What every Femme should know...

[1QuirkyKiwi]

Originally Posted by JAGG

What every femme should know- truck drivers in semi's can see everything you are doing in your car, we can read the gum wrapper on the floorboard behind your seat. We can see everything. Everything! And yes when you pass by they ARE looking and you can bet you're being talked about on the CB. Thought you should know that.

Now that's creepy!

[Novelafemme]

Originally Posted by 1QuirkyKiwi

It was me that posted it on the quote thread….my reason for doing so, was to suggest a partner (however they identify) as gently loving and adoring their Femme in a positive way.

Sometimes it’s nice when your partner watches you sleep or you them; there’s a tenderness about it; a deeply loving trust.

No-one looks their best all the time, yet, your partner will think you’re beautiful to them anyway because they see all the facets that make their Femme who they are and some of the reasons they fell in love with them.

I appreciate something like this doesn’t stoke the fire for everyone, yet, for some, it’s nice to know they are adored in a gently loving way.

It still shouldn’t take away from any Femme what they need or should have; that’s for each of us to decide.

I thought it was sweet AND sort of creepy...but mostly sweet. I'm all about mushy sentiments like that, though. The male pronouns threw me off for sure.

I guess I have a big problem being put on a pedestal by anyone, my partner included. It's too damned much pressure! And I certainly don't want to feel like I am the center of anyone's universe...a part of it, yes, but let's keep everything in perspective. And please don't ever make the mistake of thinking you are the boss of me. Cause HOLY SHIT will there be trouble! I also don't think there's anything wrong with "needing" someone. That needing doesn't necessarily have to mandate something unhealthy. It can be as simple as needing someone's loving presence in your life...their laughter, their support, whatever it is they bring into your world that makes each day a bit brighter and more enjoyable. That can leave some feeling vulnerable, yes...but not wrong.

Thanks for sharing, OP.

[Corkey]

My Femme would kick my ass for most of the op post. Jus saying.

[dixie]

Originally Posted by JAGG

What every femme should know- truck drivers in semi's can see everything you are doing in your car, we can read the gum wrapper on the floorboard behind your seat. We can see everything. Everything! And yes when you pass by they ARE looking and you can bet you're being talked about on the CB. Thought you should know that.

As someone whose family owns a trucking company, I can attest to the truth in this statement. I've heard more "beaver spotting" CB transmissions than I would care to remember. smh

[1QuirkyKiwi]

Originally Posted by Novelafemme

I thought it was sweet AND sort of creepy...but mostly sweet. I'm all about mushy sentiments like that, though. The male pronouns threw me off for sure.

I guess I have a big problem being put on a pedestal by anyone, my partner included. It's too damned much pressure! And I certainly don't want to feel like I am the center of anyone's universe...a part of it, yes, but let's keep everything in perspective. And please don't ever make the mistake of thinking you are the boss of me. Cause HOLY SHIT will there be trouble! I also don't think there's anything wrong with "needing" someone. That needing doesn't necessarily have to mandate something unhealthy. It can be as simple as needing someone's loving presence in your life...their laughter, their support, whatever it is they bring into your world that makes each day a bit brighter and more enjoyable. That can leave some feeling vulnerable, yes...but not wrong.

Thanks for sharing, OP.

The male pronouns make me feel very uncomfortable, too! When I posted the prose in the Quote thread I changed the male pronouns to female ones, lol!

I’m comfortable with being gently adored in a healthy way, but the idea of being put on a pedestal freaks me out! I don’t put my partner on one, either. For me, I adore my partner for hys/her essences and qualities as the person they are and accept that they are their own person, as I am very much my own.

It’s good to have the vulnerability in a healthy relationship as it creates a bond when communication is open and honest.

[dixie]

I also agree that sentiment behind the op's post seems sweet in that "knight in shining armor hollywood fairy tale" kinda way, so I do get it.

For me, some days I'm the kind of femme who is totally not into it. Then some days, *I* want that hollywood fairy tale feeling.

