Breaking it down - describe the Femme that you are

silkepus · 12-18-2013, 10:31 AM

I’ve struggled for some time with my femme identity. I wasn’t sure I was even a lesbian until I stumbled upon butches/studs/bois/masculine of center lesbians and something in me just went- yes, yes please.

So at first I thought I had to be femme because, I was attracted to butches. But that kind of annoyed me. I don’t want to take on an identity that’s only based on who I fancy. So I’ve read up a lot on butch/femme dynamics and identities, but I have yet to find a clear reason to why, apart from my butchfancies I should label myself a femme.

I know who I am as a person. I'm bookish and kind of nerdy. I like some girly things like dresses and baking and adorable things as well as using the word adorable (a lot). But I also like traditionally masculine things, like camping and fishing. I prefer blue to pink, I prefer barefoot to heels.

There isn’t anything especially about me that would stand out as femme or feminine, I look like your average 23 soon to be 24 year old.

I think the reason I identify as femme is simply because it sits right with me. When I heard the word and found out about it all, something just felt right.

I read somewhere, although I don’t remember quite where, that femme is finding a way to be a girl that doesn’t hurt. Something about that really gets me.

12-18-2013, 10:31 AM	#32
silkepus Member How Do You Identify?: covered in ink and glitter Preferred Pronoun?: feminine ones Relationship Status: watching pictures of cats on tumblr Join Date: Dec 2013 Location: Scandinavia Posts: 382 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 359 Thanked 701 Times in 196 Posts Rep Power: 10186798	I’ve struggled for some time with my femme identity. I wasn’t sure I was even a lesbian until I stumbled upon butches/studs/bois/masculine of center lesbians and something in me just went- yes, yes please. So at first I thought I had to be femme because, I was attracted to butches. But that kind of annoyed me. I don’t want to take on an identity that’s only based on who I fancy. So I’ve read up a lot on butch/femme dynamics and identities, but I have yet to find a clear reason to why, apart from my butchfancies I should label myself a femme. I know who I am as a person. I'm bookish and kind of nerdy. I like some girly things like dresses and baking and adorable things as well as using the word adorable (a lot). But I also like traditionally masculine things, like camping and fishing. I prefer blue to pink, I prefer barefoot to heels. There isn’t anything especially about me that would stand out as femme or feminine, I look like your average 23 soon to be 24 year old. I think the reason I identify as femme is simply because it sits right with me. When I heard the word and found out about it all, something just felt right. I read somewhere, although I don’t remember quite where, that femme is finding a way to be a girl that doesn’t hurt. Something about that really gets me.