What fart did you fart today?

puddin' · 02-09-2014, 03:06 PM

i burped at work yestaday (one o' those short, barky burps) and it was mistaken by a co-worker fo' a fart!

how does that even happen?!! lol

batennisboy · 02-09-2014, 05:38 PM

Was walking down the hallway yesterday and thy fart felt it necessary to be released. It was a "walk the walk" fart - bits being released with each step and thus butt movement. It was further punctuated with a statement "period" short and sweet definitive fart.

Liam · 02-09-2014, 10:31 PM

Just a couple of putt putts today, while puttering about the house. It would seem that I have become a shadow of the Olympian Farter, I once was. *Sigh*

nycfem · 02-12-2014, 07:54 PM

One from yesterday, one from today:

Yesterday: THE FREUDIAN FART

I ran into someone I knew and didn't want to really do the "Hi, how are you, what have you been up to" thing with him but did anyway. So we were having our upbeat convo, and I asked about how his on-again, off-again girlfriend was doing. He said, "She's doing an internship in Oakland, California for a year. It's a fellowship on renewable energy. She's become really interested in fresh air." I don't know if it was the unconscious power of suggestion or what but the moment the words "fresh air" were spoken I let a "silent but deadly" rip. "Anyway nice seeing you!" he called over his shoulder as he trotted off at a brisk pace.

Today: THE "WAKE THE DEAD" FART

After a fine meal of collard greens, injera (Ethiopian bread), shiro (Ethiopian chick pea stew), and Red Velvet ice cream (Ben & Jerry's), I felt a loud fart coming on. Sometimes one could stifle it but a sense of "Seize the Day! You only live once!" takes over, and instead it's given red carpet treatment. In this case that meant, lifting a cheek off the chair and pushing with gusto. I was sitting at my computer desk and BB was sitting at the dining room table eating take-out Italian, so I thought maybe just maybe, somehow, I could get away with BB not having heard it. But instead, instantly, a sleeping cat woke and stared at me, and BB nearly dropped hys fork. I said, "I think I woke the cat." BB said, "Are you kidding, Honey? You woke the dead."

Julie · 02-12-2014, 07:58 PM

I FARTED for the Preacher today!
And the Preacker cackled.

Medusa · 02-12-2014, 08:02 PM

I can verify said fart

Dreamer · 02-12-2014, 08:06 PM

Omg I am already imagining the wedding and New Orleans farts... Look out guests.

solamite · 02-16-2014, 08:19 PM

Juz pullz meez finga & u willz noe wat kind of fart I didz todae.

GraffitiBoi · 02-16-2014, 10:50 PM

02-09-2014, 03:06 PM	#1
puddin' Infamous Member How Do You Identify?: a genderqueer nuisance Preferred Pronoun?: bitchboi Join Date: Aug 2011 Location: new zealand Posts: 7,120 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 9,467 Thanked 7,962 Times in 2,340 Posts Rep Power: 21474858	i burped at work yestaday (one o' those short, barky burps) and it was mistaken by a co-worker fo' a fart! how does that even happen?!! lol __________________ be true, be you, be brave. Last edited by puddin'; 02-09-2014 at 03:12 PM. Reason: burp clarification

02-09-2014, 10:31 PM	#3
Liam Senior Member How Do You Identify?: Guy Preferred Pronoun?: He, Him, His Join Date: Nov 2009 Location: The Evergreen State Posts: 2,269 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 14,865 Thanked 6,875 Times in 1,861 Posts Rep Power: 21474854	Just a couple of putt putts today, while puttering about the house. It would seem that I have become a shadow of the Olympian Farter, I once was. Sigh __________________ <3 Love is weird.

