what NOT to do in a relationship.......

little_ms_sunshyne · 03-17-2013, 12:39 PM

Don't take each other for granted

girl_dee · 03-17-2013, 12:44 PM

don't forget what that first week was like....

Ascot · 03-17-2013, 01:00 PM

Don't be a douche. It's pretty basic.

Sweet Bliss · 03-20-2013, 08:54 AM

When you see a bill in your name for a magazine, don't assume the woman who loves you is "using your name to get stuff".... Because it may just mean that you got to the mail before she did.... and now your gift is spoiled by your ugly remark.

Jumping to conclusions is like jumping off a cliff, it's not gonna end pretty.

Sweet Bliss · 03-20-2013, 02:03 PM

Refrain from saying 'all my exes.........' if you feel hurt, get some help. Assuming your current love is 'just like' your exes does both of you an injustice. It sets the stage for animosity.

Ascot · 03-20-2013, 02:15 PM

For the love of God, please don't be clingy or needy. I get that you have needs. We all have needs. Express them as an adult, sans whingeing.

CA_BabyCakes · 03-20-2013, 02:23 PM

Dont assume that everyone has the same do's and don't as you do.

What one assume to be a rule breaker another might see as adorable.

Admin · 03-20-2013, 07:59 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by AscotButch

Don't be a douche. It's pretty basic.

Ascot-

This post was reported for being problematic.

Here's the thing, this is supposed to be woman-positive space and I'd like to think we can do a little deeper digging around language that has been used in ways that don't honor women.

I know that "douche bag" is popular vernacular right now but how about a word like "asshat" or "dumbass"? Those words don't hold the same kind of negativity in women's space that calling someone a "douche", a "twat", a "bitch", a "cunt", a "whore", a "slut", a "tampon", and "insert other words that are not woman positive unless consented to" tend to hold.

Thanks,
Admin

FeminineAllure · 03-20-2013, 09:14 PM

You are even in a relationship and find out what NOT to do...

Are you *available* to put the time into having and nurturing one?

Will it be or become one of your *priorities* to be in one?

LDR are not easy. Think long and hard if you are capable of *sustaining* one BEFORE you start having feelings for that awesome femme or butch. <that look out the window together on the phone in the morning and one has 6 feet of snow and the other is watching seagulls flying around and its 75 degrees outside at 8am and 11am for the other.> It took 3 hours to shovel and clean the car off

This is where the "I wish you were here" begins. For the record I am not against LDR I have seen plenty work out wonderfully.

And the last one...
ARE YOU TRULY AVAILABLE mentally,emotionally, physically and spiritually TO EVEN BE IN A RELATIONSHIP???
What does *single* mean to you?
The time spent reflecting after your relationship has ended is when you *truly* learn what not to do in your next relationship. It hurts but its a gift

MysticOceansFL · 03-20-2013, 09:53 PM

Simply don't assume.

TheMerryFairy · 03-20-2013, 10:03 PM

Don't ignore the other persons needs.

03-17-2013, 01:00 PM	#3
Ascot Member How Do You Identify?: Preppy Butch artist Relationship Status: Riding solo Join Date: Aug 2012 Location: North of the Emerald City Posts: 1,135 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 179 Thanked 2,487 Times in 549 Posts Rep Power: 21474851	Don't be a douche. It's pretty basic. __________________ Now, if I could just find a way to get paid for what I can do with my tongue and a cherry stem.

03-20-2013, 08:54 AM	#4
Sweet Bliss Senior Member How Do You Identify?: I Am Preferred Pronoun?: she Relationship Status: solo Join Date: Mar 2010 Location: the Beach, Pacific side Posts: 4,160 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 5,354 Thanked 7,268 Times in 2,159 Posts Rep Power: 21474856	more don'ts When you see a bill in your name for a magazine, don't assume the woman who loves you is "using your name to get stuff".... Because it may just mean that you got to the mail before she did.... and now your gift is spoiled by your ugly remark. Jumping to conclusions is like jumping off a cliff, it's not gonna end pretty.

