What every Femme should know...

[JAGG]

Originally Posted by JistMe

Someone out there was meant to be the love of your life... your best friend; your soul mate.
He'll brush the hair out of your eyes, and send you flowers when you least expect it.
He'll stare at you during the movies, even though he paid $30 to see it.
He'll call you to tell you goodnight, or just because he is missing you.
He will call you right back when you hang up on him.
He'll lay with you under the stars listening to your heartbeat... or stay awake all night just to watch you sleep.
He'll kiss your forehead for no reason, and hold your hand in front of your Dad. He'll say you are just as beautiful without makeup on, and show you off to the world when you're in sweats.
He will constantly remind you how lucky he is to have you.
He'll look in your eyes and tell you that you are the most beautiful woman in the world, and for the first time in your life... you'll believe it.
You will know when you find him ---
He will be the one who turns to his friends, and says...
"Thats her..."

I have read this poem before on a quote site. It didn't really do much for me. Because if she looks like the joker in sweats I'm going to tell her about it. I'd want her to tell me if I looked bad. Staying up all night watching someone sleep is very creepy. Maybe I'm not very romantic. But just because someone does all these things that doesn't make them the love of my life. I had a gf once who did those things and was cheating on me and stabbing me in the back every chance she got so.....

[Ebon]

It might be a good idea to let her cool off before calling or back or you might get hung up on again.

[BullDog]

Well lucky me, I never have to pay $30 for us to go to the movies because my femme is constantly getting free movie vouchers from her employer because she is a kick ass nurse.

My femme took me out for lunch just yesterday.

Yes I do take her out as well and I am a She.

p.s. she has never hung up on me

[betenoire]

What every Femme should know:

Measure twice cut once. This goes for countertops, neat fabric for throw pillows, and the jeans you need to hem.

How to parallel park. Because driving in circles for 30 minutes looking for a spot you can just pull in to is boring and bad for the environment.

How to brew tea the correct way. Just because it irritates me when you do it wrong.

How to hang up blinds, wall art, and the telephone.

When to call it quits and when to keep on trucking.

How to sneak microwave popcorn and bottled water into a movie matinee because that shit should NEVER cost $30.

And finally that you are worth so much more than some dime-store creepy staring insomniac stalker who won't call you on your shit.

[Julie]

What every Femme should know...

You do not need a butch to complete you.
You do not need an identifying butch (male or female) to validate that you are a Femme.
You can shave your head and still be Femme.
Femme is not about what you wear, but who you are inside.
You are beautiful and not because you are being told by someone... But because you believe it.

The day I have to depend on a Butch to make me feel good about myself... Is the day I have lost who I am.
I am beautiful, because I am Julie - Not because I am told by a butch.

You do not need someone to pay for your dates.
You are an independent woman.
You can change your own oil and if you cannot, you can bring it to the service station.

Dammit... I keep going back to the brushing the hair out of my eyes. Where is it?
If my butch has to keep reminding me how lucky he/hy/she is to have me... I will eventually think they are trying to convince themselves.

This whole thing (while it is sweet in theory) scares me. Not for me, but for the countless Femme's that believe their self worth comes from a being partnered with a Butch.

Julie

[The_Lady_Snow]

Is we have somewhere to go here on BFP...

>LINKY<

[Julie]

Let us not forget.

Being Femme means you honor and respect your Femme Sisters.

Being a Femme's Femme is more important than any Butch on this planet.

[JustJo]

What every femme should know...

...who you are is just fine.

...it's perfectly okay to choose to be alone....in fact, sometimes that's the best choice....for awhile or forever.

...you get to make your own choices....and so do your friends, your family and your partner.

...it's perfectly okay to choose to be coupled....and it's your choice who you do that with.

...you do not need the approval of others to be who you are.

...and finally, you really don't have to pay a plumber $200 to replace the flapper in the toilet....it truly isn't that hard to do.

...you are more resourceful than you may think you are.

[grenade]

Nothing is absolute or applies to everyone. The sentiment behind this was sweet. Thanks for sharing.

