The Love list.

thedivahrrrself · 06-14-2012, 06:23 PM

Not looking for a relationship, but I'm glad you bumped this thread.

Maybe a list will help me over the next few months.
YSK I reserve the right to amend this from time to time.

MUST-HAVES:

Compassion
Sincerity
Decisiveness
Honesty, even if it means sacrificing a little tact
Intelligence
Must be a geek/wonk about something, even if it's something I think is lame (like the reproduction habits of spiders, or how to build a transmission)
Healthy Sex Drive (sorry, but it's true)
Gentleness - must make me feel safe
Protectiveness - see above
Butchiness - that certain je ne se quois
Likes dogs
Treats people well, this includes the waitress and the bus driver

MUST-NOTS:

Excessive Insecurity
A need to control me (I rebel; I can't help it)
Meanness
Lying
Manipulative
Paranoia
Smokers (sorry, I just don't think I can live with that again)
Chronically unemployed
Laziness

JUST ICING (because who doesn't love cake?):

Driven, goal-oriented
Might want kids
Good conversationalist (this is a must in an LDR, but icing otherwise)
Good grammar
Semi-obsessive hand-washer (it's good to have things in common)
Values education and the pursuit of knowledge
Loves museums
Will go with me to the opera
Doesn't think my girl music is lame ♪♫♪

thedivahrrrself · 06-14-2012, 07:09 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by thedivahrrrself

Must be a geek/wonk about something, even if it's something I think is lame (like the reproduction habits of spiders, or how to build a transmission)

Apparently you only RE-build transmissions. (Doesn't someone build them somewhere? Or do they just appear built?)

I stand corrected.

And I know geeks who are geeky about their cars. I'm just sayin'

Mr Nice Guy · 06-14-2012, 07:10 PM

Great list!!!

ValKyrie · 06-15-2012, 12:20 PM

I made a list in therapy before I met the "right" someone and she had a list too. We both lived up to each others lists and I am still reeling in how well we fit.

Butch
Confident in herself
Take charge in the bedroom
Loves kids
Neat and tidy
Takes pride in her appearance
Good manners
Proper grammar
Likes food
Well read
Is stable financially, career wise, and emotionally
Has own interests
Has own friends
Wants to do things apart from me
Wants to do things with me
High sex drive
Appreciates my femmeness but is ok with me getting dirty, working on my car, etc
Likes to go out at times, but also likes the quiet intimate Times
Likes to cuddle
Is not intimidated by my self confidence and fierceness
Likes to watch me play roller derby but does not want to play herself
Appreciates my independence but allows me to be weak at times
Older then me
Family is important

Mr Nice Guy · 06-15-2012, 01:05 PM

This I got from an Oprah show and they say it works!! Sort of like a vision board. Which I need to make.

thedivahrrrself · 06-15-2012, 01:46 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Mr Nice Guy

This I got from an Oprah show and they say it works!! Sort of like a vision board. Which I need to make.

Now you have to tell us non-Oprah fans what a vision board is...

Mr Nice Guy · 06-15-2012, 03:10 PM

Ok I'll try to explain. But I'm not an Oprah fan. I was sick at home and bored and had her on. Anyway, this is what it is. Say you want something real bad and wishing it doesn't work. What you do is get some construction paper and some used magazines and cut out what you want like a picture of a house or anything. You paste it on paper and put it somewhere where you can see it. It's all about positive energy and putting what you want out in the world. They also talked about The Love List. You put down what your looking for in a partner and then put it away. Hopefully that explained it.

