Long Distance Relationships

PurpleQuestions84 · 10-31-2012, 07:02 AM

LDRs can work if you both are honest and you have some kind of goal for someone relocating within 2 years

asphaltcowboi · 10-31-2012, 08:30 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by PurpleQuestions84

LDRs can work if you both are honest and you have some kind of goal for someone relocating within 2 years

i argree with you on this.. honest and trust are big ones, to be able to feel secure when your partner lives more then 1/2 a days drive. guess honest and trust work the same or you get one when you have the other. plus cominucation!

Darbonaire · 10-31-2012, 02:15 PM

after 8 years I moved back to VA. I "thought" she would move with me someday after retiring....then she basically said "Hell no, I'll never leave______' So, since I was emotioanlly SO over ______ we tried the LDR thing. I thought "foolishly apparently" that it was working out. I flew her up here every month & then she said..."Nope, I'm looking for someone else. I want someone HERE in _______ full time. Well, she's yet to find anyone from _____...LOL...& I haven't been looking cause I'm not ready....I refuse to just jump into another relationship to fill the void, but then, I'm not afraid or concerned about being alone. I use my alone time to try & better myself..not rush off to find someone else. I have done that in my past & it never works, & quite frankly it's not fair to the other person.

She & I still love each other dearly & always will. I just can't stand living in _______ & she won't leave so, after 10 years the divorce papers got signed & now we're both free.......from my side..it sucks! Such is life.

No, I won't be trying the LDR again thanks. If I couldn't make it work after living with my wife for 8 yrs in...then f*ck it!

I wish others well though..It's nice to hear when things work out...<warm smile>...

Jonathan

scentsofautumn · 11-10-2012, 09:32 PM

This has to be the most soulful meaningful type of relationship. It certainly shows the limits of the heart and mind. Constant care and it often times it's too out of reach. Then there are times when in a different way, you can feel and touch as if that person was with you all along. I did this several times. It's a lot of stamina, determination, will, trust and patience. Depending upon the distance, it's also very expensive if one can't wait endless weeks or months before another visitation. Is it worth it? Personally, I am not so sure...but, willing to go another round.

kittygrrl · 11-10-2012, 10:18 PM

Your wills have to be as strong as iron
Love stronger then the foundations of the earth..
that's rare

Mtn · 11-10-2012, 10:57 PM

It's damned hardwork to do this. It takes a level of commitment and trust different than when you know you can have dinner sometime next week. We use our available tools, chat, text, skype, daily. We talk about the little things, "can you believe so and so did this?" and we talk about the BIG things "teenager gone awry" It doesn't matter what it is we COMMUNICATE. Good days, bad days, we communicate. We also have our rituals, that remind us of our connection. sylvie and I are close to being together for 2 years. We have goals and an abundant amount of patience. We laugh and cry together. We are PRESENT. LDR's aren't for the feint of heart. Being patient enough to let life do it's thing is so important. I am invested in our life together and every step we take towards that. You never KNOW until you TRY.

rustedrims · 11-27-2012, 02:17 PM

I can see it is going to be tough but i am willing to work at this.The trust is already there and that is a big deal to us both.I feel like a kid on Christmas Eve waiting for the phone to ring knowing the conversation will bring laughs and things to think about.She is worth the time and effort and so am I.

Greco · 11-28-2012, 02:54 PM

Not for me.

Greco

10-31-2012, 07:02 AM	#1
PurpleQuestions84 Junior Member How Do You Identify?: Super Girly Preferred Pronoun?: Miss.Lady ;) Relationship Status: Single Join Date: Oct 2012 Location: So.cal U.S.A Posts: 62 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 53 Thanked 153 Times in 43 Posts Rep Power: 1365539	LDRs can work if you both are honest and you have some kind of goal for someone relocating within 2 years __________________ It takes courage to grow up and become who you really are. ~e.e. cummings "if you end up a life you never wanted because u listened to your parents, your priest, your friends, and your spouse, you deserve it." PurpleQuestions84 AKA Barbie Dyke

