Attraction = physical, mental, emotional...

moxie · 03-21-2010, 09:54 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Mister Bent

Without a brilliant, engaging, provocative mind, there is nothing for me.

The rest would be irrelevant.

I agree. If someone cannot stimulate me intellectually then it is pointless for me.

Looks are important and I have aspects I am attracted to like butch/FtM, smells good, wears great shoes...but it's "everything else" about the person tends to make them more attractive to me. It can also make someone less attractive. If you don't have similar values like kindness, politeness, respect, honesty and the all-important traits like a witty, somewhat dry sense of humour, knows how government works (odd I know), cares about what is going on in their neighborhood and all over the world, and treats others how they would expect to be treated then it won't work.

I have met some really gorgeous people on the outside that aren't so pleasant on the inside and it ruins everything.

Soft*Silver · 03-21-2010, 10:03 AM

I really thought more on this and I think that something that is very attractive to me is if someone really knows how to date. I dont mean fall in love and sweep me off my feet. If they tried that at this point in my life I would run in the opposite direction! But I mean, the build up, the carry through, the Presence of Self or Thought. I have given so much of that to others...I really want someone who can give it back to me, without coaxing or teaching. I am past needing to be a teacher. I want a learned Soul who can dance the slowest sweetest longest dance of the evening with me....that moment of warmth and musk, of tenderness and heat, of a soft brush of their face on mine, their hand right "there" in the curve of my back that responds and yet he has never ....

yes...someone who engages fully in the dance...with me...

that the kind of dating I am looking for....(and yes you can so do that long distance...)

Rockinonahigh · 03-21-2010, 10:44 AM

When I meet someone either in person or on the phone the way they cary on the conversation and tone of voice along with eye contact(if in person) is the first thing that I see.Dose she really seem intrested in me or is she talking around me..u would be surprised how many talk at me and not to me.Beleave me im definatly checking them out to see how genuine they are.There are players out in the world and some how I attract them when I dont want to..even when the game is just that, fun and games,for me I have long since tired of them.
I probly will fall out if I met a person who was really into life,wants to really engage in an adult relationship,stimulate my mind,body and soul.Really know how to date without the uhaul reveing up in the back parking lot.Someone mentioned earler about kissing...a definate A+ for me,being pasionate about life and still know how to play,laugh and have fun.As for baggage ..well we all have some we deal with so I figure if we are really into each other we will work them out some how.

Soft*Silver · 03-21-2010, 10:52 AM

[QUOTE=puregrrl;70895.

I have met some really gorgeous people on the outside that aren't so pleasant on the inside and it ruins everything.[/QUOTE]

I have dated some incredibly handsome people. Some were just as beautiful inside as they were outside. Some werent. Some were just hurting and it darkened their insides. I also dated plain folks too who were so luminisce inwardly...they lit up when they smiled, which was often. Looks last, with me, a millisecond. I want to stand energy to energy and see if we can feel the connection...

Rockinonahigh · 03-21-2010, 10:58 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by softness

I have dated some incredibly handsome people. Some were just as beautiful inside as they were outside. Some werent. Some were just hurting and it darkened their insides. I also dated plain folks too who were so luminisce inwardly...they lit up when they smiled, which was often. Looks last, with me, a millisecond. I want to stand energy to energy and see if we can feel the connection...

Girl u hit the nail right on the head...couldnt have said it better.

Soft*Silver · 03-21-2010, 11:01 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Rockinonahigh

Girl u hit the nail right on the head...couldnt have said it better.

smiling warmly. Thank you, Rocky...

Rockinonahigh · 03-21-2010, 12:16 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by softness

smiling warmly. Thank you, Rocky...

The pleaure is all mine...

Soft*Silver · 03-21-2010, 12:21 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Rockinonahigh

The pleaure is all mine...

my eyes crinkle at the sides as I smile, reading this....

Rockinonahigh · 03-21-2010, 12:38 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by softness

my eyes crinkle at the sides as I smile, reading this....

Mine too

..

Rockinonahigh · 03-21-2010, 12:32 PM

I read your post and am wondering,just for clairafacation(sp?),how cold I create a diffrent me to attract someone??

Lose more weight to be healther....i'm doing that already,to be shure loseing weight has its own scedual.

Be more finacialy stable...I already own near all I have free and clear.
I have very fue bills to pay just utilities and car inshurance with $ left over..do I need have more $$.Oh shure, I could go back to work cause retirement is boreing..besides I miss the daily grind.

