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08-19-2012, 11:16 AM
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#581 |
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Infamous Member
How Do You Identify?:
femme Relationship Status:
attached Join Date: Dec 2009
Location: .
Posts: 6,896
Thanks: 29,046
Thanked 13,095 Times in 3,386 Posts
Rep Power: 21474858   |
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08-20-2012, 05:09 PM
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#582 |
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Timed Out - Permanent
How Do You Identify?:
butch stone Preferred Pronoun?:
masculine ones work best... Relationship Status:
♥ engaged to spritz ♥ 
Join Date: Oct 2011
Location: bangor, maine
Posts: 3,344
Thanks: 20,720
Thanked 16,492 Times in 2,972 Posts
Rep Power: 0 |
Well it didn't happen today but.....
When my grandson, yeh the one in my gallery pics, sings Old McDonald's Farm... E, I, E, I, O... nope. It's more like A, E, I, O, U and sometimes Y!!  I think the lil guy has his songs mixed up... 
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08-20-2012, 05:26 PM
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#583 |
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Member
How Do You Identify?:
male/TG 
Join Date: Nov 2009
Location: England
Posts: 220
Thanks: 51
Thanked 398 Times in 122 Posts
Rep Power: 2583511 |
my missus's brother, he drinks tea when everyone else is drinking wine, maybe thats why he has the 6 pack and i dont, lol! here we are hanging out this afternoon......................http://
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08-21-2012, 11:03 AM
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#584 |
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Senior Member
How Do You Identify?:
queer fucker Preferred Pronoun?:
Mine Relationship Status:
I'm dating myself. It's really working out. I think I'm the one!!! 
Join Date: Jan 2012
Location: To your right and a bit South.
Posts: 1,522
Thanks: 108
Thanked 1,470 Times in 445 Posts
Rep Power: 19646657 |
Two campers are hiking in the woods when one is bitten on the rear end by a rattlesnake.
"I’ll go into town for a doctor," the other says. He runs ten miles to a small town and finds the town’s only doctor, who is delivering a baby. "I can’t leave," the doctor says. ‘But here’s what to do. Take a knife, cut a little X where the bite is, suck out the poison and spit it on the ground." The guy ruins back to his friend, who is in agony. ‘What did the doctor say?" the victim asks. "He says you’re gonna die." |
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08-22-2012, 10:27 AM
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#585 |
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Infamous Member
How Do You Identify?:
femme Relationship Status:
attached Join Date: Dec 2009
Location: .
Posts: 6,896
Thanks: 29,046
Thanked 13,095 Times in 3,386 Posts
Rep Power: 21474858 |
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08-22-2012, 10:49 AM
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#586 | |
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Junior Member
How Do You Identify?:
Butch as fuck Relationship Status:
alone until i heal Join Date: Apr 2010
Location: S W Ontario
Posts: 34
Thanks: 24
Thanked 124 Times in 26 Posts
Rep Power: 977871 |
Quote:
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08-24-2012, 09:32 AM
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#587 |
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Timed Out
How Do You Identify?:
yes dear Preferred Pronoun?:
she Join Date: Nov 2009
Location: south florida
Posts: 2,494
Thanks: 3,264
Thanked 6,737 Times in 1,777 Posts
Rep Power: 0 |
the other night Dixie and I were doing our usual nightly texting when suddenly
Dixie: Sooo i see you're paying the sluts again Me: .gif "Say What?") Dixie: PLAYING the SLOTS!! OMG!! me  
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08-24-2012, 10:35 AM
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#588 |
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Member
How Do You Identify?:
Queer. Femme. Preferred Pronoun?:
girl ones 
Join Date: Mar 2010
Location: Twin Cities
Posts: 1,020
Thanks: 1,460
Thanked 2,096 Times in 532 Posts
Rep Power: 21474853 |
last night, this cracked me up..
my 5 yrs old started asking me about when 'he was in my tummy'.. he wanted to know if he made my tummy wiggle and poke out and such... so I'm describing to him how it felt and what it looked like in kiddo terms, and we are totally cracking up about it.. all of the sudden he gets serious and says, "momma... did I drink milk?" and stares at my boobs. uhhhh. I answered and then lmao'd. oooohh, the questions from the mouths of babes.
__________________
 ...not your average betty.
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08-24-2012, 04:22 PM
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#589 |
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Infamous Member
How Do You Identify?:
femme Relationship Status:
attached Join Date: Dec 2009
Location: .
Posts: 6,896
Thanks: 29,046
Thanked 13,095 Times in 3,386 Posts
Rep Power: 21474858 |
TGIF GIF Party!
Via Jezebel: Celebrate the End of One of the Shittiest Weeks Ever with a Gif Party!