Is it for me every day? No.

Is it for EVERY femme? No.

Some of us don't need it or don't want it.

Some days though, some of us do want it.

I wouldn't chalk it up to EVERY femme though. Just like I wouldn't chalk up similar things to those who are not femme. We ALL have different wants and needs, and it's important to remember that rather than the one-size-fits-all feel that I get from the thread title.

[grenade]

Originally Posted by Julie

Let us not forget.

Being Femme means you honor and respect your Femme Sisters.

Being a Femme's Femme is more important than any Butch on this planet.

really?? I honor those who deserve honor. I respect those who respect me. Femme, butch, straight, purple.... I don't see the difference. Maybe I'm missing something.

[Medusa]

I might go start a thread in the Femme section but I do want to comment on Snowy's and June's posts about the unspoken sisterhood between Femmes.

In my world, and in the circle of friends I have, I expect my Femme sisters to know that they have value regardless of who they are screwing and if they don't yet feel that power, they have to be doing the work to get there.

I think when we talk about "The Femme Sisterhood", we are talking about the expectation that we have (or at least that I have with my close friends and that they also have of me) an open, honest, authentic relationship not only to each other but to ourselves. Because if you aren't in touch with your damage, you have the potential to radiate that out onto other people.

My girls are smart people who often screw up but who know when they need to be working on something or at the very least are able to hear it when one of us says, "That thing you're doing concerns me because it looks like you are acting out or out of control."

We're able to hear those words from one another and take with us a sense of LOVE rather than those words sounding to us like "I want you to act different because I'm trying to control you or am jealous of you".
Because being surrounded by Femmes who get you and love you makes you feel really safe and secure and you start to accept the love that they want to give you rather than being suspicious of it. (as we are often taught to do with one another)

[Julie]

Originally Posted by grenade

really?? I honor those who deserve honor. I respect those who respect me. Femme, butch, straight, purple.... I don't see the difference. Maybe I'm missing something.

I do hope one day you will get what I am trying to say... Without a defensive tone.

This is about being part of something much bigger than any of us. It is about honoring our Femme Sisters. It is about not allowing a butch to separate us, or any other person for that matter. It is about caring for one another and having each others backs. No matter if it gets icky.

Simply... Sisterhood.

It's okay if you don't get it. So, yes - Really!!!

Julie

[Novelafemme]

"We're able to hear those words from one another and take with us a sense of LOVE rather than those words sounding to us like "I want you to act different because I'm trying to control you or am jealous of you".
Because being surrounded by Femmes who get you and love you makes you feel really safe and secure and you start to accept the love that they want to give you rather than being suspicious of it. (as we are often taught to do with one another)"

I really love this a lot!

[stargazingboi]

Originally Posted by JistMe

Someone out there was meant to be the love of your life... your best friend; your soul mate.
He'll brush the hair out of your eyes, and send you flowers when you least expect it.
He'll stare at you during the movies, even though he paid $30 to see it.
He'll call you to tell you goodnight, or just because he is missing you.
He will call you right back when you hang up on him.
He'll lay with you under the stars listening to your heartbeat... or stay awake all night just to watch you sleep.
He'll kiss your forehead for no reason, and hold your hand in front of your Dad. He'll say you are just as beautiful without makeup on, and show you off to the world when you're in sweats.
He will constantly remind you how lucky he is to have you.
He'll look in your eyes and tell you that you are the most beautiful woman in the world, and for the first time in your life... you'll believe it.
You will know when you find him ---
He will be the one who turns to his friends, and says...
"Thats her..."

I must admit, I read this thread a few time and found myself perplexed. The thread was originally brought to my attention and I thought...hmm let me check this out.

At first when I saw the title I wondered what do all femmes need to know? I’m not a femme...so, really I wouldn’t have a clue, but I’m always interested in learning. I’ll be honest, I thought at first it was a femme thread written and started by a femme, then, I saw it was indeed started by male ID individual.