02-12-2014, 07:54 PM	#4
nycfem Moderator How Do You Identify?: femme sub Preferred Pronoun?: Baby Grrl Relationship Status: Attached Join Date: Nov 2009 Location: NYC Posts: 6,793 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 52,987 Thanked 21,452 Times in 5,101 Posts Rep Power: 21474855	One from yesterday, one from today: Yesterday: THE FREUDIAN FART I ran into someone I knew and didn't want to really do the "Hi, how are you, what have you been up to" thing with him but did anyway. So we were having our upbeat convo, and I asked about how his on-again, off-again girlfriend was doing. He said, "She's doing an internship in Oakland, California for a year. It's a fellowship on renewable energy. She's become really interested in fresh air." I don't know if it was the unconscious power of suggestion or what but the moment the words "fresh air" were spoken I let a "silent but deadly" rip. "Anyway nice seeing you!" he called over his shoulder as he trotted off at a brisk pace. Today: THE "WAKE THE DEAD" FART After a fine meal of collard greens, injera (Ethiopian bread), shiro (Ethiopian chick pea stew), and Red Velvet ice cream (Ben & Jerry's), I felt a loud fart coming on. Sometimes one could stifle it but a sense of "Seize the Day! You only live once!" takes over, and instead it's given red carpet treatment. In this case that meant, lifting a cheek off the chair and pushing with gusto. I was sitting at my computer desk and BB was sitting at the dining room table eating take-out Italian, so I thought maybe just maybe, somehow, I could get away with BB not having heard it. But instead, instantly, a sleeping cat woke and stared at me, and BB nearly dropped hys fork. I said, "I think I woke the cat." BB said, "Are you kidding, Honey? You woke the dead." __________________ *** How do I... ?** Check out the Members Helping Members thread: http://www.butchfemmeplanet.com/foru...embers+Helping

02-12-2014, 07:58 PM	#5
Julie Senior Member How Do You Identify?: Angel * Femme * Lesbian * Girl * Woman * Slut * Bitch * Preferred Pronoun?: She Relationship Status: No longer a Virgin Bride to Dreamer ~ May 17th, 2014 Join Date: Nov 2009 Location: New York Posts: 4,674 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 17,676 Thanked 18,160 Times in 3,633 Posts Rep Power: 21474856	I FARTED for the Preacher today! And the Preacker cackled. __________________ “Sometimes only one person is missing and the whole world seems depopulated.” ~ Alphonse de Lamartine - 1790-1869 http://i374.photobucket.com/albums/o...ps4d9fb6c0.jpg I Love You ~ I Love Us May 17, 2014

02-12-2014, 08:02 PM	#6
Medusa Mentally Delicious How Do You Identify?: Queer High Femme, thank you very much Preferred Pronoun?: Mme. Relationship Status: Married to JD. Join Date: Oct 2009 Location: Atlanta Posts: 10,446 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 5,995 Thanked 42,686 Times in 7,831 Posts Rep Power: 10000025	I can verify said fart __________________ . . . Buy ButchFemmePlanet Merch Here: https://teespring.com/stores/butchfemmeplanetcom-merch

02-09-2014, 05:38 PM	#2
batennisboy Junior Member How Do You Identify?: Queer Preferred Pronoun?: He Relationship Status: In love with the fuzzy yellow objects of my affection. Join Date: Jul 2013 Location: Bay Area, CA Posts: 82 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 284 Thanked 277 Times in 79 Posts Rep Power: 4135522	Was walking down the hallway yesterday and thy fart felt it necessary to be released. It was a "walk the walk" fart - bits being released with each step and thus butt movement. It was further punctuated with a statement "period" short and sweet definitive fart.

02-12-2014, 08:06 PM	#7
Dreamer Member How Do You Identify?: butch Relationship Status: Dreams do come true... Join Date: Nov 2009 Location: Home with my beautiful wife Posts: 1,143 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 1,642 Thanked 4,234 Times in 950 Posts Rep Power: 21474853	Omg I am already imagining the wedding and New Orleans farts... Look out guests. __________________ "Let your mind start a journey through a strange new world. Leave all thoughts of the world you knew before. Let your soul take you where you long to be...Close your eyes let your spirit start to soar, and you'll live as you have never lived before" ~Erich~

02-16-2014, 08:19 PM	#8
solamite Junior Member How Do You Identify?: SOLAMITE Preferred Pronoun?: Agglutinative Relationship Status: SINGLE Join Date: Nov 2009 Location: Shoe Box Posts: 66 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 8 Thanked 28 Times in 12 Posts Rep Power: 488318	Juz pullz meez finga & u willz noe wat kind of fart I didz todae.

02-16-2014, 10:50 PM	#9
GraffitiBoi Member How Do You Identify?: Transmasculine Preferred Pronoun?: Male ones Relationship Status: Playing around and having fun Join Date: Oct 2012 Location: Minnetonka, MN Posts: 903 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 990 Thanked 3,663 Times in 824 Posts Rep Power: 21474849