[The_Lady_Snow]

Originally Posted by grenade

Nothing is absolute or applies to everyone. The sentiment behind this was sweet. Thanks for sharing.

The sentiment is sweet nonetheless as a Femme I *have* to speak up, lately there have been discussions in this forum about caution, care, duplicity, red flags. It's very easy for people to get swept up with romantic ideals, fantasies and realities get pushed aside..

I would rather educate my fellow community of Femme's of the things they ALREADY are, hearing them from a butch/guy/boi/boy shouldn't make them more valuable than what we see, feel, think and are...


Poetry like this is not the reality that happens to women, we're much more than fluff us Femme's so therefore I feel as a Femme that IS what we should know..

We are what we are because we make it so, NO ONE has control of that my loins don't control my destinies, fantasies, journey's Gender....

[Julie]

Originally Posted by The_Lady_Snow

The sentiment is sweet nonetheless as a Femme I *have* to speak up, lately there have been discussions in this forum about caution, care, duplicity, red flags. It's very easy for people to get swept up with romantic ideals, fantasies and realities get pushed aside..

I would rather educate my fellow community of Femme's of the things the ALREADY are, hearing them from a butch/guy/boi/boy shouldn't make them more valuable than what we see, feel, think and are...


Poetry like this is not the reality that happens to women, we're much more than fluff us Femme's so therefore I feel as a Femme that IS what we should know..

We are what we are because we make it so, NO ONE has control of that my loins don't control my destinies, fantasies, journey's Gender....

You are so right Snow...
And in part, this is what being FEMME is about.
We call out the bullshit and we take care of our Femme Sisters.
We make sure they are not swindled or taken advantage of.

And sometimes... We have to blow up the fairy tale, just to keep them safe.

Julie who is so proud and honored to call you Sister.

[grenade]

Originally Posted by The_Lady_Snow

The sentiment is sweet nonetheless as a Femme I *have* to speak up, lately there have been discussions in this forum about caution, care, duplicity, red flags. It's very easy for people to get swept up with romantic ideals, fantasies and realities get pushed aside..

I would rather educate my fellow community of Femme's of the things they ALREADY are, hearing them from a butch/guy/boi/boy shouldn't make them more valuable than what we see, feel, think and are...


Poetry like this is not the reality that happens to women, we're much more than fluff us Femme's so therefore I feel as a Femme that IS what we should know..

We are what we are because we make it so, NO ONE has control of that my loins don't control my destinies, fantasies, journey's Gender....

and you can not speak for all femmes any more than I can, or the original poster. A lot of femmes might read this and swoon. Are they wrong in feeling this type of adoration meets certain desires and needs they might have? It might be more accurate for a person to read this and say not me. I am not THAT femme.

[1QuirkyKiwi]

Originally Posted by apretty

You don't have to be a simpering idiot to meet and keep a good butch, and s/he's half-way decent s/he'll have some appropriate boundaries and won't be calling your ass back when you hang up on her--You'll then know you've found the one because s/he's got a backbone that keeps him/her strong during trips to the ER and Thanksgiving with your fucked-up family (where she might hold your hand, but most likely is too busy carving the turkey) and you'll be able to actually lean on her once in a while but guess what--She's going to require you to have some personal accountability and won't be staring at you slack-jawed during any of it.

Originally Posted by JAGG

I have read this poem before on a quote site. It didn't really do much for me. Because if she looks like the joker in sweats I'm going to tell her about it. I'd want her to tell me if I looked bad. Staying up all night watching someone sleep is very creepy. Maybe I'm not very romantic. But just because someone does all these things that doesn't make them the love of my life. I had a gf once who did those things and was cheating on me and stabbing me in the back every chance she got so.....

It was me that posted it on the quote thread….my reason for doing so, was to suggest a partner (however they identify) as gently loving and adoring their Femme in a positive way.

Sometimes it’s nice when your partner watches you sleep or you them; there’s a tenderness about it; a deeply loving trust.

No-one looks their best all the time, yet, your partner will think you’re beautiful to them anyway because they see all the facets that make their Femme who they are and some of the reasons they fell in love with them.