When I glanced at the actual post I thought to myself…hmm. I don’t know the original poster, and I have no idea what they were truly thinking when they posted it. So, I can only speak from what I took from it and how I felt when I read it.

To me it felt as though the poster saw something, and related to what it was saying and decided to share…similar to the thread that is about how do you know someone is into you? (I forget the actual title of the thread). It’s as if the original poster was saying to the femme community this is how I express love…this how you know I love you.

We all express love differently and for some it’s hard to put into words because they stumble or they struggle to be romantic. So, they express their love differently…like calling...giving compliments, seeing the depth of her beauty, beyond make-up and all that other stuff.

For several posts it seemed that people interpreted as I did…then it turned into something else. What perplexed me was the twisting and turning of what followed. I’m not sure the original poster was trying to say this is how I validate you…or trying to stand up on some soap box beating their chest saying I am male hear me roar, but merely saying...hey, for those I have loved before who may not have known and for the one love I am hoping to find…please know this is how you’ll know that I love you.

[The_Lady_Snow]

Stargazingboi it's unfair to say ANYONE twisted or turned anything, a few Femme's came in to give opinions and VOICE what they feel Femme's should know. I mean if anyone should know what Femme's know is Femmes... I find it empowering that so many (Femmes) chose to use their voice

I hope we continue to voice our likes, needs, wants and desires for many many moons.

[Mr Nice Guy]

I like asking Femmes questions. Now if I could just get them to answer. Lol
Seriously tho, All you Femmes rock!!!!

[stargazingboi]

Originally Posted by The_Lady_Snow

Stargazingboi it's unfair to say ANYONE twisted or turned anything, a few Femme's came in to give opinions and VOICE what they feel Femme's should know. I mean if anyone should know what Femme's know is Femmes... I find it empowering that so many (Femmes) chose to use their voice

I hope we continue to voice our likes, needs, wants and desires for many many moons.

Lady_Snow....but the thread did twist and turn. It went in one direction and then another, much like a winding road. Now mind you I didn't say anything about the femmes who decided to voice their thoughts and their empowerment..did I? Empowerment in general is always encouraged for all that exist

I merely stated I got perplexed by the course of the thread....

[girl_dee]

What THIS femme wants (not should) to know about me, and what i want others to know about me;

i am special

i am unique, we are ALL unique!

i don't need anyone to validate who i am

i am strong and submissive

i am loved, cherished and owned

i am not anyone's *better half*, i am whole as i am

i can take care of myself, but i may choose differently


i am FEMME!!!

i am going to find that femme thread that i love and bump that sucker! RAWR!

[Corkey]

What I want my honey to know is :
Thank you baby for the sushi, it was wonderful of you to think of me while at work.
I was almost apoplectic for where the colander was, found it!
The light is on and the cat is hogging the heater, again!
In other words, all I want for you is be the woman you are and the Femme you want to be.

[Tawse]

also - I don't call Gillian back if she hung up on me. Chances are if she hung up - it's cause I was being a royal dick.. and if I was being a royal dick - the conversation had gotten to a completely nonproductive point.

And besides, I tried doing that - and it results in a longer time out.


And I *hate* being ignored - so longer time outs are to be avoided.

[JistMe]

Wow. I found it somewhere, and posted. I didn't pick the language/pronouns. It was late, I just posted it. I actually intended it to end up in an entirely different thread, but lookie here... its a thread of it's own. lol If I offended someone.... I apologize?

[JistMe]

P. S. .... This is why I dont post. It was not meant to imply that 'femmes NEED a butch' or anything of the sort. But, it's cool. Gives everyone something to analyze and post on. Tear it up!

[girl_dee]

Originally Posted by JistMe

P. S. .... This is why I dont post. It was not meant to imply that 'femmes NEED a butch' or anything of the sort. But, it's cool. Gives everyone something to analyze and post on. Tear it up!

oh no! it gives us stuff to celebrate!