The Limp-Wristed Hand Gesture

[Nat]

Originally Posted by dykeumentary

Hi Nat, this is an interesting topic, thanks for starting it.
From your post i can't tell if your grandfather was gay, and it doesn't really matter to me. What i can tell, because i come from a sexist culture, is that for her there was something not "manly" about his love of cooking (in her opinion). That must have been what she was taught.

I think that as a daughter, my mom and i have similar challenges with sexism, and different experiences. When she says sexist things now, I try to move us both forward with compassion and humor. i do address things that come up with her, but i try to do it in the spirit of allies helping each other.

My grandfather is beyond complicated. I might share more about that in an inner sanctum thread, but would prefer not to do that here.

I think perhaps the ugliest thing about my mother's gesture is that I probably taught it to her as a kid.