Talkin' 'bout love...

Rockinonahigh · 03-24-2010, 03:50 PM

This love you speak of,it is the thing we all go nuts after,try so hard to hold on to only to fall flat when its gone...then we do it alllllllll over again.Hummmm I think I will just sit and read cause this could very intresting.

Ginger · 04-15-2012, 10:28 AM

I trust a person's actions more than her words.

Sometimes people lie to themselves, and from that place, lie to their partner. They don't mean to do so—but it happens. Meanwhile, their actions tell the truth.

I have done this, too.

We humans struggle.

Turtle · 04-15-2012, 11:50 AM

I ran into a good old friend yesterday. I hadn't seen him for about 8 years. I have thought of him often over time. I love him, deeply. I think of him and feel him as what I call a "Soul buddy." We "get" each other, we feel each other, and we are VERY comfortable with each other. Do we want to have sex, no. Would I give him a kidney...probably.

In dating, I think there can be this initial electricity in being the focus of someone's attention that can be sexy and mood elevating and great fun...and it can deepen into a lasting relationship, but often doesn't.

For me, it's whether or not I feel like the other person has touched my soul that determines whether or not I call it and feel it as love. Does that soul touch always involve kidney donation - no. I'll still call it love, though. Does that soultouch mean I want to marry them - no. Can it happen with someone I meet in the course of my day at work - yes. Will I think of that person with love in my heart - yes.

For me, I love freely with my heart. For me, in my primary settled down coming home to you every night relationship I want and need a deep soulfelt love, trust, depth, caring, and responsibility in thought and action.

The original questions of "how do I know it's love?" - for me, it's the touch of my soul.

And "what do we fall into?" - I think that the "fall in love" thing is the high energy of a new exciting focus mixed in with sexual energy. I believe it is possible to keep that feeling alive even if that "newness" lasts for 35 years.

LaneyDoll · 04-23-2012, 07:37 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Turtle

The original questions of "how do I know it's love?" - for me, it's the touch of my soul.

And "what do we fall into?" - I think that the "fall in love" thing is the high energy of a new exciting focus mixed in with sexual energy. I believe it is possible to keep that feeling alive even if that "newness" lasts for 35 years.

How do I know it is love? When I strive to be the person that "they" see. When they see kindness and warmth so I try to be kinder and warmer. When they see happiness so it spills over from me. When they see everything I want to be so I want to be that, even more.

SaltyButch · 04-26-2012, 06:54 PM

Ahh the age old question, I agree with most of the posts so far but would like to elaborate a little. The "falling" is in my opinion the transition of us absorbing and feeling the energy of the other person and the emotions they create within us, with the end result being what we know as love. The sustaining of that love is the continual growing we do with and without that person and the experiences we share, which is why we can love in varying degrees. The ultimate is to love and be "in love" with someone, to me that encompasses the feeling we emote in each and the passion is undeniable. My experience has been that the latter is the hardest to attain but when you do the joy is unmistakeable and for me usually starts at a slow burn and ends up as a raging fire.

girl_dee · 04-26-2012, 07:07 PM

IslandScout made a very good good point.

macele · 04-15-2012, 11:50 AM

a partner is sometimes about companionship. being in love is not a part of the equation. but that just depends on where 2 people are in their lives. example: amelia earhart and george putnam had a pre-marital aggreement. it seems more like companionship rather than being in love. for sure by amelia. http://www.lib.purdue.edu/spcol/aearhart/marriage.php

being in love is to want to know everything there is about the other person. wanting to give them pleasure in all directions of their lives. just can't seem to get enough.

people change. change isn't always a bad thing. i've never stopped loving anyone. the being in love part changed. i'm not a fan of the pharse "falling out of love".

i adore the thought of a soulmate. i don't think i should be fixated on one. i think i can have more than one in my lifetime. does every one find a soulmate?

i know that i need to really focus on communication. i don't do that well. if two people really get to know selves and share that knowing in a communicative way, ... most likely the lifetime relationship will be found.

i've often wondered, does our own hearts deceive us? it's possible. it could be said that the deception is not by the heart, but instead, things such as lust. and i tend to go with my heart doesn't ask me for permission to love. so that thing i call heart, in my opinion, can absolutely do whatever it wants.

03-24-2010, 03:50 PM	#1
Rockinonahigh Senior Member How Do You Identify?: stone butch Preferred Pronoun?: makes no diffrence,I know who I am. Relationship Status: single,maybe looking if the right person comes along. Join Date: Dec 2009 Location: shreveport,Louisiana Posts: 4,907 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 4,682 Thanked 14,933 Times in 3,938 Posts Rep Power: 21474856	This love you speak of,it is the thing we all go nuts after,try so hard to hold on to only to fall flat when its gone...then we do it alllllllll over again.Hummmm I think I will just sit and read cause this could very intresting.