This week was, pardon my French, a piece of fucking merde. The news was so bad that we all became bored with bad news. To make matters worse, this week stretched on and on, like that time you spent an hour making out with the young man who your memory would come to know as Halitosis Guy you were 18 and too polite to say anything. There's good news, though — it must have been crap, but it's over now. Let's gif it out. click on title to crack up 
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08-24-2012, 08:36 PM
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#590 |
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Infamous Member
How Do You Identify?:
Femme Relationship Status:
. Join Date: Feb 2010
Location: .
Posts: 5,530
Thanks: 4,478
Thanked 12,947 Times in 3,419 Posts
Rep Power: 21474857 |
me, Clay and my shoes...
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08-26-2012, 07:12 PM
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#591 |
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Timed Out - Permanent
How Do You Identify?:
butch stone Preferred Pronoun?:
masculine ones work best... Relationship Status:
♥ engaged to spritz ♥
Join Date: Oct 2011
Location: bangor, maine
Posts: 3,344
Thanks: 20,720
Thanked 16,492 Times in 2,972 Posts
Rep Power: 0 |
What cracked me up...
the general: why does your drink have two straws in it? spritz: probably because i ordered a diet drink and you two didn't, so this is the waitress's way of know mine apart from yours. me: (teasingly toward the general) ohhhhh I thought it was cause mom was supposed to drink from her mouth AND her nose! the genral: ugh! your gross! Ahahahahaaaaaa I love messin' with that kid! 
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| The Following 3 Users Say Thank You to jac For This Useful Post: |
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08-26-2012, 07:52 PM
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#592 |
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Senior Member
How Do You Identify?:
Fiery, Sassy, Tough As Nails, Femme Tomboy Preferred Pronoun?:
She Relationship Status:
I am your favorite hello and hardest goodbye. Join Date: Nov 2009
Location: NC & CO
Posts: 4,806
Thanks: 4,624
Thanked 12,193 Times in 3,779 Posts
Rep Power: 21474856 |
TOO MANY THINGS this weekend cracked me up!!!!
a cute little boy wading in the creek, yelling out "OH IT'S WARM HERE! FISH PEE!!" ... I absolutely fell in love with that little guy this weekend! He's the kind of kid that you NEVER want to grow up! He'd come off with so many one liners, I should have written them down! I nicknamed him "blue boy" because every time he was in the water too long, he'd turn blue!! But you had to DRAG him out! a camping companion to crack jokes with all weekend and hear them say "you're sooooo bad, girl!" every time I cracked a funny and surprised them! privately cracking jokes with my companion about how I would crush a certain guy's ego if I got his fire going for him when he couldn't... (you had to see and interact with this guy to know what I mean...) needless to say, if it wasn't for me, they would have been eating cold hot dogs! the sweet young mother who was with that guy calling us "pioneering women" this morning when they saw our raging, blazing firepit... and me yelling back "WE CHEATED! We used a firestarter block wrapped in paper!" ... (her bf had been using wet wood) This morning, "blue boy" came wading down river and yelled out, very proud "WE CAUGHT A FISH!!"... I asked how big? He held his tiny hands out BIIIIIGGG but quickly moved them back together about the size of a peanut butter sandwich... too cute His brother came wading up behind him, and I noticed he had a handful of fishing line and was intently watching something in the water... he yelled out "WE CAUGHT A FISH!!" then he pulled out this tiny little brim at the end of his line, he gently placed it back in the water and gave it extra fishing line... We CRACKED UP!!! He was "Walking" his fish like a dog on a leash!!! allowing it plenty of line to swim down stream... I hollered at him "AWWW HOW WOULD YOU FEEL IF YOU HAD A HOOK IN YOUR JAW?" ... he responded "we didn't use a hook, we used a weight and thread it through his gills where he doesn't feel a thing." .... POOR FISHIE!! I laughed so hard this weekend!
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She has been through hell, so believe me when I say, fear her when she looks into a fire and smiles. ~E.Corona~ |
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08-27-2012, 12:22 AM
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#593 |
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Senior Member
How Do You Identify?:
Fiery, Sassy, Tough As Nails, Femme Tomboy Preferred Pronoun?:
She Relationship Status:
I am your favorite hello and hardest goodbye. Join Date: Nov 2009
Location: NC & CO
Posts: 4,806
Thanks: 4,624
Thanked 12,193 Times in 3,779 Posts
Rep Power: 21474856 |
lots more laughing ...
spending the last 4 hours on the phone, cracking up and sharing stories about the kids in our lives and all the "out of the mouths of babes " things that we fondly recall...
me spending hours on the phone with ANYBODY is rare enough to make me laugh!
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She has been through hell, so believe me when I say, fear her when she looks into a fire and smiles. ~E.Corona~ |
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08-30-2012, 01:36 PM
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#594 |
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Timed Out - Permanent
How Do You Identify?:
butch stone Preferred Pronoun?:
masculine ones work best... Relationship Status:
♥ engaged to spritz ♥
Join Date: Oct 2011
Location: bangor, maine
Posts: 3,344
Thanks: 20,720
Thanked 16,492 Times in 2,972 Posts
Rep Power: 0 |
What cracked me up today...
daughter: so we took ju to his preschool for openhouse to check out his room and meet his teacher. me: oh yeh how'd that go? daughter: omg he was sooooo excited, he squealed! me: that's sooooo awesome! julian: boobeh i squealed!! *giggle giggle chuckle laugh* That kid, I swear, he's gonna leave his mark at that preschool!
