enjoy your stay!"

[femm_cb]

I deal with a lot of attorneys, with all due respect, I wonder how a few even managed to pass the bar?

[psykftm]

I work at a gas station at the moment...
I really just can't stand the sweetie, honey stuff. I never understand how (typically male) customers come in, and despite how butch I look still find it so easy to drop something like a babydoll. Pisses me off its just damn, really?

One time this dude walks in and drops ten of them in one sentence. No one was in the store, so I decided to vent this time. I told him I didn't like to be called those types of things..he argued and said I shouldn't care because all his female co-workers see it as him being affectionate. Wtf. So when I said I didn't want his affection, he was all "well I was going to get gas but you can forget it". He didn't freakin leave though! He just kept talking about what it meant to him..he couldn't hear a damn thing I said about how it affected me. Eventually I told him to get out of my store. A year eroded me though, and now I only tend to fight on it with my regulars. One of them even started calling me sir when I explained, so that was a bit healing for me..that guy is cool as hell.

I just can't believe people sometimes...my truck driver would call me "mama" and "baby"...and so I explain that I have contemplated ftm, and that I really dislike those types of titles. I thought he totally understood. He's all "some people can be so disrespectful with that" and basically went on about how he didn't think there was anything wrong with ftm, alla that...then when he leaves he goes, "alright, see you next time princess". Not as a stab...he was seriously just that freakin stupid. I really just wish people didn't through those terms around without a second thought.

That's my rant, I hope I didn't offend anyone who appreciates those terms, and also didn't mean to imply that all butches hate those phrases.

[Hollylane]

And the customer of the week award goes to Christina...

5:06 pm 05/16/2013: After the standard greeting, and the address for the service is pried out of Christina, while she dove down more rabbit holes than I could have ever imagined....

Hollylane: Christina, I don't see that you have been authorized on Vance's account, so, unfortunately, I can't discuss the account information with you. However, I will tell you that we have sent for the reconnection at the pole, for electric service at this address.

Christina: We paid you good money a 1/2 an hour ago, why is my F*@##$@ing electricity still off????!!!??? I don't know why they did it at the pole anyway. The a**hole who turned it off told me there would not be any reconnection fees, you better not have charged a fee!!! I want my power on NOW!!! Did you charge me a fee???

Hollylane (after reviewing the notes, seeing the standard pole cut-in fee of $75, and noting that no payments had been received in the past 6 months): Christina, is the account holder available? I'd be happy to talk with you about any charges to the their account, if I can verify that I'm able to discuss Vance's account with you.

As to the reason for cutting the service out at the pole, according to the notes for this address, our service person was unable to access the meter, because you were blocking it with your body. Because this is a restoration at the pole, it requires a bucket truck to restore your power. The bucket truck crews are also working to resolve outages, and it could be up to 24 hours before the electricity at this address is restored. Had we cut out at the meter, it would have only been a few hours, at the most. Without discussing the account information, I can advise you that reconnection fees for service disconnected at the pole, are the same for all customers, and the amount would be $75. Had this been done at the meter, the fee would have only been $30.

Christina: WHAT??!!!??? He's a f**ing LIAR!!!! I didn't block nothing!!!!!! I want the power on by MIDNIGHT, with NO FEES, or I am filing a complaint!!!!

Hollylane: I'd be happy to provide you with the Public Utility Commission's telephone number, but I'm afraid they would need to speak with the customer of record.

Christina: I want to talk to your Supervisor right now you moron!

Hollylane: Christina, I can get someone on the line for you, but unfortunately, they would not be able to help you anymore than I can. You are not on the account, and we cannot provide you a time frame for reconnection, other than the 24 hour window, that the account holder was advised of at 3:15 pm today.

(I continued to explain the situation to Christina for another 10 minutes, while she continued to curse me out)

Hollylane: I'm afraid this conversation has become non-productive Christina, I am unable to assist you with your demands, and I am unwilling to continue with this call while you verbally abuse me. Please have Vance give us a call, if he has any further questions.

Christina: #@)(*%_)@#$($#_$_$@(*!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

*CLICK*

3:00 pm 05/17/2013 (23.75 hours later): Service was restored. Notes on the account showed that she had continued verbally abusing our 24 hour outage reps throughout the night. I can't help but wonder if the bucket truck crew, saved this cut-in until only a few minutes remained in the 24 hour window, because of her behavior. If they did, I want to buy them a round.

[homoe]

BUMP BUMP BUMP


Having worked in retail for over 30 years, I can so relate to these stories!

[Smiling]

Believe me, the customer is seldom right.
lol, I miss working with the public, though. There was a bond with my coworkers - it was just us against the entire public, lol. You just don't get that sort of solidarity in the corporate world, lol. And of course, the war stories. You never run out of conversation when you work with people. I can't wait to get back out there and start menacing...sorry, stupid autocorrect; I meant to say "helpfully interacting" with others, lol.

[TL1]

Lol hell no the customer isn't always right. Most are a pain. Some are really nice. I love the ones that call and yell and cuss like its my fault you didn't pay your mortgage. Sure hardships happen but i did not sign that contract. So blame yourself!

I tend to give the customer what they give me. Obviously I can't cuss at them but I meet their tone quickly. Sometimes this backs them down and they say oh I didn't mean it personally and they get nice. Other times like today I met ones tone equally and they called me a smart ass and asked to speak with a supervisor. Lol be my guest because I surely do not want to deal with you anymore.

Don't get me wrong. I am professional and nice and all that I should be. But I won't put up with any shit either.