Healthy Weight Loss

[Miss Scarlett]

Saw my WL doctor yesterday...I'm down another 11.3 lbs since last month!

I'm thrilled with this but at the same time there's confusion stemming from internal conflict and a high level of insecurity and lack of confidence.

Last weekend I had a long conversation with a former boss who is also one of my most cherished friends, big brother and mentor. He told me "Don't let the opinions of others determine who you are or how you see yourself." He went on to suggest that I write this on my mirror and leave it there "until it sinks in." I haven't done that yet and may not but it's sound advice and some I need to follow...

To steal from a friend's song..."There's so much left to do but there's so much you've (I've) already done..."

I never expected there would be any conflict/confusion over the positive results of this journey. He asked me if had I known would I have started much less stayed with it? At the moment I don't really know...I did this for me...for my health...I was slowly dying from the excess weight...digging my own grave with my knife and fork.

Thankfully that is no longer the case, so mission accomplished. But this unsteady feeling from the collateral damage of my success is difficult for me...there's no "wall" for me to hide behind even if it was killing me there was a comfort there and sense of consistency...

There's a part of me, the "grown up," who knows I will overcome this and that gives me hope but at the same time little comfort. Because the other part of me is a very frightened "little girl" who feels lost, alone, abandoned, adrift, isolated...

Despite this I am determined to keep moving forward on this journey. Interesting though, the weight seems like just a battle to be easily won while the rest is all out war.

But a war that I am determined to win!

Sorry for rambling but this is some necessary venting...

Has anyone else experienced this or something similar? And if so, what did you do to help you overcome it?

[curlyredhead]

Originally Posted by Miss Scarlett

Saw my WL doctor yesterday...I'm down another 11.3 lbs since last month!

I'm thrilled with this but at the same time there's confusion stemming from internal conflict and a high level of insecurity and lack of confidence.

Last weekend I had a long conversation with a former boss who is also one of my most cherished friends, big brother and mentor. He told me "Don't let the opinions of others determine who you are or how you see yourself." He went on to suggest that I write this on my mirror and leave it there "until it sinks in." I haven't done that yet and may not but it's sound advice and some I need to follow...

To steal from a friend's song..."There's so much left to do but there's so much you've (I've) already done..."

I never expected there would be any conflict/confusion over the positive results of this journey. He asked me if had I known would I have started much less stayed with it? At the moment I don't really know...I did this for me...for my health...I was slowly dying from the excess weight...digging my own grave with my knife and fork.

Thankfully that is no longer the case, so mission accomplished. But this unsteady feeling from the collateral damage of my success is difficult for me...there's no "wall" for me to hide behind even if it was killing me there was a comfort there and sense of consistency...

There's a part of me, the "grown up," who knows I will overcome this and that gives me hope but at the same time little comfort. Because the other part of me is a very frightened "little girl" who feels lost, alone, abandoned, adrift, isolated...

Despite this I am determined to keep moving forward on this journey. Interesting though, the weight seems like just a battle to be easily won while the rest is all out war.

But a war that I am determined to win!

Sorry for rambling but this is some necessary venting...

Has anyone else experienced this or something similar? And if so, what did you do to help you overcome it?

I can relate to this in a different way and possibly a similar way as well.

I have a rare genetic defect that controls my life no matter what I do. When I say control it controls essentially how my body works. But there is a choice to make, do I allow it to control what I do for fun or my life in general absolutely not. In the past when I was younger it nearly caused me to commit suicide a few times. This is how overpowering it is. So far out of all the people I know with this disease, I am the most physically fit and active person.

At one point 6 years ago, I realized I had a choice. That choice was to continue eating the garbage and junk food I ate and gain weight till I had diabetes. Or start to make changes in my life to make me live longer and have fun doing it. I chose the second. Since that happened I went from 185lbs down to about 130lbs and now I am back up to 140lbs. Now my goal is to drop my body fat down to 12%.

Something I want to share with you, is the disease I have doesn't make me who I am, nor does the fact I am a sports fanatic now. I am still that guy who loves to make others laugh. Who is there for my friends and family. If you are struggling to figure out who you are ask your friends when they think of you what comes to mind. Work from that. You as a person as a whole will never change regardless of your weight.