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| The Following 2 Users Say Thank You to jac For This Useful Post: |
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08-30-2012, 07:10 PM
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#595 |
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Senior Member
How Do You Identify?:
Butch Relationship Status:
Flying Solo 
Join Date: Apr 2011
Location: PNW
Posts: 2,258
Thanks: 6,749
Thanked 8,047 Times in 1,618 Posts
Rep Power: 21474853 |
Mr. Poodle Pants and Panjo...
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08-31-2012, 11:02 PM
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#596 |
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Timed Out - Permanent
How Do You Identify?:
butch stone Preferred Pronoun?:
masculine ones work best... Relationship Status:
♥ engaged to spritz ♥
Join Date: Oct 2011
Location: bangor, maine
Posts: 3,344
Thanks: 20,720
Thanked 16,492 Times in 2,972 Posts
Rep Power: 0 |
Two staff in the back office. One had her pre-teen child with her for the evening.
Mind you, I can only hear this conversation. I was at the computer typing logs... child: Mom what is this thing? staff: What thing? child: This weird brown thing? mom: Oh hmmmm well it's a penis. child: OMG whaaaaat??? La la la, I can't hear youuuuuuuuu (assuming fingers in ears) mom: You asked. child: What are you people doing with this thing here? mom: We teach the kids on the streets the proper way to put on a condom. child: OMG I really don't want to know this from you! mom: Meet my co-worker! Ahahahaaaaaa oh the highlight of my evenings
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| The Following 2 Users Say Thank You to jac For This Useful Post: |
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09-01-2012, 08:10 PM
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#597 |
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Timed Out
How Do You Identify?:
femme Preferred Pronoun?:
her, she...female ones... Relationship Status:
married to Arcstriker Join Date: Jul 2012
Location: CT
Posts: 143
Thanks: 37
Thanked 407 Times in 100 Posts
Rep Power: 0 |
I have had my current car for over 6 years and I have taken very good care of her...we are getting to the point where I will be trading her in soon, what with her low miles and pristine body...and today, while at the grocery store parking lot, I just figured out she has a 5-CD changer. Quite honestly I had no idea that this was the case until I had to switch off Spice Radio in the parking lot. In my haste to block my radio porn I pushed a button for my CD changer, and it was only then that I found that I had 4 more CD's I could load. Almost 7 years and 65+ miles I find this out now??? Really? How did I miss that? On the way home from market I immediately loaded the following:
Jimmy Buffett Songs You Know By Heart Jimmy Buffett A White Sport Coat and a Pink Crustacean Jimmy Buffett Barometer Soup Jimmy Buffett Changes in Attitudes Changes In Lattitudes Jimmy Buffett Coconut Telegraph... I already had Jimmy Buffett License to Chill but I kicked it out for the above listed 5... Oh, and BTW, I am fond of Jimmy Buffett... |
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09-01-2012, 09:43 PM
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#598 |
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Moderator
How Do You Identify?:
As a Tiger of course Preferred Pronoun?:
Not the Old Man Relationship Status:
Two Tigers 
Join Date: Feb 2010
Location: Northern California
Posts: 7,492
Thanks: 18,001
Thanked 15,992 Times in 3,993 Posts
Rep Power: 21474859 |
The show, Miranda.
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09-01-2012, 10:39 PM
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#599 |
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Member
How Do You Identify?:
Not your average babe in the woods. Preferred Pronoun?:
She Relationship Status:
Singular
Join Date: Aug 2012
Location: The edge
Posts: 210
Thanks: 22
Thanked 896 Times in 166 Posts
Rep Power: 12150547 |
Thinking that I could simply waltz into my local Whole Foods late afternoon on the Saturday of Labor Day weekend. That cracked me up.
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09-01-2012, 10:49 PM
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#600 |
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Senior Member
How Do You Identify?:
Fiery, Sassy, Tough As Nails, Femme Tomboy Preferred Pronoun?:
She Relationship Status:
I am your favorite hello and hardest goodbye. Join Date: Nov 2009
Location: NC & CO
Posts: 4,806
Thanks: 4,624
Thanked 12,193 Times in 3,779 Posts
Rep Power: 21474856 |
trying to find a 12 pack of Bud lite for my mechanic buddy that busted his ass fixing my car today... only thing is, he didn't tell me that the towns on the way to his house (in a neighboring county) were "dry"
__________________
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She has been through hell, so believe me when I say, fear her when she looks into a fire and smiles. ~E.Corona~ |
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