10-31-2012, 02:15 PM	#3
Darbonaire Timed Out How Do You Identify?: MALE Preferred Pronoun?: He Relationship Status: Working on myself, thank you Join Date: Jul 2011 Location: Virginia Posts: 186 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 343 Thanked 552 Times in 145 Posts Rep Power: 0	I was married for 10 years after 8 years I moved back to VA. I "thought" she would move with me someday after retiring....then she basically said "Hell no, I'll never leave______' So, since I was emotioanlly SO over ______ we tried the LDR thing. I thought "foolishly apparently" that it was working out. I flew her up here every month & then she said..."Nope, I'm looking for someone else. I want someone HERE in _______ full time. Well, she's yet to find anyone from _____...LOL...& I haven't been looking cause I'm not ready....I refuse to just jump into another relationship to fill the void, but then, I'm not afraid or concerned about being alone. I use my alone time to try & better myself..not rush off to find someone else. I have done that in my past & it never works, & quite frankly it's not fair to the other person. She & I still love each other dearly & always will. I just can't stand living in _______ & she won't leave so, after 10 years the divorce papers got signed & now we're both free.......from my side..it sucks! Such is life. No, I won't be trying the LDR again thanks. If I couldn't make it work after living with my wife for 8 yrs in...then f*ck it! I wish others well though..It's nice to hear when things work out...<warm smile>... Jonathan

11-10-2012, 09:32 PM	#4
scentsofautumn Junior Member How Do You Identify?: Stone Butch Relationship Status: single Join Date: Jan 2010 Location: NY State Posts: 9 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 1 Thanked 15 Times in 5 Posts Rep Power: 0	Hmmmm.... This has to be the most soulful meaningful type of relationship. It certainly shows the limits of the heart and mind. Constant care and it often times it's too out of reach. Then there are times when in a different way, you can feel and touch as if that person was with you all along. I did this several times. It's a lot of stamina, determination, will, trust and patience. Depending upon the distance, it's also very expensive if one can't wait endless weeks or months before another visitation. Is it worth it? Personally, I am not so sure...but, willing to go another round.

11-10-2012, 10:18 PM	#5
kittygrrl Infamous Member How Do You Identify?: witchy Preferred Pronoun?: Fae Relationship Status: just for fun Join Date: Nov 2009 Location: near the wild mushrooms Posts: 9,407 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 21,611 Thanked 21,980 Times in 7,094 Posts Rep Power: 21474861	LDR Your wills have to be as strong as iron Love stronger then the foundations of the earth.. that's rare __________________ "We're nine meals from anarchy"" Lewis

11-10-2012, 10:57 PM	#6
Mtn Member How Do You Identify?: Stone butch, daddy type Relationship Status: sylvie calls me her studmuffin Join Date: Nov 2009 Location: OR Posts: 691 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 2,005 Thanked 3,834 Times in 617 Posts Rep Power: 21474852	It's damned hardwork to do this. It takes a level of commitment and trust different than when you know you can have dinner sometime next week. We use our available tools, chat, text, skype, daily. We talk about the little things, "can you believe so and so did this?" and we talk about the BIG things "teenager gone awry" It doesn't matter what it is we COMMUNICATE. Good days, bad days, we communicate. We also have our rituals, that remind us of our connection. sylvie and I are close to being together for 2 years. We have goals and an abundant amount of patience. We laugh and cry together. We are PRESENT. LDR's aren't for the feint of heart. Being patient enough to let life do it's thing is so important. I am invested in our life together and every step we take towards that. You never KNOW until you TRY. __________________ If you don't sleep in my bed, or sign my paycheck, your opinion probably does not matter to me...

11-27-2012, 02:17 PM	#7
rustedrims Member How Do You Identify?: Butch Preferred Pronoun?: she/her Join Date: Mar 2011 Location: Northern Ohio close to Lake Erie and ice-cream places Posts: 444 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 3,123 Thanked 2,553 Times in 367 Posts Rep Power: 21474851	LDR I can see it is going to be tough but i am willing to work at this.The trust is already there and that is a big deal to us both.I feel like a kid on Christmas Eve waiting for the phone to ring knowing the conversation will bring laughs and things to think about.She is worth the time and effort and so am I. __________________ I don't want to be perfect because if I was then I will loose the ability to learn.

11-28-2012, 02:54 PM	#8
Greco Senior Member How Do You Identify?: GNC, not Trans, REAL. TIME. ONLY. Preferred Pronoun?: REAL. TIME. ONLY. Relationship Status: REAL. TIME. ONLY. Join Date: Apr 2010 Location: In a good life. Posts: 3,200 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 11,160 Thanked 6,616 Times in 2,285 Posts Rep Power: 0	LDR Not for me. Greco