[Hollylane]

Originally Posted by Miss Scarlett

Saw my WL doctor yesterday...I'm down another 11.3 lbs since last month!

I'm thrilled with this but at the same time there's confusion stemming from internal conflict and a high level of insecurity and lack of confidence.

Last weekend I had a long conversation with a former boss who is also one of my most cherished friends, big brother and mentor. He told me "Don't let the opinions of others determine who you are or how you see yourself." He went on to suggest that I write this on my mirror and leave it there "until it sinks in." I haven't done that yet and may not but it's sound advice and some I need to follow...

To steal from a friend's song..."There's so much left to do but there's so much you've (I've) already done..."

I never expected there would be any conflict/confusion over the positive results of this journey. He asked me if had I known would I have started much less stayed with it? At the moment I don't really know...I did this for me...for my health...I was slowly dying from the excess weight...digging my own grave with my knife and fork.

Thankfully that is no longer the case, so mission accomplished. But this unsteady feeling from the collateral damage of my success is difficult for me...there's no "wall" for me to hide behind even if it was killing me there was a comfort there and sense of consistency...

There's a part of me, the "grown up," who knows I will overcome this and that gives me hope but at the same time little comfort. Because the other part of me is a very frightened "little girl" who feels lost, alone, abandoned, adrift, isolated...

Despite this I am determined to keep moving forward on this journey. Interesting though, the weight seems like just a battle to be easily won while the rest is all out war.

But a war that I am determined to win!

Sorry for rambling but this is some necessary venting...

Has anyone else experienced this or something similar? And if so, what did you do to help you overcome it?

I have had multiple periods of my life where I have been larger than is healthy for me, some caused by health issues, some caused by my being not-so-attentive to my food choices...

When I am at a healthy weight, I have gone through periods of feeling more exposed, and vulnerable. At one time, after being assaulted, I think I even made a decision (subconsciously) to make myself an unhealthy size, to avoid men finding me attractive. Believe me, I was more than successful at achieving this.

Having been raised by a family who's main career choices center on mental health, I have never found therapists, or group therapy to be helpful, at all. Eventually, I just began having positive inner-monologues with myself, whenever I have feelings of vulnerability, or negative thoughts about my weight, or other peoples' weight. I have to do this, nearly every day, regardless of my size, or current health conditions.

Because, regardless of what my current weight/size is, my brain tells me that I am grossly overweight, so it is important that I the take time to remind myself daily, that my body shape/size does not reflect who I am as a person, and that the most important thing I can do for my body, is to keep trying to stay healthy. I also have to ignore the outside influence of others, who's idea of what is a healthy diet/weight, is very different from what is healthy for me. If I have a conversation about my diet with someone who thinks differently (something I avoid), I find that a lot of people can be utterly and completely negative.

[Dean Thoreau]

Having been the skinny person for 45 of my now 60 yrs on this planet, it has been very difficult for me to adapt to the bigger me...but alas I adapted rather well, and I can give u hundreds of excuses/reasons fro having gotten to the weight of 285 pounds....(actually i tipped 300 but whose counting).
For the past 4 months I have been following a rather strict diet, (Joel Fuhrmans Eat to Live), I am now at 238 (depending on the time of day) and I must admit Scarlet, it is really weird. I would have thought I would be overjoyed by the body changes, and reducation in weight...I am BUt....I have discovered eating was something I did out of boredom, lonleliness, laziness and..damn...I am addicted to sugary crap...One little smidgen and my entire being is craving for more more more....
I quit smoking over 5 years ago...I thought that was difficult, : O
The Eat to live diet is wonderful, I have more energy than I have had in years, I am never hungry and for me when I follow it religiouly, I am never hungry nor do I crave crap food, and I have not missed a single animal product.
I have met with Dr. fhurman, since he happens to practice in my hometown, I also checked him out with a bunch of folks...all I can say is, if it were not for Joel I would not have lost the weight..I have 65 pounds more to go...