03-20-2013, 02:15 PM	#6
Ascot Member How Do You Identify?: Preppy Butch artist Relationship Status: Riding solo Join Date: Aug 2012 Location: North of the Emerald City Posts: 1,135 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 179 Thanked 2,487 Times in 549 Posts Rep Power: 21474851	For the love of God, please don't be clingy or needy. I get that you have needs. We all have needs. Express them as an adult, sans whingeing. __________________ Now, if I could just find a way to get paid for what I can do with my tongue and a cherry stem.

03-20-2013, 09:14 PM	#9
FeminineAllure Member How Do You Identify?: Female Preferred Pronoun?: she Relationship Status: My rainbow is way overdue Join Date: Nov 2009 Location: PA Posts: 1,145 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 1,659 Thanked 2,026 Times in 555 Posts Rep Power: 21474854	Before... You are even in a relationship and find out what NOT to do... Are you available to put the time into having and nurturing one? Will it be or become one of your priorities to be in one? LDR are not easy. Think long and hard if you are capable of sustaining one BEFORE you start having feelings for that awesome femme or butch. <that look out the window together on the phone in the morning and one has 6 feet of snow and the other is watching seagulls flying around and its 75 degrees outside at 8am and 11am for the other.> It took 3 hours to shovel and clean the car off This is where the "I wish you were here" begins. For the record I am not against LDR I have seen plenty work out wonderfully. And the last one... ARE YOU TRULY AVAILABLE mentally,emotionally, physically and spiritually TO EVEN BE IN A RELATIONSHIP??? What does single mean to you? The time spent reflecting after your relationship has ended is when you truly learn what not to do in your next relationship. It hurts but its a gift __________________ Remember anyone can love you when the sun is shining...In the storm is where you learn who truly cares for you Last edited by FeminineAllure; 03-20-2013 at 09:21 PM.

03-20-2013, 09:53 PM	#10
MysticOceansFL Senior Member How Do You Identify?: Butch, Preferred Pronoun?: People call me by my nic name. Relationship Status: Not Single, Not Desperate. Join Date: Jun 2010 Location: Florida Posts: 3,833 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 4,645 Thanked 4,033 Times in 1,720 Posts Rep Power: 21474855	. Simply don't assume. __________________ Faith is not belief without proof, but trust without reservation. It is said, " Some lives are linked across time..... Connected by an ancient calling that echoes through the ages "......

03-17-2013, 12:39 PM	#1
little_ms_sunshyne Senior Member How Do You Identify?: . Join Date: Oct 2010 Location: . Posts: 3,312 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 13,339 Thanked 12,241 Times in 2,541 Posts Rep Power: 21474855	Don't take each other for granted

03-17-2013, 12:44 PM	#2
girl_dee Practically Lives Here How Do You Identify?: Femme Preferred Pronoun?: dee Relationship Status: Hitched up Join Date: Nov 2009 Location: Livin’ the Dream Posts: 24,079 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 30,560 Thanked 54,829 Times in 13,908 Posts Rep Power: 21474874	don't forget what that first week was like....

03-20-2013, 02:03 PM	#5
Sweet Bliss Senior Member How Do You Identify?: I Am Preferred Pronoun?: she Relationship Status: solo Join Date: Mar 2010 Location: the Beach, Pacific side Posts: 4,160 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 5,354 Thanked 7,268 Times in 2,159 Posts Rep Power: 21474856	Refrain from saying 'all my exes.........' if you feel hurt, get some help. Assuming your current love is 'just like' your exes does both of you an injustice. It sets the stage for animosity.

03-20-2013, 02:23 PM	#7
CA_BabyCakes Member How Do You Identify?: All Femme Join Date: Mar 2012 Location: \ Posts: 364 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 231 Thanked 1,174 Times in 282 Posts Rep Power: 7129097	Dont assume that everyone has the same do's and don't as you do. What one assume to be a rule breaker another might see as adorable.

03-20-2013, 10:03 PM	#11
TheMerryFairy Senior Member How Do You Identify?: Pansexual/Sapiosexual femmey dyke who likes to crossdress now and then Preferred Pronoun?: She/her OR ze if I'm crossdressing Relationship Status: Floating and walking My path, happy in life. Join Date: Dec 2012 Location: On my Merry Fairy way! , Canada Posts: 3,630 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 8,727 Thanked 8,694 Times in 2,987 Posts Rep Power: 21474852	Don't ignore the other persons needs.