I appreciate something like this doesn’t stoke the fire for everyone, yet, for some, it’s nice to know they are adored in a gently loving way.

It still shouldn’t take away from any Femme what they need or should have; that’s for each of us to decide.

[Novelafemme]

Originally Posted by 1QuirkyKiwi

It was me that posted it on the quote thread….my reason for doing so, was to suggest a partner (however they identify) as gently loving and adoring their Femme in a positive way.

Sometimes it’s nice when your partner watches you sleep or you them; there’s a tenderness about it; a deeply loving trust.

No-one looks their best all the time, yet, your partner will think you’re beautiful to them anyway because they see all the facets that make their Femme who they are and some of the reasons they fell in love with them.

I appreciate something like this doesn’t stoke the fire for everyone, yet, for some, it’s nice to know they are adored in a gently loving way.

It still shouldn’t take away from any Femme what they need or should have; that’s for each of us to decide.

I thought it was sweet AND sort of creepy...but mostly sweet. I'm all about mushy sentiments like that, though. The male pronouns threw me off for sure.

I guess I have a big problem being put on a pedestal by anyone, my partner included. It's too damned much pressure! And I certainly don't want to feel like I am the center of anyone's universe...a part of it, yes, but let's keep everything in perspective. And please don't ever make the mistake of thinking you are the boss of me. Cause HOLY SHIT will there be trouble! I also don't think there's anything wrong with "needing" someone. That needing doesn't necessarily have to mandate something unhealthy. It can be as simple as needing someone's loving presence in your life...their laughter, their support, whatever it is they bring into your world that makes each day a bit brighter and more enjoyable. That can leave some feeling vulnerable, yes...but not wrong.

Thanks for sharing, OP.

[1QuirkyKiwi]

Originally Posted by Novelafemme

I thought it was sweet AND sort of creepy...but mostly sweet. I'm all about mushy sentiments like that, though. The male pronouns threw me off for sure.

I guess I have a big problem being put on a pedestal by anyone, my partner included. It's too damned much pressure! And I certainly don't want to feel like I am the center of anyone's universe...a part of it, yes, but let's keep everything in perspective. And please don't ever make the mistake of thinking you are the boss of me. Cause HOLY SHIT will there be trouble! I also don't think there's anything wrong with "needing" someone. That needing doesn't necessarily have to mandate something unhealthy. It can be as simple as needing someone's loving presence in your life...their laughter, their support, whatever it is they bring into your world that makes each day a bit brighter and more enjoyable. That can leave some feeling vulnerable, yes...but not wrong.

Thanks for sharing, OP.

The male pronouns make me feel very uncomfortable, too! When I posted the prose in the Quote thread I changed the male pronouns to female ones, lol!

I’m comfortable with being gently adored in a healthy way, but the idea of being put on a pedestal freaks me out! I don’t put my partner on one, either. For me, I adore my partner for hys/her essences and qualities as the person they are and accept that they are their own person, as I am very much my own.

It’s good to have the vulnerability in a healthy relationship as it creates a bond when communication is open and honest.

[Medusa]

I might go start a thread in the Femme section but I do want to comment on Snowy's and June's posts about the unspoken sisterhood between Femmes.

In my world, and in the circle of friends I have, I expect my Femme sisters to know that they have value regardless of who they are screwing and if they don't yet feel that power, they have to be doing the work to get there.

I think when we talk about "The Femme Sisterhood", we are talking about the expectation that we have (or at least that I have with my close friends and that they also have of me) an open, honest, authentic relationship not only to each other but to ourselves. Because if you aren't in touch with your damage, you have the potential to radiate that out onto other people.

My girls are smart people who often screw up but who know when they need to be working on something or at the very least are able to hear it when one of us says, "That thing you're doing concerns me because it looks like you are acting out or out of control."

We're able to hear those words from one another and take with us a sense of LOVE rather than those words sounding to us like "I want you to act different because I'm trying to control you or am jealous of you".
Because being surrounded by Femmes who get you and love you makes you feel really safe and secure and you start to accept the love that they want to give you rather than being suspicious of it. (as we are often taught to do with one another)