04-15-2012, 10:28 AM	#2
Ginger Senior Member How Do You Identify?: Femme lesbian Join Date: Mar 2012 Location: East coast Posts: 2,416 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 5,829 Thanked 12,295 Times in 2,057 Posts Rep Power: 21474852	I trust a person's actions more than her words. Sometimes people lie to themselves, and from that place, lie to their partner. They don't mean to do so—but it happens. Meanwhile, their actions tell the truth. I have done this, too. We humans struggle.

04-15-2012, 11:50 AM	#3
Turtle Senior Member How Do You Identify?: A mixity Preferred Pronoun?: whatever Relationship Status: chillin Join Date: Aug 2010 Location: in a really really cute little place Posts: 2,144 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 2,442 Thanked 4,529 Times in 1,220 Posts Rep Power: 21474854	I ran into a good old friend yesterday. I hadn't seen him for about 8 years. I have thought of him often over time. I love him, deeply. I think of him and feel him as what I call a "Soul buddy." We "get" each other, we feel each other, and we are VERY comfortable with each other. Do we want to have sex, no. Would I give him a kidney...probably. In dating, I think there can be this initial electricity in being the focus of someone's attention that can be sexy and mood elevating and great fun...and it can deepen into a lasting relationship, but often doesn't. For me, it's whether or not I feel like the other person has touched my soul that determines whether or not I call it and feel it as love. Does that soul touch always involve kidney donation - no. I'll still call it love, though. Does that soultouch mean I want to marry them - no. Can it happen with someone I meet in the course of my day at work - yes. Will I think of that person with love in my heart - yes. For me, I love freely with my heart. For me, in my primary settled down coming home to you every night relationship I want and need a deep soulfelt love, trust, depth, caring, and responsibility in thought and action. The original questions of "how do I know it's love?" - for me, it's the touch of my soul. And "what do we fall into?" - I think that the "fall in love" thing is the high energy of a new exciting focus mixed in with sexual energy. I believe it is possible to keep that feeling alive even if that "newness" lasts for 35 years.

04-26-2012, 06:54 PM	#5
SaltyButch Member How Do You Identify?: Old School Butch Preferred Pronoun?: he/she/hey you..... Relationship Status: open to the possibilities Tournaments Won: 5 Join Date: Mar 2010 Location: mississauga ontario canada Posts: 345 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 432 Thanked 1,633 Times in 301 Posts Rep Power: 21474852	Ahh the age old question, I agree with most of the posts so far but would like to elaborate a little. The "falling" is in my opinion the transition of us absorbing and feeling the energy of the other person and the emotions they create within us, with the end result being what we know as love. The sustaining of that love is the continual growing we do with and without that person and the experiences we share, which is why we can love in varying degrees. The ultimate is to love and be "in love" with someone, to me that encompasses the feeling we emote in each and the passion is undeniable. My experience has been that the latter is the hardest to attain but when you do the joy is unmistakeable and for me usually starts at a slow burn and ends up as a raging fire.

04-26-2012, 07:07 PM	#6
girl_dee Practically Lives Here How Do You Identify?: Femme Preferred Pronoun?: dee Relationship Status: Hitched up Join Date: Nov 2009 Location: Livin’ the Dream Posts: 24,079 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 30,560 Thanked 54,829 Times in 13,908 Posts Rep Power: 21474873	IslandScout made a very good good point.

04-15-2012, 11:50 AM	#7
macele Member How Do You Identify?: a bold-assed maximus Preferred Pronoun?: she Join Date: Sep 2011 Location: mississippi Posts: 1,066 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 3,178 Thanked 3,230 Times in 847 Posts Rep Power: 21474851	a partner is sometimes about companionship. being in love is not a part of the equation. but that just depends on where 2 people are in their lives. example: amelia earhart and george putnam had a pre-marital aggreement. it seems more like companionship rather than being in love. for sure by amelia. http://www.lib.purdue.edu/spcol/aearhart/marriage.php being in love is to want to know everything there is about the other person. wanting to give them pleasure in all directions of their lives. just can't seem to get enough. people change. change isn't always a bad thing. i've never stopped loving anyone. the being in love part changed. i'm not a fan of the pharse "falling out of love". i adore the thought of a soulmate. i don't think i should be fixated on one. i think i can have more than one in my lifetime. does every one find a soulmate? i know that i need to really focus on communication. i don't do that well. if two people really get to know selves and share that knowing in a communicative way, ... most likely the lifetime relationship will be found. i've often wondered, does our own hearts deceive us? it's possible. it could be said that the deception is not by the heart, but instead, things such as lust. and i tend to go with my heart doesn't ask me for permission to love. so that thing i call heart, in my opinion, can absolutely do whatever it wants.