What attracts you to Ftms ......

Hominid · 10-28-2012, 10:06 AM

I'm not even going to go there - I have no desire to expand this, and shouldn't have brought it up to begin with. It was not someone sharing his views.

Quote:

Originally Posted by The_Lady_Snow

People coming in and stating their views and having a conversation is not a "SMACK DOWN"

I am unsure of what thread you are talking about since there are so many here on BFP, but I have yet to see anyone *smacking* anyone have folks been taken to task? Yes Do the isms get called out? Yeap. If you are being harrassed or threatened on BFP you should really really have the Moderators take care of that for you

Greyson · 10-28-2012, 10:32 AM

Yes, I am posting this in hopes that all of us may pause and consider our agenda. BTW, I don't think "agenda" is necessarily a bad thing. I just want to know what is really motivating some of my words and actions.

Is my number one priority making this world and in that this community a better and safe place for women?

How do I realize, materialize this goal for women and others if they want help in doing so?

Am I overly invested in being right? Do I want to look the most intelligent? Do I want everyone to notice me? Maybe I do. I ask myself these questions because I am a member of this community that posts often and I do see myself as part of this community. In my mind that makes me responsible to assist in the well being of women, full realization of womens rights, respect in words and actions for women and for the education of "others."

How can I do this? First through my own actions, thoughts, and beliefs. Secondly, with some willingness to put my fear and ego aside. Third take action and try to treat others as I would like to be treated.

Chancie · 10-28-2012, 10:41 AM

I'm in love with a female identified butch, and we are, you know, a monogamous committed couple, but I have been mightily attracted to men who identify as FTM, and the very occasional cisman, but I'm not attracted to every female identified butch, or every man who identifies as FTM, and so on.

Seriously, the threads that make broad sweeping generalizations about groups bug me like crazy. But, I completely get that it's fun to flirt and let potential dates know they think queer femmes are hot stuff, for example.

I live in Western Mass, and in some communities there are huge numbers of lesbians. But, Pete and I perform our own sexy dance, perform in the RuPaul sense, I mean. When she helps me on with my coat, or holds the door for me, or fetches me a ginger ale, we appear to be enacting traditional gender roles.

The difference is, we have no desire to live in the 1950's; I am queer and Pete is a lesbian. We own who we are as people.

I understand that there are folks for whom this is the only place they can be seen for who they genuinely are. I'm thinking of 'the guys', who get to be 'guys', but I am also thinking of femmes who get to strut their stuff without being erased out in the world. But, I don't get to perform feminine the way feminine is portrayed in sitcoms, in the most grotesquely offensive way.

10-28-2012, 10:32 AM	#2
Greyson Infamous Member How Do You Identify?: Transmasculine/Non-Binary Preferred Pronoun?: Hy (Pronounced He) Relationship Status: Married Join Date: Nov 2009 Location: SF Bay Area Posts: 6,589 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 21,132 Thanked 8,146 Times in 2,005 Posts Rep Power: 21474859	Yes, I am posting this in hopes that all of us may pause and consider our agenda. BTW, I don't think "agenda" is necessarily a bad thing. I just want to know what is really motivating some of my words and actions. Is my number one priority making this world and in that this community a better and safe place for women? How do I realize, materialize this goal for women and others if they want help in doing so? Am I overly invested in being right? Do I want to look the most intelligent? Do I want everyone to notice me? Maybe I do. I ask myself these questions because I am a member of this community that posts often and I do see myself as part of this community. In my mind that makes me responsible to assist in the well being of women, full realization of womens rights, respect in words and actions for women and for the education of "others." How can I do this? First through my own actions, thoughts, and beliefs. Secondly, with some willingness to put my fear and ego aside. Third take action and try to treat others as I would like to be treated. __________________ Sometimes you don't realize your own strength until you come face to face with your greatest weakness. - Susan Gale

10-28-2012, 10:41 AM	#3
Chancie Senior Member How Do You Identify?: queer femme-inist Relationship Status: I'm lucky. Join Date: May 2010 Location: Western Mass Posts: 3,774 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 9,518 Thanked 14,540 Times in 2,744 Posts Rep Power: 21474855	I'm in love with a female identified butch, and we are, you know, a monogamous committed couple, but I have been mightily attracted to men who identify as FTM, and the very occasional cisman, but I'm not attracted to every female identified butch, or every man who identifies as FTM, and so on. Seriously, the threads that make broad sweeping generalizations about groups bug me like crazy. But, I completely get that it's fun to flirt and let potential dates know they think queer femmes are hot stuff, for example. I live in Western Mass, and in some communities there are huge numbers of lesbians. But, Pete and I perform our own sexy dance, perform in the RuPaul sense, I mean. When she helps me on with my coat, or holds the door for me, or fetches me a ginger ale, we appear to be enacting traditional gender roles. The difference is, we have no desire to live in the 1950's; I am queer and Pete is a lesbian. We own who we are as people. I understand that there are folks for whom this is the only place they can be seen for who they genuinely are. I'm thinking of 'the guys', who get to be 'guys', but I am also thinking of femmes who get to strut their stuff without being erased out in the world. But, I don't get to perform feminine the way feminine is portrayed in sitcoms, in the most grotesquely offensive way.