One thing a diet can not help me with is..the way the body is loosing the weight..... this chest hasnt gone down at all...i no longer get mistaken for a guy. ..cause there is no way u can miss these puppies....but that is also an issue for me...I like being rather androgynous, (except when i need to use a bathroom) and I am rather butch....and now that...i am loosing weight everywhere but THERE....I feel like I am loosing part of me....
I sometimes wonder if that is why I allowed myself to gain so much weight,,,so my gut would stick out as much as my chest ..and all the psychological issues that went with that.
Well anyway, I am on this diet, it is working...and when I am on the roof of my house, wearing shorts, beater and work boots....old men come over and holler up to me " hey lady you need some help...." first time it happened i looked around to see if there was a lady in distress somewhere....

[Rockinonahigh]

Yeaterday I spent nearly all day either on the road or in at the pool hall,I did eat before I left home but after near eight hours of barely anything I felt like crap.I did a big nono on the way home cause I was to tired to fix anything when I finaly got home.Yes I sined and sined big time cause I stoped at churchies chicken for a box of my fave fried chicken and bisquits,I only had one bisquit plus three small peices of chicken over an hour so it wouldnt hit me stomach like a rock,today the poor things is on revolt kinda.Mostly all I wanted was a cool shower then a nap.The plus being I won a spopt to Vegas for the nationals in August,im still tired from yesterday.I still am watching what I eat even though the steroid shots I have gotten fro my back and shoulder are not helping to foght the weight gain thats going right to my gut.I wish I could find something that works in reduceig it but nothing seems to be working nomater how I work out...i'm not goveig up just wish something would woke even a little.

[Kelt]

Well, this should be a hot kettle of fish...

AMA declares obesity a disease Los Angeles Times

If Obesity Is a Disease, Who's Going to Treat It? Huffington Post

Obesity disease status could hurt insurance, help pharma NBC News

I was going to take a Coursera course on "Obesity and Economics" this summer. I had to push it off until next summer. Something tells me it is going to be a lot more interesting a year from now.

[Hollylane]

I'm struggling today, just completely impatient with my body, and the way it works (my gastric issues). I need more sleep, because sleep is a very important part (for me) of losing the unhealthy extra weight. I just can't seem to catch more than 5 hours of sleep at a time, this is making exercise a real challenge.

[PaPa]

Well, the time has come when I MUST tackle the weight loss goal with sincerity. I saw a weight loss doc last Monday and she has informed me that she feels the BPD/DS surgery is the best choice for me although the ultimate decision must be made by me. I have gained and lost over the years but each time increasing until at my current weight. Most people don't have to hit the bottom of the barrel with their weight issues, but for me it had to be all the way to the bottom. Soooo...over the last week I have read the entire folder of information they gave to me, began keeping a daily log of intake and exercise (honestly the exercise must be seated because it has gotten that bad for me). I say that in shame, but know there is still hope to improve or I would not even be posting here. I also bought 3 books from OA and have started a daily journal of my thoughts and emotions about my journey. I figure it can definitely help me to get both feet up on the wagon and be willing to make this work.

For some reason in past attempts when trying to lose this excess weight, I would get off say 30 to 60 pounds and all of a sudden I would feel like I were starving or something would happen in my life and I can honestly say I made a mental choice to throw it away. I really want it to be different this time. I really want this monkey off of my back so hope to gain support here as well as who I have in my real life with the support groups and docs, etc...

The foreword of the OA text had a statement that hit me today. It stated "I feel that eating binges are often displaced temper tantrums or rage reactions." How many times when I go for food is it because of something I am feeling emotionally that I dislike?? This also ties in with a quote from a friend of mine that I met on Facebook. A while back she posted "Life is a feast - do not feed your appetite; choose your hunger." To me this has great meaning. Life has so much to offer and instead of compulsively overeating think of the long term. The real hunger is for life...to live fully again. Therefore, each time when encountering food it is possible for me to think of my ultimate goal which is life and doing the things that I can no longer do instead of feeding to relieve the emotional discomfort I am experiencing.

I don't know if this resonates with anyone else, but I have found for today those have been some of my thoughts about my current journey....AND I feel like I have just rambled incessantly and really said not much of anything. LOL!!