Infidelity

Martina · 03-31-2010, 07:20 PM

It's misogynistic IN THE EXTREME to say that women are given a pass on infidelity. IN THE EXTREME. It shouldn't be tolerated here. It's not civilized conversation. Women have been killed and put in mental institutions for infidelity. In the subculture i come from, it's assumed that men will cheat. It's a remarkable man who doesn't. If a woman cheats, everyone is concerned that her husband or boyfriend might kill her and whoever she slept with.

In the past it's been considered justifiable to kill a woman for infidelity. It still is in some places. It's also been an excuse to take children away from women.

There is long history of violence associated with this issue.

i cannot believe anyone would assert that women are given a pass on this. i do not think any assertion that they are is an innocent one.

SuperFemme · 03-31-2010, 07:43 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Martina

It's misogynistic IN THE EXTREME to say that women are given a pass on infidelity. IN THE EXTREME. It shouldn't be tolerated here. It's not civilized conversation. Women have been killed and put in mental institutions for infidelity. In the subculture i come from, it's assumed that men will cheat. It's a remarkable man who doesn't. If a woman cheats, everyone is concerned that her husband or boyfriend might kill her and whoever she slept with.

In the past it's been considered justifiable to kill a woman for infidelity. It still is in some places. It's also been an excuse to take children away from women.

There is long history of violence associated with this issue.

i cannot believe anyone would assert that women are given a pass on this. i do not think any assertion that they are is an innocent one.

If being publicly happy about your relationship is a red flag, then we've lost all hope.

It is also beyond ridiculous to believe that women are given a pass.

The_Lady_Snow · 03-31-2010, 07:47 PM

What I do not understand is......

Why the hell are we surprised when a celebrity marriage goes down the tubes?

I mean come on really folks, they get married what every 6 to 14 months, on the bf.dom people are in love and pretend married what every 2 to 7 months?

It's no different, for some unknown fucked up reason, we love to stick our noses in shit, no matter how bad it smells....

Martina · 03-31-2010, 07:47 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by SuperFemme

If being publicly happy about your relationship is a red flag, then we've lost all hope.

i missed that part. i hope we can all be publicly happy about our relationships.

Gemme · 03-31-2010, 07:57 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Kobi

When I started this thread, I was just curious how people view fidelity and how people have reacted to infidelity in their own lives.

This thread's topic became very relavent to me, as of last night. Julie mentioned collateral damage. Well, insert my picture and a couple others in the dictionary for that, because that's where I'm at now.

How do people react? Let's see....there was screaming and shouting and crying....me trying to soothe the dogs who were going crazy because they don't like fighting....something got slammed into the wall and the 30 pound vacuum cleaner was hauled upstairs....a friend from work was called in to help diffuse the situation and/or provide a witness....threats of calling the other's command and potentially ending what has been a prestigious career thus far....me turning the TV up and holding the dogs close because if I go upstairs I would be all up in other people's Koolaid....one friend standing in stony silence and the other crying so hard she could hardly breathe...the hapless 'witness' awkwardly standing in the corner rubbing his head and taking off and putting on his hat over and over again....and now, less than 24 hours after it began, I don't know whether I and our other housemate need to start looking for another place to live since a realtor was at the house this morning estimating its value, the offending party has been kicked out and other party is still pushing at the bit to go to his command, not realizing the fallout of that decision not only for him, but for her as well.

Yeah, it kinda looks like that.

Boots13 · 03-31-2010, 08:55 PM

Infidelity is narcissism at its prime
it is gluttony beyond any sense of the word
it is an intentional chaotic act of power
and a fractal act of cowardice by a pig unable to comprehend the
incalculable effects of self absorption.
it is unforgivable.

I felt for you Softness.
I, too, lost my home when I walked away. A barn and kennels that I built, fields that I fenced, and a house that overlooked a lake and valley. I sold it for a song and walked away suffering a huge financial and emotional loss after discovering the affair. No counseling, no negotiation, no forgiveness, nothing. Done.

I came to understand that losing my home hurt more than the affair. The person I shared it with was someone I ultimately didn't know, nor did I care to. Retrospect is so clear.

It happened to me twice.

I also swore that nobody. NOBODY would hold sway over my emotions. If I wouldn't dive headfirst into emotions then it wasn't time to do anything but enjoy friends and spend time with family. And when I was ready I opened up , completely, again.

I've never looked back, other than to clearly define the act of infidelity as nothing but a self-absorbed act of cowardice and destruction.

By the way, can you tell I have ZERO tolerance.

Soft*Silver · 04-01-2010, 12:21 AM

[QUOTE=Boots13;76696]
I came to understand that losing my home hurt more than the affair. The person I shared it with was someone I ultimately didn't know, nor did I care to. Retrospect is so clear. QUOTE]

Oh a big AMEN to this! I can do without a cheating partner. I can date and find another one...but I cant recapture my childhood farm. I lost it and my dream of raising horses. I had it all there, in the cup of my hands, but because I wasn't "available" to him because I was in so much pain over a broken dislocated shoulder, he felt it justified him going outside of our marraige.

Never again will I let go of a house for a partner. Never again will I let someone give me then take away a home. I own my own home now, free and clear. I am also living contently single....