06-14-2012, 06:23 PM	#1
thedivahrrrself Senior Member How Do You Identify?: Queer Sapiosexual Femme Relationship Status: Mrs. Grumpy Cat Tournaments Won: 4 Join Date: Oct 2011 Location: 8,660 feet high in the Andes Posts: 2,640 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 10,519 Thanked 11,658 Times in 2,292 Posts Rep Power: 21474852	Not looking for a relationship, but I'm glad you bumped this thread. Maybe a list will help me over the next few months. YSK I reserve the right to amend this from time to time. MUST-HAVES: Compassion Sincerity Decisiveness Honesty, even if it means sacrificing a little tact Intelligence Must be a geek/wonk about something, even if it's something I think is lame (like the reproduction habits of spiders, or how to build a transmission) Healthy Sex Drive (sorry, but it's true) Gentleness - must make me feel safe Protectiveness - see above Butchiness - that certain je ne se quois Likes dogs Treats people well, this includes the waitress and the bus driver MUST-NOTS: Excessive Insecurity A need to control me (I rebel; I can't help it) Meanness Lying Manipulative Paranoia Smokers (sorry, I just don't think I can live with that again) Chronically unemployed Laziness JUST ICING (because who doesn't love cake?): Driven, goal-oriented Might want kids Good conversationalist (this is a must in an LDR, but icing otherwise) Good grammar Semi-obsessive hand-washer (it's good to have things in common) Values education and the pursuit of knowledge Loves museums Will go with me to the opera Doesn't think my girl music is lame ♪♫♪ __________________ Small business owners around the world use microfinance to help expand their businesses and provide for their families. You can help! Click here to learn about Kiva.

06-14-2012, 07:10 PM	#3
Mr Nice Guy Timed Out How Do You Identify?: Kind, sweet, loving, romantic and a rare Butch. :) Relationship Status: I don't drive a Uhaul. :) Join Date: May 2011 Location: Another New Englander Posts: 1,768 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 2,035 Thanked 4,894 Times in 1,307 Posts Rep Power: 0	Great list!!!

06-15-2012, 12:20 PM	#4
ValKyrie Junior Member How Do You Identify?: Femme Lesbian Preferred Pronoun?: She/Her Relationship Status: Over the moon Join Date: Jun 2012 Location: Portland, OR Posts: 12 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 39 Thanked 75 Times in 11 Posts Rep Power: 1068895	I made a list in therapy before I met the "right" someone and she had a list too. We both lived up to each others lists and I am still reeling in how well we fit. Butch Confident in herself Take charge in the bedroom Loves kids Neat and tidy Takes pride in her appearance Good manners Proper grammar Likes food Well read Is stable financially, career wise, and emotionally Has own interests Has own friends Wants to do things apart from me Wants to do things with me High sex drive Appreciates my femmeness but is ok with me getting dirty, working on my car, etc Likes to go out at times, but also likes the quiet intimate Times Likes to cuddle Is not intimidated by my self confidence and fierceness Likes to watch me play roller derby but does not want to play herself Appreciates my independence but allows me to be weak at times Older then me Family is important

06-15-2012, 01:05 PM	#5
Mr Nice Guy Timed Out How Do You Identify?: Kind, sweet, loving, romantic and a rare Butch. :) Relationship Status: I don't drive a Uhaul. :) Join Date: May 2011 Location: Another New Englander Posts: 1,768 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 2,035 Thanked 4,894 Times in 1,307 Posts Rep Power: 0	This I got from an Oprah show and they say it works!! Sort of like a vision board. Which I need to make.

06-15-2012, 03:10 PM	#7
Mr Nice Guy Timed Out How Do You Identify?: Kind, sweet, loving, romantic and a rare Butch. :) Relationship Status: I don't drive a Uhaul. :) Join Date: May 2011 Location: Another New Englander Posts: 1,768 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 2,035 Thanked 4,894 Times in 1,307 Posts Rep Power: 0	Ok I'll try to explain. But I'm not an Oprah fan. I was sick at home and bored and had her on. Anyway, this is what it is. Say you want something real bad and wishing it doesn't work. What you do is get some construction paper and some used magazines and cut out what you want like a picture of a house or anything. You paste it on paper and put it somewhere where you can see it. It's all about positive energy and putting what you want out in the world. They also talked about The Love List. You put down what your looking for in a partner and then put it away. Hopefully that explained it.