Should I be more handsome,dye my grey hair,work out harder so I can bulk up more.

So if I change who I am on the outside, how will it make me diffrent cause if I did a total redo..I wouldnt be the person I really am and it took me a long time to get to where I am.

03-21-2010, 10:03 AM	#2
SoftSilver Infamous Member How Do You Identify?: femme Preferred Pronoun?: she Relationship Status: Married Join Date: Nov 2009 Location: rose cottage Posts: 5,594 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 8,948 Thanked 15,896 Times in 4,064 Posts Rep Power*: 21474858	I really thought more on this and I think that something that is very attractive to me is if someone really knows how to date. I dont mean fall in love and sweep me off my feet. If they tried that at this point in my life I would run in the opposite direction! But I mean, the build up, the carry through, the Presence of Self or Thought. I have given so much of that to others...I really want someone who can give it back to me, without coaxing or teaching. I am past needing to be a teacher. I want a learned Soul who can dance the slowest sweetest longest dance of the evening with me....that moment of warmth and musk, of tenderness and heat, of a soft brush of their face on mine, their hand right "there" in the curve of my back that responds and yet he has never .... yes...someone who engages fully in the dance...with me... that the kind of dating I am looking for....(and yes you can so do that long distance...) __________________ Pole bachit, a lis chuye. The field sees, the forest hears

03-21-2010, 10:52 AM	#4
SoftSilver Infamous Member How Do You Identify?: femme Preferred Pronoun?: she Relationship Status: Married Join Date: Nov 2009 Location: rose cottage Posts: 5,594 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 8,948 Thanked 15,896 Times in 4,064 Posts Rep Power*: 21474858	[QUOTE=puregrrl;70895. I have met some really gorgeous people on the outside that aren't so pleasant on the inside and it ruins everything.[/QUOTE] I have dated some incredibly handsome people. Some were just as beautiful inside as they were outside. Some werent. Some were just hurting and it darkened their insides. I also dated plain folks too who were so luminisce inwardly...they lit up when they smiled, which was often. Looks last, with me, a millisecond. I want to stand energy to energy and see if we can feel the connection... __________________ Pole bachit, a lis chuye. The field sees, the forest hears

03-21-2010, 12:32 PM	#10
Rockinonahigh Senior Member How Do You Identify?: stone butch Preferred Pronoun?: makes no diffrence,I know who I am. Relationship Status: single,maybe looking if the right person comes along. Join Date: Dec 2009 Location: shreveport,Louisiana Posts: 4,907 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 4,682 Thanked 14,933 Times in 3,938 Posts Rep Power: 21474857	Key I read your post and am wondering,just for clairafacation(sp?),how cold I create a diffrent me to attract someone?? Lose more weight to be healther....i'm doing that already,to be shure loseing weight has its own scedual. Be more finacialy stable...I already own near all I have free and clear. I have very fue bills to pay just utilities and car inshurance with $ left over..do I need have more $$.Oh shure, I could go back to work cause retirement is boreing..besides I miss the daily grind. Should I be more handsome,dye my grey hair,work out harder so I can bulk up more. So if I change who I am on the outside, how will it make me diffrent cause if I did a total redo..I wouldnt be the person I really am and it took me a long time to get to where I am.

03-21-2010, 10:44 AM	#3
Rockinonahigh Senior Member How Do You Identify?: stone butch Preferred Pronoun?: makes no diffrence,I know who I am. Relationship Status: single,maybe looking if the right person comes along. Join Date: Dec 2009 Location: shreveport,Louisiana Posts: 4,907 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 4,682 Thanked 14,933 Times in 3,938 Posts Rep Power: 21474857	When I meet someone either in person or on the phone the way they cary on the conversation and tone of voice along with eye contact(if in person) is the first thing that I see.Dose she really seem intrested in me or is she talking around me..u would be surprised how many talk at me and not to me.Beleave me im definatly checking them out to see how genuine they are.There are players out in the world and some how I attract them when I dont want to..even when the game is just that, fun and games,for me I have long since tired of them. I probly will fall out if I met a person who was really into life,wants to really engage in an adult relationship,stimulate my mind,body and soul.Really know how to date without the uhaul reveing up in the back parking lot.Someone mentioned earler about kissing...a definate A+ for me,being pasionate about life and still know how to play,laugh and have fun.As for baggage ..well we all have some we deal with so I figure if we are really into each other we will work them out some how.