Dude · 04-01-2010, 09:08 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Jet

I have cheated and i have been cheated on, so I don't do relationships anymore. The thing about that scum ass Jesse James is that he was never man enough to handle her success. He's weak enough to act out being shown up by her limelight and tremendous success. She's gorgeous; brilliant, level and has million things going for her....any man who's a real man would die for that and he's nothing but a sleaze ass fuckin' baby who was nothing without her. Prick. My .02

looks like Sandra found her "real man" and she doesn't even know it yet

maybe you can photo shop the two of you in the alps or something?

hoping the sig line pic gets quoted, so it is clear what I'm referring to....
sigh....no it didnt....holy hell with spam on top

"real men" don't like quiche anyways

plus I always spell virile ...viral
damn it

03-31-2010, 07:47 PM	#3
The_Lady_Snow MILLION $$$ PUSSY How Do You Identify?: Kinky, Raw, Perverted, Uber Queer Alpha Femme Preferred Pronoun?: Iconic Ms. Relationship Status: Keeper of 3, only one has the map to my freckles Join Date: Nov 2009 Location: La Reina del Sur Posts: 22,488 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 32,231 Thanked 80,080 Times in 15,669 Posts Rep Power: 21474874	What I do not understand is...... Why the hell are we surprised when a celebrity marriage goes down the tubes? I mean come on really folks, they get married what every 6 to 14 months, on the bf.dom people are in love and pretend married what every 2 to 7 months? It's no different, for some unknown fucked up reason, we love to stick our noses in shit, no matter how bad it smells.... __________________ "If you’re going to play these dirty games of ours, then you might as well indulge completely. It’s all about turning back into an animal and that’s the beauty of it. Place your guilt on the sidewalk and take a blow torch to it (guilt is usually worthless anyway). Be perverted, be filthy, do things that mannered people shouldn’t do. If you’re going to be gross then go for it and don’t wimp out."---Master Aiden

03-31-2010, 08:55 PM	#6
Boots13 Member How Do You Identify?: Butch Preferred Pronoun?: She Relationship Status: No Join Date: Nov 2009 Location: PNW Posts: 823 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 1,387 Thanked 2,313 Times in 428 Posts Rep Power: 21474852	unforgivable Infidelity is narcissism at its prime it is gluttony beyond any sense of the word it is an intentional chaotic act of power and a fractal act of cowardice by a pig unable to comprehend the incalculable effects of self absorption. it is unforgivable. I felt for you Softness. I, too, lost my home when I walked away. A barn and kennels that I built, fields that I fenced, and a house that overlooked a lake and valley. I sold it for a song and walked away suffering a huge financial and emotional loss after discovering the affair. No counseling, no negotiation, no forgiveness, nothing. Done. I came to understand that losing my home hurt more than the affair. The person I shared it with was someone I ultimately didn't know, nor did I care to. Retrospect is so clear. It happened to me twice. I also swore that nobody. NOBODY would hold sway over my emotions. If I wouldn't dive headfirst into emotions then it wasn't time to do anything but enjoy friends and spend time with family. And when I was ready I opened up , completely, again. I've never looked back, other than to clearly define the act of infidelity as nothing but a self-absorbed act of cowardice and destruction. By the way, can you tell I have ZERO tolerance.

04-01-2010, 12:21 AM	#7
SoftSilver Infamous Member How Do You Identify?: femme Preferred Pronoun?: she Relationship Status: Married Join Date: Nov 2009 Location: rose cottage Posts: 5,592 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 8,948 Thanked 15,906 Times in 4,062 Posts Rep Power*: 21474857	[QUOTE=Boots13;76696] I came to understand that losing my home hurt more than the affair. The person I shared it with was someone I ultimately didn't know, nor did I care to. Retrospect is so clear. QUOTE] Oh a big AMEN to this! I can do without a cheating partner. I can date and find another one...but I cant recapture my childhood farm. I lost it and my dream of raising horses. I had it all there, in the cup of my hands, but because I wasn't "available" to him because I was in so much pain over a broken dislocated shoulder, he felt it justified him going outside of our marraige. Never again will I let go of a house for a partner. Never again will I let someone give me then take away a home. I own my own home now, free and clear. I am also living contently single.... __________________ Pole bachit, a lis chuye. The field sees, the forest hears

03-31-2010, 07:20 PM	#1
Martina Senior Member How Do You Identify?: * Join Date: Feb 2010 Location: * Posts: 4,999 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 13,409 Thanked 18,286 Times in 4,167 Posts Rep Power: 21474854	It's misogynistic IN THE EXTREME to say that women are given a pass on infidelity. IN THE EXTREME. It shouldn't be tolerated here. It's not civilized conversation. Women have been killed and put in mental institutions for infidelity. In the subculture i come from, it's assumed that men will cheat. It's a remarkable man who doesn't. If a woman cheats, everyone is concerned that her husband or boyfriend might kill her and whoever she slept with. In the past it's been considered justifiable to kill a woman for infidelity. It still is in some places. It's also been an excuse to take children away from women. There is long history of violence associated with this issue. i cannot believe anyone would assert that women are given a pass on this. i do not think any assertion that they are is an innocent one.